We spent part of yesterday and today in Milwaukee, hanging out at the Hilton hotel. We were there to watch Ike, our friends Dave and Rebecca's son while they attended the wedding and reception of one of Dave's cousins (if I recollect correctly). With the exception of a brief meltdown when Ike realized his momma wasn't around, we had a good evening ( Read more... )

You know what's great about having a kid? They're inarguably genuine. In the first few years they have no ulterior motives. They like you, and they ask for nothing more than that you take care of them and like them back. They need you to survive, so even at their grouchiest or saddest, you know they're not trying to fake you out or coax you into ( Read more... )

Becoming a father has, naturally, increased my testosterone levels and right wing tendencies. I've decided that we need to pack up all the job-stealing Swedes in the neighborhood and send them back to Norway, and I've noticed a 10 percent uptick in child-foot-smelling preverts in the city. Immediate mass nose castration is required ( Read more... )

Der Kindlifresser


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As Nate's birth approaches, I've reflected on the person I've been, and the person I'm becoming. Soon another life will be brought into this world, instigated in no small part by myself. It makes one look inwardly and change slightly as one ponders becoming a nurturer of a young innocent. Yes, my friends, it's finally happened. I've changed for the ( Read more... )

* Slim Pickings for a Cheap Bastard-The Virgin store on Michigan Avenue is closing, and that's why everything in the place is currently 25 percent off. No surprise that the Virgins are no longer offering not-half-bad deals on DVDs and music (they had a $10 bin that allowed me to build up my schlock horror collection), and everything is priced up to ( Read more... )

mort ran an article on the vanguard of high-toned, abusive little S.O.B.s being raised in the UK ( Read more... )

"What we have here is a failure to communicate. Y'see, the boy gone and misbehaved, officer. An' when the boy misbehaves, he gone get an hour in th' box. Now if y'all excuse me, I have to get the shovel, so the boy can dig his dirt outta mah hole."Cracker Barrel. Ah, and he's a man of exquisite taste ( Read more... )

Mike and I always make time to read Modern Love in the Times' Sunday style section. This way we can start off our day with a tasty batch of rage at New York men and women who can't understand why dissolute, abusive, and selfish bastards make bad boy/girlfriends and husbands/wives, why they can't act 18 when they're 40, and the great emptiness they ( Read more... )