Messy Break-Ups
On Saturday night I went out with my friend, Brad. But before we spent the night on the town I headed to his apartment and helped him throw out pretty much every memory he ever had that was related to his boyfriend. The two of them are officially over and he wanted every reminder out of his life. Their break-up was messy. This guy was an asshole to him and used him in every possible way. I'm glad that Brad is moving on and isn't trying to crawl back to him.
But it got me thinking. It's truly amazing how differently people deal with break-ups. I'm the sentimental type. I keep pretty much everything. I still have little projects I did when I was in kindergarden. I still have letters that I passed to friends during class in high school. I keep all my pictures of boyfriends and friends who have come and gone, no matter how I felt about them when I last talked to them.
I actually tried to convince Brad to keep a few things to remind him of his ex (and he did) but he pretty much got rid of everything. It made me sad to think he lost a year of his life on this guy, but I'm a firm believer that every relationship teaches us something about ourselves and the type of person we want to end up with. I understand Brad's anger at this stage, but the reason I tried to convince him to keep a couple of items is because, once the anger has subsided, sometimes it's nice to look back and remember the good things that you loved about the person. Was that the right thing to suggest to him? I'm pretty positive it is because it's worked for me in the past.
But, yeah, the whole point of this post is basically that it never ceases to amaze me how different one person is from the next. You can have different views and opinions, but in the end we all end up hurt at some point. It's just something interesting to think about. Therefore, I'm doing the best I can helping Brad get through this, but ultimately, the whole healing process is up to him. There is only so much that I can do.
Are any of you like me? Like keeping little things around that remind you of someone, no matter how much they hurt or angered you in the past?
But it got me thinking. It's truly amazing how differently people deal with break-ups. I'm the sentimental type. I keep pretty much everything. I still have little projects I did when I was in kindergarden. I still have letters that I passed to friends during class in high school. I keep all my pictures of boyfriends and friends who have come and gone, no matter how I felt about them when I last talked to them.
I actually tried to convince Brad to keep a few things to remind him of his ex (and he did) but he pretty much got rid of everything. It made me sad to think he lost a year of his life on this guy, but I'm a firm believer that every relationship teaches us something about ourselves and the type of person we want to end up with. I understand Brad's anger at this stage, but the reason I tried to convince him to keep a couple of items is because, once the anger has subsided, sometimes it's nice to look back and remember the good things that you loved about the person. Was that the right thing to suggest to him? I'm pretty positive it is because it's worked for me in the past.
But, yeah, the whole point of this post is basically that it never ceases to amaze me how different one person is from the next. You can have different views and opinions, but in the end we all end up hurt at some point. It's just something interesting to think about. Therefore, I'm doing the best I can helping Brad get through this, but ultimately, the whole healing process is up to him. There is only so much that I can do.
Are any of you like me? Like keeping little things around that remind you of someone, no matter how much they hurt or angered you in the past?