A whole new world...
For some reason, I never bothered to learn text formatting until just this very moment. It's 7am, I'm at work and bored, but oh, what a glorious world of options I've just discovered!
For example, having acquired the ability to bold words, my journal entries will soon take on a whole new dimension of emotional depth. From surly, to surly but with a tangible sense of urgency with but a few simple key strokes. Here is a practical application of this technique using an event from last Friday:
So I went to my first digital art class on Friday. The instructor informed us that we're going to need two text books, along with the two accompanying CD's. I was like "Sir, you are also going to need two CD's. You're going to need 'TO SEE DEEZ' NUTZ! SPLADOW!"
You see that? That whole passage just took on a previously unfelt sense of gravitas! That shit is hard-core! Oh shit, I done did it again!
I've also mastered the art of italicization. This could be useful to illustrate my interior monologue. Peep this:
I need to walk to the gas station to buy cigarettes, but I'm a lazy ass, so I'll probably just stay here and look at porn on the internet. And yet, it is neither lethargy nor libido which binds me, rather, it is the unseasonable chill to the air. Could it be that this is a foretell of ominous times? May Lady Death at long last be putting an end to this wicked game, poised to wrap her icy fingers around my forlorn heart? I know not whether to rejoice or despair. Fuck it, I'll just bum one of that dude in the Hilfiger jacket. For he is my muse!
That was amazing. Though, perhaps it would be better for flash back situations, illustrating events passed:
On the Moors of Scotland rose a terrible beast, it's belly full on the sins of man. But I couldn't be bothered with that shit, cuz I was stuck on level 2 of Metroid. You know that one part where you have to, like, use the jump boots to reach that really high platform with the missle expansion on it, but at the same time you're being attacked by all these Space Pirates and other assholes? That shit is ridiculous.
Oh hell yes. If the english language were a martial art, bold would be my Tiger Style and italics would be my Crane Technique. I'd be a ninja of insurmountable power, with literacy as my katana and diction as my shuriken.
But wait, there's more! I can now edit font colors. That will be totally kick ass for demonstrating the constant inner struggle between myself and The Hulk:
Man, Reese's Pieces are seriously the best candy ever made. PUNY HUMAN, HULK NO WANT REESE'S PIECES! HULK WANT M&M'S! HULK SMASH FRAIL DIAMOND IF HULK NOT GET M&M'S CHOCOLATE, BITE SIZED CANDY! No Hulk, I won't let you push me around this time! I'm in charge of our body now! RAAARGH! YOU MAKE HULK ANGRY! HULK DESTROY YOU! Why eat such nutrionless nonsense when in less than a half hour we can enjoy my frozen pizza that tastes just as good as anything you'd find in a restaurant! Then, we fly like Valkyries, unleashing hell from the skies as we lay waste to France and scorch it's earth! RED BARON?! WHAT YOU DOING IN HULK/TODD PSYCHE?! I want both of you out of my mind at once! This lame joke is destroying my already fragile mental state! FAG. Fag.
Blagh, that's enough of this nonsense. Stuff seems more entertaining when it's 7am and you're operating on 3 hours of sleep. I've quickly lost all interest in typing any more fucking html tags so, fuck it, I quit. As soon as something interesting happens in my life, I'll be sure to bury this shit with a "real" entry asap.
For example, having acquired the ability to bold words, my journal entries will soon take on a whole new dimension of emotional depth. From surly, to surly but with a tangible sense of urgency with but a few simple key strokes. Here is a practical application of this technique using an event from last Friday:
So I went to my first digital art class on Friday. The instructor informed us that we're going to need two text books, along with the two accompanying CD's. I was like "Sir, you are also going to need two CD's. You're going to need 'TO SEE DEEZ' NUTZ! SPLADOW!"
You see that? That whole passage just took on a previously unfelt sense of gravitas! That shit is hard-core! Oh shit, I done did it again!
I've also mastered the art of italicization. This could be useful to illustrate my interior monologue. Peep this:
I need to walk to the gas station to buy cigarettes, but I'm a lazy ass, so I'll probably just stay here and look at porn on the internet. And yet, it is neither lethargy nor libido which binds me, rather, it is the unseasonable chill to the air. Could it be that this is a foretell of ominous times? May Lady Death at long last be putting an end to this wicked game, poised to wrap her icy fingers around my forlorn heart? I know not whether to rejoice or despair. Fuck it, I'll just bum one of that dude in the Hilfiger jacket. For he is my muse!
That was amazing. Though, perhaps it would be better for flash back situations, illustrating events passed:
On the Moors of Scotland rose a terrible beast, it's belly full on the sins of man. But I couldn't be bothered with that shit, cuz I was stuck on level 2 of Metroid. You know that one part where you have to, like, use the jump boots to reach that really high platform with the missle expansion on it, but at the same time you're being attacked by all these Space Pirates and other assholes? That shit is ridiculous.
Oh hell yes. If the english language were a martial art, bold would be my Tiger Style and italics would be my Crane Technique. I'd be a ninja of insurmountable power, with literacy as my katana and diction as my shuriken.
But wait, there's more! I can now edit font colors. That will be totally kick ass for demonstrating the constant inner struggle between myself and The Hulk:
Man, Reese's Pieces are seriously the best candy ever made. PUNY HUMAN, HULK NO WANT REESE'S PIECES! HULK WANT M&M'S! HULK SMASH FRAIL DIAMOND IF HULK NOT GET M&M'S CHOCOLATE, BITE SIZED CANDY! No Hulk, I won't let you push me around this time! I'm in charge of our body now! RAAARGH! YOU MAKE HULK ANGRY! HULK DESTROY YOU! Why eat such nutrionless nonsense when in less than a half hour we can enjoy my frozen pizza that tastes just as good as anything you'd find in a restaurant! Then, we fly like Valkyries, unleashing hell from the skies as we lay waste to France and scorch it's earth! RED BARON?! WHAT YOU DOING IN HULK/TODD PSYCHE?! I want both of you out of my mind at once! This lame joke is destroying my already fragile mental state! FAG. Fag.
Blagh, that's enough of this nonsense. Stuff seems more entertaining when it's 7am and you're operating on 3 hours of sleep. I've quickly lost all interest in typing any more fucking html tags so, fuck it, I quit. As soon as something interesting happens in my life, I'll be sure to bury this shit with a "real" entry asap.