(no subject)
So...the goodbye was hard. All day Thursday I kept thinking about it and when it was time for Magnet Kingdom I thought he wasn't there, and I started flipping out. But as I was walking into the room I was supposed to be in, he came up behind me and gave me a hug, so I was happy (and sad). He knew I was going to be upset, so I think he was extra sweet to me. We took alotta pics together and spent all of the 2 1/2 hours together, but it wasn't enough. I've really grown to know and love him over the school year, and that kid is really important to me. He totally has a special place in my heart forever. It's kinda weird, that he's only 12 years old, but I feel more close to him, then friends I have that are my own age. When it was time to put him on the bus, I got really upset and we hugged for a long time. Amber said it looked like it was my boyfriend going off to war or something. And he kept saying, "It's okay Marissa, we'll see each other again, I promise". I know he was sad too. I gave him my number so we could keep in touch, so I hope he calls me from time to time. He's going to Puerto Rico for the whole summer.... I miss him and love him so much, and I really hope he never forgets me.
I just feel like so much stuff is changing, and has changed lately - and I think it's starting to hit me now. As much as those kids annoy me to no end that I work with everyday, I love them with all I've got, and it's crazy to think the end of the year is here, and that I might not be back next year. I can't say goodbye to them. It's hard to let them go, but I've never done well with goodbye's.
It's crazy how one day you think you're life is going one way, and then one situation, incident, word, or feeling..can change it...completely...and then your totally lost. You start second guessing everything, and everyone. People that you once believed in and trusted you are now questioning..and people start acting different. It feels like you used to all be on the same page..and now you're still on that page...and everyone else has moved onto another chapter...without letting you know.
I feel like things in my life just keep happening....something new...every day..and it's moving so fast that I really don't have time to catch up...so it just keeps piling up ontop of me...and I really dono what to try and take care of first...I know I'm not the only one that feels this way, and I'm not trying to look for sympathy at all..I'm just tryin' to say that it sucks...it really really sucks.
It just sucks when you think you know someone, and then stuff happens, and everything changes...people seem different, distant, and you just feel like you don't know them anymore. I'm not gonna sit here and name names, because if you're really friends...it's probably felt on both ends. And there's definatley more than one....I miss you.
I miss all my friends to be honest, because lately it doesn't feel like people have been acting the same.
I find it harder and harder every day to trust people...and it scares me.
"I was the one who said things changed, but you were the one who showed me exactly how much they really did"
XoXo Maris <3
I just feel like so much stuff is changing, and has changed lately - and I think it's starting to hit me now. As much as those kids annoy me to no end that I work with everyday, I love them with all I've got, and it's crazy to think the end of the year is here, and that I might not be back next year. I can't say goodbye to them. It's hard to let them go, but I've never done well with goodbye's.
It's crazy how one day you think you're life is going one way, and then one situation, incident, word, or feeling..can change it...completely...and then your totally lost. You start second guessing everything, and everyone. People that you once believed in and trusted you are now questioning..and people start acting different. It feels like you used to all be on the same page..and now you're still on that page...and everyone else has moved onto another chapter...without letting you know.
I feel like things in my life just keep happening....something new...every day..and it's moving so fast that I really don't have time to catch up...so it just keeps piling up ontop of me...and I really dono what to try and take care of first...I know I'm not the only one that feels this way, and I'm not trying to look for sympathy at all..I'm just tryin' to say that it sucks...it really really sucks.
It just sucks when you think you know someone, and then stuff happens, and everything changes...people seem different, distant, and you just feel like you don't know them anymore. I'm not gonna sit here and name names, because if you're really friends...it's probably felt on both ends. And there's definatley more than one....I miss you.
I miss all my friends to be honest, because lately it doesn't feel like people have been acting the same.
I find it harder and harder every day to trust people...and it scares me.
"I was the one who said things changed, but you were the one who showed me exactly how much they really did"
XoXo Maris <3