Depersonalization
I had planned on changing my layout, reading posts, and posting this week.
But then IT happened.
I don't know when exactly the moment was when I began feeling like this, but it has taken over my life and my personality. It's been about a week and a half, and from what I've read, people have experienced it for years.
The problem is called depersonalization. It make me feel like I am in a dream and watching my life outside of my body. I don't feel connected anymore, and I lack very much emotion except for sadness because of it and fear that it will never end. It is the scariest thing I have ever felt, and it is what I felt when I was on pot that one night. That was a traumatic experience for me due to the fear it induced, and I believe that that is what is causing all of my problems.
I don't know how to get out of the feeling except not thinking about it. And this is pretty much impossible because the second I start thinking about it again, it comes back.
I'm afraid to go out. ANYWHERE. I can't even go to the dining hall because I'm so scared. I have been skipping classes because I'm so tired from taking Xanax that I can't get myself out of bed. And it doesn't even matter if I get out of bed or not because I am going to be miserable all day anyway.
I talked to a lot of people about this including my therapist, and no one seems to know the answer. Everyone cares about me, and worries, and I have a great support system, but this means nothing if I'm scared of life. I don't know what to do. I worry all the time anyway, and this just makes it worse.
I have been looking online for solutions and I found one from eHow. I am going to try to make it work. This is a process that apparently takes a long time. I really can't afford it taking a long time, so I am going to try to get rid of it as best as I can.
I have been trying to get depression medication, but there was a problem with it, so I've just been taking anti-anxiety medication so far.
I am so scared. And I feel like no one can help me.
But then IT happened.
I don't know when exactly the moment was when I began feeling like this, but it has taken over my life and my personality. It's been about a week and a half, and from what I've read, people have experienced it for years.
The problem is called depersonalization. It make me feel like I am in a dream and watching my life outside of my body. I don't feel connected anymore, and I lack very much emotion except for sadness because of it and fear that it will never end. It is the scariest thing I have ever felt, and it is what I felt when I was on pot that one night. That was a traumatic experience for me due to the fear it induced, and I believe that that is what is causing all of my problems.
I don't know how to get out of the feeling except not thinking about it. And this is pretty much impossible because the second I start thinking about it again, it comes back.
I'm afraid to go out. ANYWHERE. I can't even go to the dining hall because I'm so scared. I have been skipping classes because I'm so tired from taking Xanax that I can't get myself out of bed. And it doesn't even matter if I get out of bed or not because I am going to be miserable all day anyway.
I talked to a lot of people about this including my therapist, and no one seems to know the answer. Everyone cares about me, and worries, and I have a great support system, but this means nothing if I'm scared of life. I don't know what to do. I worry all the time anyway, and this just makes it worse.
I have been looking online for solutions and I found one from eHow. I am going to try to make it work. This is a process that apparently takes a long time. I really can't afford it taking a long time, so I am going to try to get rid of it as best as I can.
I have been trying to get depression medication, but there was a problem with it, so I've just been taking anti-anxiety medication so far.
I am so scared. And I feel like no one can help me.