/sigh
tonight i am struggling with some serious depression. i think it came from reading the news today and feeling completely and totally flabergasted over the fact that the national healthcare bill does not support "elective" abortions. the first thought that went though my head after reading that was, what does this mean for rape?
i am so fucking frustrated with politics. i am frustrated and angry over how they make me feel completely unvalidated and misunderstood, uncared for.
if at 15 i hadn't miscarried and had to have choosen to have a kid from a rape or an aborsion I would like to think that the leaders of the country i live in had at least thought of me and provided me with some sort of avenue to get help.
of course why should i be suprised? the one fucking time I went to the hospital to get a rape kit done I was
1. told by the cop who helped me that they believed me because i was "not the usual type of victum they got" I was a "nice girl working hard in school who came from a good family." Since they didnt know shit about me I am assuming that means because I looked white. gee that just helped build my trust.
2. spent the next 2 years fighting the bill from my hospital visit, which was supposed to be covered but they kept sending it to me. one of my friends, I can't even remember who, finally took the paper from me and said they would take care of it. to this day i am not sure how they got the calls to stop. if they finally figured out some paper i was supposed to file or maybe even took pity on me and just paid the bill. who knows.
and of course that is just about me and not even hitting on the zillion other issues i have with it. Just one more thing to add onto the long list of shit that needs change. of things I don't understand.
i gotta stop posting, i am getting wayyy to depressed and self hating right now. i wish i had something to smoke right now.
i am so fucking frustrated with politics. i am frustrated and angry over how they make me feel completely unvalidated and misunderstood, uncared for.
if at 15 i hadn't miscarried and had to have choosen to have a kid from a rape or an aborsion I would like to think that the leaders of the country i live in had at least thought of me and provided me with some sort of avenue to get help.
of course why should i be suprised? the one fucking time I went to the hospital to get a rape kit done I was
1. told by the cop who helped me that they believed me because i was "not the usual type of victum they got" I was a "nice girl working hard in school who came from a good family." Since they didnt know shit about me I am assuming that means because I looked white. gee that just helped build my trust.
2. spent the next 2 years fighting the bill from my hospital visit, which was supposed to be covered but they kept sending it to me. one of my friends, I can't even remember who, finally took the paper from me and said they would take care of it. to this day i am not sure how they got the calls to stop. if they finally figured out some paper i was supposed to file or maybe even took pity on me and just paid the bill. who knows.
and of course that is just about me and not even hitting on the zillion other issues i have with it. Just one more thing to add onto the long list of shit that needs change. of things I don't understand.
i gotta stop posting, i am getting wayyy to depressed and self hating right now. i wish i had something to smoke right now.