(no subject)
i feel better today...I just got back from my last home cross country meet (tear) and we kicked ass. Im always in a good mood when i run well...it gets out a lot of stress. my time was 21:30...on our home course which is a really fucking slow course and since my PR is 21:28 id say im on the right track...should be able to run under 21 min by districts..hell yeah..i placed 2nd in the race today which is also kickass...Amanda placed 3rd. We won but we only beat Grafton by 1 point!!! ahhh!! but fair and square right?? we still won. haha....
wow..mike rode his bike to school today....i know it took him at least an hour to get there....haha...hes such a dork!
I dropped out of Adv Acting...i have a study hall now..it was a complete waste of my time in the first place...so im not doing that stupid stagehands play anymore....thank god. mrs martin can kiss my ass...im not pulling her curtain.
I am worried about Owen...he thinks i dont care about him which isn't true. It was always difficult for me to help him through things because im not a very good listener when it comes to other people's issues (neither is he i might add) but i at least wish i could hug him or something...would that make him feel better??? i dunno...but it sure as hell would do a better job than beer. The whole beer thing upsets me too...i mean...is he going to get drunk everytime something goes wrong in his life?? that's no way to live and i dont know one decent girl who would find that even slightly attractive. I'm not saying that it would be easy for him not to drink....because i believe hes well on his way to alcoholism...but what he doesnt understand is that the fact that he drinks so much turned me off from the very moment i realized the extent of it. The smoking turned me off too...i mean...im not at all saying that he should change because i say so....all im saying is that its a shame that he thinks that for people to like him he has to spend money on them and get drunk and smoke....its simply not true...in fact i was much more attracted to Owen when I first met him. He was very professional...i would have never guessed that he smoked or drank excessively. I asked him out because I was completely and totally attracted to the geeky sweet side in him....his intelligent side. I don't need a relationship based off of sex and beer...and i realized that's what it would have been when he decided things were falling apart when i wouldnt have sex with him anymore. I know for a fact that if we had had romantic sex last time i was up there that he would think things were fine...nothing to worry about. I'm just sick of being used as a piece of meat. I want a guy to be able to look me in the EYES (not the boobs) and say "You are drop-dead georgous" but it never seems to play out that way....maybe it would if i didnt have boobs....who knows
wow..mike rode his bike to school today....i know it took him at least an hour to get there....haha...hes such a dork!
I dropped out of Adv Acting...i have a study hall now..it was a complete waste of my time in the first place...so im not doing that stupid stagehands play anymore....thank god. mrs martin can kiss my ass...im not pulling her curtain.
I am worried about Owen...he thinks i dont care about him which isn't true. It was always difficult for me to help him through things because im not a very good listener when it comes to other people's issues (neither is he i might add) but i at least wish i could hug him or something...would that make him feel better??? i dunno...but it sure as hell would do a better job than beer. The whole beer thing upsets me too...i mean...is he going to get drunk everytime something goes wrong in his life?? that's no way to live and i dont know one decent girl who would find that even slightly attractive. I'm not saying that it would be easy for him not to drink....because i believe hes well on his way to alcoholism...but what he doesnt understand is that the fact that he drinks so much turned me off from the very moment i realized the extent of it. The smoking turned me off too...i mean...im not at all saying that he should change because i say so....all im saying is that its a shame that he thinks that for people to like him he has to spend money on them and get drunk and smoke....its simply not true...in fact i was much more attracted to Owen when I first met him. He was very professional...i would have never guessed that he smoked or drank excessively. I asked him out because I was completely and totally attracted to the geeky sweet side in him....his intelligent side. I don't need a relationship based off of sex and beer...and i realized that's what it would have been when he decided things were falling apart when i wouldnt have sex with him anymore. I know for a fact that if we had had romantic sex last time i was up there that he would think things were fine...nothing to worry about. I'm just sick of being used as a piece of meat. I want a guy to be able to look me in the EYES (not the boobs) and say "You are drop-dead georgous" but it never seems to play out that way....maybe it would if i didnt have boobs....who knows