(no subject)
I just had one of the worst dreams ever and even though I slept for 3 hours, I don't want to sleep anymore. So another 3 hour day it is...
I have horrible dreams, but they're rarely about any harm coming to anyone I know. Well, my grandfather just died (this is the first of my grandparents to pass away), and I couldn't go home to his funeral because the BF didn't want me to travel across the state alone, and of course he couldn't get off work.
So in my dream he had died, of course... but then my dad died, too. There was some confusion, because at one point it almost seemed like it was my grandmother (the exwife of the deceased grandparent) that died, but no, I'm pretty sure it was my dad. Because my step mother brought out his urn (it was a square based thing on slim steel feet with kind of a trapezoidal shape, getting bigger towards the top with the lid), and I heard things rattle inside it along with the dust...and we were wondering whether to bury them or spread them or something. I went to their house, and my dad had made a ton of platters of food before he died, and they had gotten one cat plus a big mountain lion that was so white it almost looked like a white tiger, minus the stripes of course. The only comforting part of the dream was that the lion was so cuddly and we cuddled up together and were tickling each other.
But then came the point with the urn, which almost slid off a coffee table at one point...and yeah, I was crying so much in the dream that my eyes were puffy there and I saw petechiae forming on my face...and I actually woke up with this intense feeling of pressure in my head, so much so that I expected my eyes not to open all the way from how waterlogged I thought they would be.
Oh, and then at one point in the dream there were doctors, and they said that both my dad and my grandfather died randomly from their first round of chemo--that that was a rare occurrence, but it happened more for adults, and it happened to both of them. In reality my grandfather probably passed away from an MI and my dad already went through chemo once but JFC... just another stab in the heart.
I have horrible dreams, but they're rarely about any harm coming to anyone I know. Well, my grandfather just died (this is the first of my grandparents to pass away), and I couldn't go home to his funeral because the BF didn't want me to travel across the state alone, and of course he couldn't get off work.
So in my dream he had died, of course... but then my dad died, too. There was some confusion, because at one point it almost seemed like it was my grandmother (the exwife of the deceased grandparent) that died, but no, I'm pretty sure it was my dad. Because my step mother brought out his urn (it was a square based thing on slim steel feet with kind of a trapezoidal shape, getting bigger towards the top with the lid), and I heard things rattle inside it along with the dust...and we were wondering whether to bury them or spread them or something. I went to their house, and my dad had made a ton of platters of food before he died, and they had gotten one cat plus a big mountain lion that was so white it almost looked like a white tiger, minus the stripes of course. The only comforting part of the dream was that the lion was so cuddly and we cuddled up together and were tickling each other.
But then came the point with the urn, which almost slid off a coffee table at one point...and yeah, I was crying so much in the dream that my eyes were puffy there and I saw petechiae forming on my face...and I actually woke up with this intense feeling of pressure in my head, so much so that I expected my eyes not to open all the way from how waterlogged I thought they would be.
Oh, and then at one point in the dream there were doctors, and they said that both my dad and my grandfather died randomly from their first round of chemo--that that was a rare occurrence, but it happened more for adults, and it happened to both of them. In reality my grandfather probably passed away from an MI and my dad already went through chemo once but JFC... just another stab in the heart.