BPP0: Blueprint Paradigm Manifesto
http://blueprintparadigm.tumblr.com
I've recently reconnected with two of my ex-lovers, who have started a joint blog in which they explore relationships outside of the monogamist-hetero-normative (read: bass-ackwards) culture that us white middle classians find ourselves entrenched in. I find reading it probably the coolest thing in the world, since the three of us left each other eight years ago thinking we would never speak again.
In those eight years, I have been pretty strident in my adventures outside of typical relationships. It has been a long journey of building blueprints, building foundations, building paradigms, and then re-mapping everything half-way through the building process, so that I am left with a whole lot of plans and a patchwork skyscraper called my life.
I've been called back to the drawing board (so to speak) so many times that I worry that I may forget the mistakes I made last time.
It is in that spirit that I commit this blog as a chronicle of my foray(s) as an alternative-living activist, and a romantic human being. This will include (but may not be limited to) stories from my past, anecdotes about my personal love life, conversations I've had on the subject, questions and thoughts about sexuality, social progress, gender issues, and general love and well-being. Hopefully I will turn my judgement on myself as much as I do modern society, to find my pitfalls and bad habits as well as the strength and hope to continue. Hopefully I can learn from the past, and end my life in a nice penthouse suite on top of one funky building. Worst case scenario, someone else may find my blueprints and use them to build a patchwork skyscraper that is to their liking. As the saying goes, let the next guy know what killed you.
So who am I? My name is Xander, I'm a 25-year old low-middle-class white male who grew up in the Canadian suburbs and moved to Vancouver BC Canada, one of the most progressive cities in the world. I am an actor, musician, writer, and socialite, so I figured that I would thrive in the blissful and abundant liberality that this Utopian paradise held for me. I was wrong about this place. I've been shamed. I've been broken. But it makes me all the more proud that I am still here, that despite the rough go of it, being true to who I am is not only possible, but just as rewarding as it seemed when I was first introduced to the concept.
I'm Polyamorous. I'll get more into what that means (on a cultural level) and also what that means to me later (and I am sure the definition will redefine itself over time, as words are wont). The little summary at the top of the Wikipedia page for Polyamory is a (shockingly) good starting point for people unfamiliar with the term, or who confuse it for Mormonism.
I feel that if I do not contribute more material on this subject it may be eternally diluted by the protestations of its dwindling (though no less obnoxious) army of opponents.
Where non-fiction is concerned, I am occasionally told by well-intentioned people that I can be pedantic, arrogant, narcissistic, adjective-happy and prone to exaggeration and bouts of rose-coloured nostalgia. To that, I say, "Okay." As far as introductions go, I'd rather err on the side of 'pretentious smartass' rather than 'horny hillbilly.' I'll probably teeter-totter between those two extremes, if you can bear with me, we'll get along fine.
Names I suppose will have to change (I'm going to have to make an excel spreadsheet aren't I?) and I can't guarantee that I'll bring the microscopic honesty that I bring to my relationships to the page. I am, after all, telling stories. I find that people who blog about their hearts (self-bloggers? selfies?) tend to mythologize themselves over time. I'm not going to stand on ceremony, I intend to mythologize myself right off the bat! Hopefully it will make this a more enjoyable read, and hopefully you will take it with a grain of salt. My stories may have morals, they may be thematic, they may ask questions. Or they made be straight reporting. But that's new media. It's a mixed bag.
I'm calling this blog "Blueprint Paradigm" because it makes my mouth happy to say it. It will be an examination of my best-laid-plans, the moments of architectural disaster or accident, the precious moments of sustained equilibrium. The balancing act. The new normal. And those moments when theory and practice meet, when innovation is not the enemy of safety. Those are the best moments. Those moments give me hope.
Welcome to my patchwork skyscraper.
I've recently reconnected with two of my ex-lovers, who have started a joint blog in which they explore relationships outside of the monogamist-hetero-normative (read: bass-ackwards) culture that us white middle classians find ourselves entrenched in. I find reading it probably the coolest thing in the world, since the three of us left each other eight years ago thinking we would never speak again.
In those eight years, I have been pretty strident in my adventures outside of typical relationships. It has been a long journey of building blueprints, building foundations, building paradigms, and then re-mapping everything half-way through the building process, so that I am left with a whole lot of plans and a patchwork skyscraper called my life.
I've been called back to the drawing board (so to speak) so many times that I worry that I may forget the mistakes I made last time.
It is in that spirit that I commit this blog as a chronicle of my foray(s) as an alternative-living activist, and a romantic human being. This will include (but may not be limited to) stories from my past, anecdotes about my personal love life, conversations I've had on the subject, questions and thoughts about sexuality, social progress, gender issues, and general love and well-being. Hopefully I will turn my judgement on myself as much as I do modern society, to find my pitfalls and bad habits as well as the strength and hope to continue. Hopefully I can learn from the past, and end my life in a nice penthouse suite on top of one funky building. Worst case scenario, someone else may find my blueprints and use them to build a patchwork skyscraper that is to their liking. As the saying goes, let the next guy know what killed you.
So who am I? My name is Xander, I'm a 25-year old low-middle-class white male who grew up in the Canadian suburbs and moved to Vancouver BC Canada, one of the most progressive cities in the world. I am an actor, musician, writer, and socialite, so I figured that I would thrive in the blissful and abundant liberality that this Utopian paradise held for me. I was wrong about this place. I've been shamed. I've been broken. But it makes me all the more proud that I am still here, that despite the rough go of it, being true to who I am is not only possible, but just as rewarding as it seemed when I was first introduced to the concept.
I'm Polyamorous. I'll get more into what that means (on a cultural level) and also what that means to me later (and I am sure the definition will redefine itself over time, as words are wont). The little summary at the top of the Wikipedia page for Polyamory is a (shockingly) good starting point for people unfamiliar with the term, or who confuse it for Mormonism.
I feel that if I do not contribute more material on this subject it may be eternally diluted by the protestations of its dwindling (though no less obnoxious) army of opponents.
Where non-fiction is concerned, I am occasionally told by well-intentioned people that I can be pedantic, arrogant, narcissistic, adjective-happy and prone to exaggeration and bouts of rose-coloured nostalgia. To that, I say, "Okay." As far as introductions go, I'd rather err on the side of 'pretentious smartass' rather than 'horny hillbilly.' I'll probably teeter-totter between those two extremes, if you can bear with me, we'll get along fine.
Names I suppose will have to change (I'm going to have to make an excel spreadsheet aren't I?) and I can't guarantee that I'll bring the microscopic honesty that I bring to my relationships to the page. I am, after all, telling stories. I find that people who blog about their hearts (self-bloggers? selfies?) tend to mythologize themselves over time. I'm not going to stand on ceremony, I intend to mythologize myself right off the bat! Hopefully it will make this a more enjoyable read, and hopefully you will take it with a grain of salt. My stories may have morals, they may be thematic, they may ask questions. Or they made be straight reporting. But that's new media. It's a mixed bag.
I'm calling this blog "Blueprint Paradigm" because it makes my mouth happy to say it. It will be an examination of my best-laid-plans, the moments of architectural disaster or accident, the precious moments of sustained equilibrium. The balancing act. The new normal. And those moments when theory and practice meet, when innovation is not the enemy of safety. Those are the best moments. Those moments give me hope.
Welcome to my patchwork skyscraper.