family
Family can be the greatest thing in the world. There to support you and help you become a better person. They care about you and and offer help when...... F*** this. This is a rant about the stupidity and ignorance that my family lives in and uses to try to protect themselves from the truth.
I grew up in my family as THE helper. I was there for any of them to help with what ever they needed. I never spoke my opinion to them for multiple reasons while growing up. During my time, as a kid, with them I learned of how they lied to each, talk about each other behind their backs, act all nice when they really wanted to argue, or just avoid them all together and what until things were old and forgotten. During that time I gain a great need to truth and honesty. And I gave my family the benefit of the doubt that maybe they would work it out some day, also they are my family so to forgive them for their inability to deal with things was the right thing to do.
Apparently I am not so forgiving any more. I sorta went off on my sister about three weeks ago about how she let her daughter dress in public. I said nothing in anger. I accidentally sidestepped a topic onto personal thoughts and opinions and just ran with it. My opinion upset my sister greatly and she ran from the room crying. Her husband was floored and didn't know what to say. By they way this is my eldest sibling who is in her late 40's. She has yet to say anything to me about this. But I have found out she has spoken to the rest of my family and told them that she loves me and forgives me. But she hasn't said anything to me about any of this. I hear about it from my mother. Some of my family think I should apologize to her. I told my mom, since she is the one that called me to chat, that I have no plans of apologizing for my opinion. Plus I can't say whether she was hurt by me or the other facets of the topic.
I do believe that I hurt my sister with the words that I spoke. But I am not sorry for my words or the pain they caused her. I am returning the pain that was caused to me when I tell me fiends that the hot little blonde number in the read dress that had a slit all the way up the thigh was my 16 year old niece. At that moment my niece was no longer an innocent little girl that she walked in the room as, she had become a piece of eye candy for all the horny men in the room. And I know that her mother, my sister, knew what her 16 year old daughter was dress like because my whole family came to my wedding. So in the middle of my wedding I'm having to tell drooling 20-somethings that she is underage and my niece.
My family is not use to being told the truth. They don't like dealing with confrontation. They would rather talk to others and ignore the real people involved or the real problems. They make what ever lies they need or ignore what ever to make it so they can sleep at night. It is one thing to say I feel bad for the starving and the homeless that are hundreds of mile away and I accept there is nothing I can do about. But it is unhealthy to lie to yourself about your life and the elements that make up your life.
As far as my family goes. I am no longer the quiet, unspoken brother that they knew. If they ask my opinion I will give it to them and most likely they will not like it. I might lose a family, but that is better than losing myself to lies.
I grew up in my family as THE helper. I was there for any of them to help with what ever they needed. I never spoke my opinion to them for multiple reasons while growing up. During my time, as a kid, with them I learned of how they lied to each, talk about each other behind their backs, act all nice when they really wanted to argue, or just avoid them all together and what until things were old and forgotten. During that time I gain a great need to truth and honesty. And I gave my family the benefit of the doubt that maybe they would work it out some day, also they are my family so to forgive them for their inability to deal with things was the right thing to do.
Apparently I am not so forgiving any more. I sorta went off on my sister about three weeks ago about how she let her daughter dress in public. I said nothing in anger. I accidentally sidestepped a topic onto personal thoughts and opinions and just ran with it. My opinion upset my sister greatly and she ran from the room crying. Her husband was floored and didn't know what to say. By they way this is my eldest sibling who is in her late 40's. She has yet to say anything to me about this. But I have found out she has spoken to the rest of my family and told them that she loves me and forgives me. But she hasn't said anything to me about any of this. I hear about it from my mother. Some of my family think I should apologize to her. I told my mom, since she is the one that called me to chat, that I have no plans of apologizing for my opinion. Plus I can't say whether she was hurt by me or the other facets of the topic.
I do believe that I hurt my sister with the words that I spoke. But I am not sorry for my words or the pain they caused her. I am returning the pain that was caused to me when I tell me fiends that the hot little blonde number in the read dress that had a slit all the way up the thigh was my 16 year old niece. At that moment my niece was no longer an innocent little girl that she walked in the room as, she had become a piece of eye candy for all the horny men in the room. And I know that her mother, my sister, knew what her 16 year old daughter was dress like because my whole family came to my wedding. So in the middle of my wedding I'm having to tell drooling 20-somethings that she is underage and my niece.
My family is not use to being told the truth. They don't like dealing with confrontation. They would rather talk to others and ignore the real people involved or the real problems. They make what ever lies they need or ignore what ever to make it so they can sleep at night. It is one thing to say I feel bad for the starving and the homeless that are hundreds of mile away and I accept there is nothing I can do about. But it is unhealthy to lie to yourself about your life and the elements that make up your life.
As far as my family goes. I am no longer the quiet, unspoken brother that they knew. If they ask my opinion I will give it to them and most likely they will not like it. I might lose a family, but that is better than losing myself to lies.