an abundance of emotions

[musicizinme]

I am freaking out here. I have SO much to get done and i feel like I have no time to do it. I am constantly sad.... I feel like crying....and it doesn't take much for me to cry....(as i tear up writing this). Luckily I switch over to the Nuva ring instead of seasonique so i'll have a lower dosage of horomones. I'm so sick of this shit. I can't REALLY do anything untill i get insurance (after september) because if they find anything before then it becomes a pre existing and no one will cover it... My heart hurts...Id on't know why....It just hurts, I feel as if all of my past pains are reforming and coming back up...maybe Im realeasing them? what in the hell is going on with me? I'm so cloudy headed and spaced out and confused...i've gone brain dead....i wish i was deadened to sadness...I've experienced enough of that in life I don't want to feel it when Im suppose to be getting married I'm suppose to be happy right?

I feel so strung out and stressed....i dont even want to go to work today.
I'm tired of crying for no reason other than my heart hurts.
I'm so confused. I'm so scared of some things.

*screams* somebody help me pleeeeeeeease