too long for a comment, it gets its own post

[much_ado]

a pretty lad who was awake in the wee small hours this morning asked a couple of fun questions about seduction and courting, namely "What is seduction to you? What is your favourite seduction technique? (as the seducer or seducee

Comments

[courtly]

Deign!? What are you saying here? LOL

I've worked it through a bit over the last while. I've long noted that I don't seduce (going by how you frame that term here). Flirting with intent never has, for me, had any sort of immediacy to it, outside of the context of an established relationship.

If I flirt with intent, it is the intent to create a relationship from which a future step into intimacy is possible. If I accept flirting with intent, it's limited to the same.

I had never really wondered why I had those lines (for as long as I can recall). Mostly I just teased myself for being a reserved prude. But having spend a little bit of time this summer working on accepting myself (for the first time ever, at least deliberately), I've turned more towards trying to understand WHY I have those lines. And I haven't figured it out yet, but this post did make me think about how I react to seduction.

In the end I find I quite agree with you on the matter of being clear about what one wants, but I still run up against the barriers of reflexively rejecting any sort of immediate gratification in that list of wants. So I'm still thinking through that one.