One Big Fucking Cosmic Joke
Have your ever had the feeing that an event changing entity was fucking with you for the pure enjoyment of it?
Well I have. Where do I start? Well, I get a new job. Dialamerica, right, not feeling to hot about myself b/c I'll be selling mags to old people who don't realize what they've purchased but I need the money so that I can move out at the beginning of the year. Well, after picking up Isis from my friend Beth's house (she offered to watch Isis since this is a 9-2 job) I get into an accident. Totally my fault. I was lost and trying to find I-65. Not thinking I made a left hand turn w/o making sure it was clear. An off duty cop hits me. I'm ok and so is Isis. She was more pissed that I wouldn't take her out of the carseat. The lady officer was ok too. Well I call my dad so he can pick us up b/c I didn't feel comfortable driving the car since I'm no machanic. Well, he bitches that he has had no sleep. I call Amie and she comes to my rescue. Getting home my parents precede to ask me how I could do such a thing. BTW I'm two hours running late for work. After they finish berating me, Amie takes me to work. I have a way stressful day at work. I ask Scott to give me a ride home. Well on the way home I burst into tears. Anyone who knows me, knows I hate to cry. There are few people I feel comfortable crying around, so you can imagine my horror when I was unable to keep myself calm. Well you know what the bastard did. He held me. The sweet jerk held me closed and stroked my hair until the sobs went away. I went to bed feeling shitty. Well, the next day I call the insurance company to file a claim only to discover that between doc visits and chemo, I forgot to make my last payment. Then two days later waiting for the estimation for the lady officers car (which is 2340.00) I learn my car is undrivable. Then my parent's proclaim that if I'm to stay in the house I have to give them all my bills, paycheck, & checkbook. My question is this: Why? What have I done? What bad karma am I putting out if someone knows, tell me. I want to be a good person so if I'm lacking in an area tell me so I am able to improve.
Well I have. Where do I start? Well, I get a new job. Dialamerica, right, not feeling to hot about myself b/c I'll be selling mags to old people who don't realize what they've purchased but I need the money so that I can move out at the beginning of the year. Well, after picking up Isis from my friend Beth's house (she offered to watch Isis since this is a 9-2 job) I get into an accident. Totally my fault. I was lost and trying to find I-65. Not thinking I made a left hand turn w/o making sure it was clear. An off duty cop hits me. I'm ok and so is Isis. She was more pissed that I wouldn't take her out of the carseat. The lady officer was ok too. Well I call my dad so he can pick us up b/c I didn't feel comfortable driving the car since I'm no machanic. Well, he bitches that he has had no sleep. I call Amie and she comes to my rescue. Getting home my parents precede to ask me how I could do such a thing. BTW I'm two hours running late for work. After they finish berating me, Amie takes me to work. I have a way stressful day at work. I ask Scott to give me a ride home. Well on the way home I burst into tears. Anyone who knows me, knows I hate to cry. There are few people I feel comfortable crying around, so you can imagine my horror when I was unable to keep myself calm. Well you know what the bastard did. He held me. The sweet jerk held me closed and stroked my hair until the sobs went away. I went to bed feeling shitty. Well, the next day I call the insurance company to file a claim only to discover that between doc visits and chemo, I forgot to make my last payment. Then two days later waiting for the estimation for the lady officers car (which is 2340.00) I learn my car is undrivable. Then my parent's proclaim that if I'm to stay in the house I have to give them all my bills, paycheck, & checkbook. My question is this: Why? What have I done? What bad karma am I putting out if someone knows, tell me. I want to be a good person so if I'm lacking in an area tell me so I am able to improve.