It's been a long time..(WARNING: Don't read if you don't wanna listen to me bitch)....
Artist: Christina Aguilera
Album: Stripped
Title: Cruz
I'm leaving today
Living it
Leaving it
To change
Slowly drifting
Into a peaceful breeze
Tongue tied and twisted
Are all my memories
Celebrating a fantasy come true
Packing all my bags
Finally on the move
I'm leaving today
I'm living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change
As I'm driving
I'm captured by the view
So much beauty
The road becomes my muse
The heat is rising
And my hand surfs through the wind
Cool, calm, collected
Is the child that lies within
See I'm leaving today
I'm living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change, oh yeah
See I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change
But somehow I miss it
I think I'll really miss it
One day, ohh
I turn up the radio
And I'm feeling like I've never felt before
Turn down the memories of
Yesteryears and broken dreams and i'm free
Finally free, ooh
Slowly drifting
Into a peaceful breeze, oh
Ohh
Ooh yeah
I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it, oh yeah
Leaving it to change
To change, oh no
See I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it, living it
Leaving it, leaving
To change
Ohh oh
I'm leaving today
Oh I'm living it
I'm leaving it to change
Living it, to change
Leaving it
To change
Ooh, oh yeah
Living it, leaving it
Said I'm living it
I'm leaving it
Living it, leaving it
To change
I'm leaving it to change
But somehow I miss it
I think I'll really miss it
One day, yeah
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Wow, I really haven't updated in a long ass time. Mainly because I have nothing exciting to talk about, and everything that is going on in my life - is not positive. I guess I am mainly writing this entry so I can get things off my chest for myself, so like I said in the "subject" - don't read it if you don't wanna hear me bitch....
I guess it would just be easier to make a list of the things I'm feeling...so here we go...
1. Today is the ONE YEAR anniversary of the day we left last summer for our Cross Country trip. (which is the reason for the song I put in my entry). Right now I should be in Canada, starting my 7 1/2 week journey with Ambino. It really makes me so sad, because those were the best weeks of my life, and to think about where I am now..a year later...makes me wanna crawl under a rock forever. I could go on about this forever..but I'll stop there..
2. I have to work 7 days straight this week. The first time I've done that..in my life. I worked all week 8:30-5:30 (and one day til 7) at the school, and at Magnet Kindgom. Then this weekend I have to work at Waterford Country School from 3-11pm on Saturday and Sunday. I can do it, it just adds to the madness.
3. Speaking of working..I got laid off from the Magnet School. HOT!! All the IA's got laid off, so next September I have no job. So that's just great. Exactly what I wanna do, try and find another job. They are hiring back SOME IA's which will be full time/benefit's, so I'm hoping to God I get one of those. But who knows, with my luck.,..prob not. I applied to the Friendship School but haven't heard anything back. Waterford Country School offered me a full time job, but I haven't even really started officially as a "Call-In", so I said I wanted to see what it was all about first. It would be alot easier if I got the job at the Magnet School, cuz it'll be full time, with benefits, I know the school/routine, and the staff, and I'll getta hell of a pay raise..so I'm hoping. It's just added stress..
4. The fact that I'm even LOOKING for a Job for next September shouldn't even be happening...but since I didn't get into ANY Grad Schools whatsoever....and that alone, is a horrible feeling. I mean, I really busted my ass in undergrad school. I practically had a 4.0. I did it all because I had such high hopes for myself, to get into Grad School. And I really cannot believe I didn't get accepted anywhere. I should of had more fun in school while I had the time, cuz I never knew it'd turn out this way. I know I can try again, and I'm going too. It just makes me feel like a failure, and that's one of the worst feelings...
5. I won't even get INTO the fact that all guys are complete assholes and all they want is one thing. That would take up the rest of my life to write about....ha...don't even get me fuckin' started...
6. Not to mention a few other problems that I am trying to cope with and deal with, that I'm def. not about to write about in my journal....
*What I have learned...is not to trust anyone. It's true that you can't trust anyone but yourself......Always remember that*
It just seems like I always get the shit. I feel like I am always dealt the bad hand. I dono why God thinks I am such a bad person...I always used to say..."Whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger".......but what if it does kill you??
XoXo Maris <3
Album: Stripped
Title: Cruz
I'm leaving today
Living it
Leaving it
To change
Slowly drifting
Into a peaceful breeze
Tongue tied and twisted
Are all my memories
Celebrating a fantasy come true
Packing all my bags
Finally on the move
I'm leaving today
I'm living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change
As I'm driving
I'm captured by the view
So much beauty
The road becomes my muse
The heat is rising
And my hand surfs through the wind
Cool, calm, collected
Is the child that lies within
See I'm leaving today
I'm living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change, oh yeah
See I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it
Oh I'm leaving it
To change
But somehow I miss it
I think I'll really miss it
One day, ohh
I turn up the radio
And I'm feeling like I've never felt before
Turn down the memories of
Yesteryears and broken dreams and i'm free
Finally free, ooh
Slowly drifting
Into a peaceful breeze, oh
Ohh
Ooh yeah
I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it, oh yeah
Leaving it to change
To change, oh no
See I'm leaving today, oh yes I'm
Living it, living it
Leaving it, leaving
To change
Ohh oh
I'm leaving today
Oh I'm living it
I'm leaving it to change
Living it, to change
Leaving it
To change
Ooh, oh yeah
Living it, leaving it
Said I'm living it
I'm leaving it
Living it, leaving it
To change
I'm leaving it to change
But somehow I miss it
I think I'll really miss it
One day, yeah
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Wow, I really haven't updated in a long ass time. Mainly because I have nothing exciting to talk about, and everything that is going on in my life - is not positive. I guess I am mainly writing this entry so I can get things off my chest for myself, so like I said in the "subject" - don't read it if you don't wanna hear me bitch....
I guess it would just be easier to make a list of the things I'm feeling...so here we go...
1. Today is the ONE YEAR anniversary of the day we left last summer for our Cross Country trip. (which is the reason for the song I put in my entry). Right now I should be in Canada, starting my 7 1/2 week journey with Ambino. It really makes me so sad, because those were the best weeks of my life, and to think about where I am now..a year later...makes me wanna crawl under a rock forever. I could go on about this forever..but I'll stop there..
2. I have to work 7 days straight this week. The first time I've done that..in my life. I worked all week 8:30-5:30 (and one day til 7) at the school, and at Magnet Kindgom. Then this weekend I have to work at Waterford Country School from 3-11pm on Saturday and Sunday. I can do it, it just adds to the madness.
3. Speaking of working..I got laid off from the Magnet School. HOT!! All the IA's got laid off, so next September I have no job. So that's just great. Exactly what I wanna do, try and find another job. They are hiring back SOME IA's which will be full time/benefit's, so I'm hoping to God I get one of those. But who knows, with my luck.,..prob not. I applied to the Friendship School but haven't heard anything back. Waterford Country School offered me a full time job, but I haven't even really started officially as a "Call-In", so I said I wanted to see what it was all about first. It would be alot easier if I got the job at the Magnet School, cuz it'll be full time, with benefits, I know the school/routine, and the staff, and I'll getta hell of a pay raise..so I'm hoping. It's just added stress..
4. The fact that I'm even LOOKING for a Job for next September shouldn't even be happening...but since I didn't get into ANY Grad Schools whatsoever....and that alone, is a horrible feeling. I mean, I really busted my ass in undergrad school. I practically had a 4.0. I did it all because I had such high hopes for myself, to get into Grad School. And I really cannot believe I didn't get accepted anywhere. I should of had more fun in school while I had the time, cuz I never knew it'd turn out this way. I know I can try again, and I'm going too. It just makes me feel like a failure, and that's one of the worst feelings...
5. I won't even get INTO the fact that all guys are complete assholes and all they want is one thing. That would take up the rest of my life to write about....ha...don't even get me fuckin' started...
6. Not to mention a few other problems that I am trying to cope with and deal with, that I'm def. not about to write about in my journal....
*What I have learned...is not to trust anyone. It's true that you can't trust anyone but yourself......Always remember that*
It just seems like I always get the shit. I feel like I am always dealt the bad hand. I dono why God thinks I am such a bad person...I always used to say..."Whatever doesn't kill you, only makes you stronger".......but what if it does kill you??
XoXo Maris <3