What a bonus
So Date #3 went well -- got a bit more than just one drink out of it. The guy -- I'll call him Max -- was cute in a boyish way. He was slight in stature, probably no more than 5'6", with a thin frame. It was clear that I could break him in half. I stood a tad taller than him in my two-inch heels and had to fight the urge to slouch. When I arrived, he was already nursing a glass of Jameson, neat. We hugged in greeting and he got me a drink. We immediately began to talk as if we'd hung out before. He was funny and quick and conversation was effortless.
The bar was a low-key hipster affair, with a long bench that lined the wall and tiny tables barely the size of stools spaced at intervals. We sat in a dim corner, side-by-side on the bench, and talked about food shows, restaurants, travel, and whiskey. It felt easy and natural and we riffed off each other as if we were doing improv. I laughed a lot and was marveling at how engaged I felt, in contrast to my date on Sunday. That date was pleasant but this one was fun. I don't know if it's just a chemistry thing or because Date #2 was at a coffee house during the day and this one was at a dimly lit bar with cocktails, but it was nice to be having a blast.
We got another round of drinks and kept talking. After about an hour, he leaned in and kissed me, which sort of took me by surprise. I'm not sure why, since he was pretty flirty early on, grabbing my hand and sitting reallycloselikethis and getting all touchy-feely. He was cute and not a bad kisser, so I went with it. We continued to hang out and talk for about another hour, punctuated with bouts of kissing. I have to say, he was really into it, which sort of shocked me. Like, Omigod, this guy is really enjoying himself! What is up with that? I realized I hadn't been kissed with that much enthusiasm since February, which is kind of depressing, since my relationship ended in April.
He finally walked me to my car, which I'd mistakenly parked in a sketchy neighborhood, and I drove him to his car. Before he got out, we made out in my car for a little while longer, and then he suggested going to his car, which, he informed me, had tinted windows. I thought, "What the hell," and went with him, but once we slid into the back seat of his Prius I started wondering how far I was going to let it go. I liked his enthusiasm and the kissing was really fun, but after a while I realized that I didn't feel like rounding more than a base or two. And as much as I was enjoying making out with someone, I wasn't swept off my feet or blinded with lust or anything. I mean, I just met the guy. So I pulled away and excused myself.
"I should go...I barely know you," I said lightly. He didn't kick up any fuss, just walked me to my car and kissed me again really passionately. Given that I was wondering if I'd ever get kissed again this year (or ever), I'd say it was a good date. I think it's safe to say that if I really wanted to just have sex, I could have. Max made it clear he'd be game, and even tried to introduce me to Little Max (who wasn't all that max, but not super little either). But while I really appreciated that he found me desirable, especially after feeling like a leper towards the end of my last two relationships, I'm not that slutty. Seriously, I didn't even know the guy's last name. But I did learn that he was Korean, and since he has a very distinctive first name, I Googled it today and tacked on "Kim" and BAM. Found him.
Anyway, he texted me yesterday with a nice note, and I thanked him for the fun time. But despite our make-out session, I'm not expecting to see the guy again. I got the feeling that he was just out to have fun. Our conversation was all light banter -- he wasn't all that interested in getting to know me and volunteered almost nothing about himself. Which is probably what I need, actually -- just fun. To tell the truth, I'm still too burned. I mean, I get a cute guy all over me and all I can think is damn, AG really checked out in the last two months, if the last time I got good kissing was in February. Going on these dates (1, 2 and 3) also make me think of the first few dates I had with Actor Guy -- how heady and impassioned and wonderful they were, and how electrifying it was when we kissed on our early dates. Also how much of an effort AG made to get to know me first, compared to this kissy Max guy. Argh, it started off so promising with AG and flamed out so horribly. It bums me out.
On the other hand, it's always nice to be kissed. That was a nice unexpected bonus. Thanks to the directive from my therapist to go on two dates, I've learned that it's 1) easy to go on dates if your standards aren't overly high and 2) possible to get a little action if you don't care about getting to know someone. It gives me a little hope that maybe, just maybe, I won't end up a shriveled old crone, never to feel a man's touch again. So that's something.
The bar was a low-key hipster affair, with a long bench that lined the wall and tiny tables barely the size of stools spaced at intervals. We sat in a dim corner, side-by-side on the bench, and talked about food shows, restaurants, travel, and whiskey. It felt easy and natural and we riffed off each other as if we were doing improv. I laughed a lot and was marveling at how engaged I felt, in contrast to my date on Sunday. That date was pleasant but this one was fun. I don't know if it's just a chemistry thing or because Date #2 was at a coffee house during the day and this one was at a dimly lit bar with cocktails, but it was nice to be having a blast.
We got another round of drinks and kept talking. After about an hour, he leaned in and kissed me, which sort of took me by surprise. I'm not sure why, since he was pretty flirty early on, grabbing my hand and sitting reallycloselikethis and getting all touchy-feely. He was cute and not a bad kisser, so I went with it. We continued to hang out and talk for about another hour, punctuated with bouts of kissing. I have to say, he was really into it, which sort of shocked me. Like, Omigod, this guy is really enjoying himself! What is up with that? I realized I hadn't been kissed with that much enthusiasm since February, which is kind of depressing, since my relationship ended in April.
He finally walked me to my car, which I'd mistakenly parked in a sketchy neighborhood, and I drove him to his car. Before he got out, we made out in my car for a little while longer, and then he suggested going to his car, which, he informed me, had tinted windows. I thought, "What the hell," and went with him, but once we slid into the back seat of his Prius I started wondering how far I was going to let it go. I liked his enthusiasm and the kissing was really fun, but after a while I realized that I didn't feel like rounding more than a base or two. And as much as I was enjoying making out with someone, I wasn't swept off my feet or blinded with lust or anything. I mean, I just met the guy. So I pulled away and excused myself.
"I should go...I barely know you," I said lightly. He didn't kick up any fuss, just walked me to my car and kissed me again really passionately. Given that I was wondering if I'd ever get kissed again this year (or ever), I'd say it was a good date. I think it's safe to say that if I really wanted to just have sex, I could have. Max made it clear he'd be game, and even tried to introduce me to Little Max (who wasn't all that max, but not super little either). But while I really appreciated that he found me desirable, especially after feeling like a leper towards the end of my last two relationships, I'm not that slutty. Seriously, I didn't even know the guy's last name. But I did learn that he was Korean, and since he has a very distinctive first name, I Googled it today and tacked on "Kim" and BAM. Found him.
Anyway, he texted me yesterday with a nice note, and I thanked him for the fun time. But despite our make-out session, I'm not expecting to see the guy again. I got the feeling that he was just out to have fun. Our conversation was all light banter -- he wasn't all that interested in getting to know me and volunteered almost nothing about himself. Which is probably what I need, actually -- just fun. To tell the truth, I'm still too burned. I mean, I get a cute guy all over me and all I can think is damn, AG really checked out in the last two months, if the last time I got good kissing was in February. Going on these dates (1, 2 and 3) also make me think of the first few dates I had with Actor Guy -- how heady and impassioned and wonderful they were, and how electrifying it was when we kissed on our early dates. Also how much of an effort AG made to get to know me first, compared to this kissy Max guy. Argh, it started off so promising with AG and flamed out so horribly. It bums me out.
On the other hand, it's always nice to be kissed. That was a nice unexpected bonus. Thanks to the directive from my therapist to go on two dates, I've learned that it's 1) easy to go on dates if your standards aren't overly high and 2) possible to get a little action if you don't care about getting to know someone. It gives me a little hope that maybe, just maybe, I won't end up a shriveled old crone, never to feel a man's touch again. So that's something.