True colours shining thru

[mrs_urahara]

Man, lately, i have been truly seeing the masks of my friends come flying off. I have, sadly, had to terminate 3 friendships in the past week. it's like a friendicide happening. MY problem is that I am a nice person. A really nice person. add to that, i have the attitude of "there is good in everyone".  I think this is why this chest congestion is

Comments

[neigehilde]

Don't let it let you down. And yes, I think you're right and there's good in everyone, just as there's bad in everyone, so it's not like those people are without any redeeming qualities -it's just that they obviously don't care about you enough to show them. And if not - who needs them anyway?=))
And yeah, people like the first one really do piss me off. I mean, I love meeting people and keeping in touch. We're all busy, but you can always find at least an hour to do smth you want to do - like getting together with friends and such. I also don't like when you call smb and propose to go someplace - and they just tell you "oo, sorry I'm busy." Heck, propose the alternative then. tell when you can. This kind of thing can really get on your nerves.

And yeah, the second person sure is strange. First, an internship placement is nothing big, Second, if she doesn't like the idea, a polite letter will do the trick usually. It's not like you were going to hunt her down or smth.

I'm not quite sure about the third one though, since I haven't read neither your sitcom, nor his criticism. Besides, even if he is just envious or unable to appreciate your work, it doesn't seem to me a very good reason to cut the ties with him entirely.
I mean, I tend to be rather destructive about others' creative work as well, but I don't really have any evil intentions. I just don't contend with lying about literature. It's not like I'm always way too honest. I can say to a friend that a dress looks "okay" on her and be supportive even if I don't like it very much, but she adores it to pieces. But that's because I believe that a person'a belief in their own attractiveness adds a whole new dimension to the said attractiveness. And if she likes herself, then everyone would like her too - so boosting confidence on those matters is a positive thing. A literary work is another thing altogether - it won't get any better just by praising it... So, I dunno. There's personal taste as well. It's complicated.

[mrs_urahara]

thanks for your support sweetie!*BIG HUGS!*

as far as the third person, his critique was not professional. you can "personally" not like something. Having friends who have been in the business longer, friends who have made movies for HBO, for Warner Independent, sony pictures classic and Focus features read his critism, ALL said: it was unprofessional and downright mean.

in my business, you have to be honest about a piece, because, you want to help the writer, tell them why it needs and where it needs work. As a writer, myself, this IS why i give my work to friends in the industry. i know they will not sugar coat it, they will tell me straight up what they did or did not like about it. they will be CONSTRUCTIVE. This third friend was not that at all. it was truly more like a an attack at my character.

and, you are right, you have never read it, so you cannot judge. absolutely true. I am, honestly, (please no offense here) a bit wary to give my work for people to read outside of the industry. You could read it to give a "thumbs up" or "thumbs down". But from a professional constructive critique. it would be harder. For instance, i could not truly critique a poem. I may be able to give it whether i like it or not, but i woud not be able to give a true literary opinion on it, you know what i mean?

now, that said, i have read some stuff that i, personally, HATE, BUT, i know the writing is GOOD, it's solid, and that it would sell. so, in the business of film/tv, it's a whole other breed of animal. seriously. it's nothing like literature, it's nothing like art, it's nothing like business. it's this mongrel of a beast that, one must get to know, understand, and eventually know how to tame and, in my case, make it new (here's to changing the entertainment industry *clings glass". I must be crazy. my friends think so. heehee)

but. i am not severing ties with him...it's more like our friendship is paired down. I cannot drop him, again, because my sister is still friendly with the family. and, i am very friendly with his wife. it will be more like, when i get together with him, i just won't look to him as a professional friend and comrade, the dynamics have changed.

things happen. life is a constant adventure. as you are having your new adventure in moscow. ^______~

again, thanks sooo much for even reading that huge ass babble. i think this is one of the few time i have bitched rant,but tis the season. heh-heh.

[neigehilde]

Oh, no, I can totally understand you=)))
Surely if the other professionals tell you he was just being mean and NOT constructive, you should just smile and stop showing him anything. And yes, professional criticism and a general "thumbs up" are different things, quite with you there=))
Don't be discouraged.

[mrs_urahara]

yeh, that is what was the real bummer, because, I was confused by his critique. i thought 'this sounds really harsh'. so, that's why i gave it to other professional friends who would tell me if i was just being a sensitive sillyheart or not. you know we creative types are the sensitives one. heehee

shoot, speaking of reading scripts...i have got to read the rewrites on the script i start pre-production on in january. GAH! ugh. i am so sef-absorbed right now. quite pathetic. ^^;;