Where to go? When to stop?
I always mean to update. Haven't I been starting a lot of posts the same way lately?
Anyway, to be proper, let's rewind back to Saturday, June 20, when I attended my last wedding for the summer (I hope).
Lovely day -- the drive up to Grand Rapids only took me two and a half hours (I guess I was going fast?), and since I'd left four hours before the wedding, I had plenty of time to spare. I parked in the church lot, which was adjacent to a school/baseball field and a nice wooded area, and just watched the "summer snow" -- those puffy seeds from cottonwood trees -- float by. There was a lot of it in the air, and it was a warm, clear summer day; perfect for a wedding.
I met a few people from the Chimes staff that I was glad to see again -- as well as a few people not from the staff who I hadn't expected to ever see again -- and had an OK time at the reception. It had a movie theme, with each table labeled with a title instead of a number (mine was X-Men 2) and OST music played in the background. Instead of having guests clink their glasses in order to make the couple kiss (which is an annoying practice, if you ask me), the bride and groom requested haikus. These ranged from cute and charming to ridiculous and eyebrow-raising. It was a fun idea, though.
Hmm, what's the next event worth mentioning?
Ah, a week ago today (so, last week Wednesday) I tagged along with yaminokaitou and her uncle to Lincoln Park Zoo. It was a very, very hot and humid day, but we had fun at the exhibits (even if the animals all looked how we felt -- overheated) as well as the nearby botanical gardens, and we had managed to see everything except for the monkey house when the sky turned dark and the lightning started ^^; (So, yes, we left then, as did everyone else.) I might post some pictures later -- I've already uploaded them to photobucket, so all that's left is linking and commentary (but obviously I haven't gotten to it yet ...).
Along with the zoo, I hung out at Traci's house and we played some Vesperia. More correctly, *I* played some Vesperia, which was nice since I'd only seen the very beginning and the very end of the game to that point, hehe. Now I've played the first 10 or 15 (lost track ...) hours, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. The story doesn't have as much of a hook as other Tales games I've played ("Hay guys, let's go find the blonde dude for some reason that I won't tell you!"), but I love Yuri as a main character (♥ ♥ ♥) and the theme of struggle between the classes could become fairly interesting too. The only character I really didn't care for was Rita (she's kind of bitchy, in my opinion). Yeah, I'm not bothered by Estelle. I guess that makes ... one of us, heh. (Also, I ♥ Repede, but who doesn't? XD) I also enjoyed the combat system (I mean, it is a Tales game -- this is pretty much a given), and ... I really like the graphics style, more than I expected to.
Not like I'm going to rush out and buy an Xbox any time soon, but if I had one, I would definitely pick up Vesperia. (... This goes for any Tales game out in English for a system I have, of course ...)
Let's see ... last Sunday was my graduation party. It was fine; lots of children somehow related to me screaming and jumping on my water bed and chasing the dog, but you know, they're family. It was nice to see some relatives that I haven't seen in a while, though I mostly stuck to hanging out with friends since there were fewer of them than relatives -- I figured I could let the relatives entertain each other while I entertained the friends. I have a lot of relatives -- parties like this remind me of that (and not all of them were there, either). My elderly (94?!) grandpa came. He mostly stays in his house these days -- my mom does grocery shopping for him even. He looks so frail now ... I've felt a bit guilty since I haven't gone to see him at all since I've gotten home from school, so I'm glad he was there. I really am becoming a hikikomori ...
Speaking of the party, I need to write a lot of thank you cards. Even though our invitations said guests didn't need to bring presents (in not so many words), a lot of them did. I'm certainly grateful, though such generosity always makes me a bit uncomfortable for some reason -- perhaps I feel that graduating college isn't that big a deal, and I'm letting people down because of my current state of NEET-hood. I know I could be trying harder to find a job -- not that I'm not trying at all, but I'm sure I could do more. I just feel ... clueless. I don't even know what I want any more, and that's been plaguing me for months. "I want to be a writer" -- that was something I could have said easily in the past, but now ... I just feel like a talentless hack with no good ideas. I know that real writers don't wait for inspiration to do their writing. I'm having trouble, though.
Editing too ... I hate this lack of certainty. People say they go to college to figure out what they want to do, but I haven't figured it out yet. I don't know if I ever will. So the thought lurks in the back of my mind: "Was it a waste for you to go to college?" Perhaps it was just my own selfishness ... I'm afraid that's the case.
I'm a very selfish person ...
And overly negative about myself. But anyway. "Life is an adventure, and God has a plan." I will keep repeating this sentence to myself until life makes sense again -- if ever that should happen.
With a lack of much else to do (I know, I could be doing more), I've been investing myself in various forms of entertainment lately. I picked up on a file of Tales of Eternia (U.S.: Tales of Destiny II) that was more than halfway through (maybe three-quarters of the way?) and played it up until the final dungeon. There are a lot of revelations about the characters that I had completely forgotten and some extra stuff that I hadn't done in my first game, so it was fun to play it again. I suppose I'll finish out the game too, since I'm so close now. I remember liking the ending a lot anyway -- cute couples always get me.
I read the first 7 or 8 volumes of a manga called Bara no Tame ni (For the Roses) about a chubby, unattractive girl who finds out she's the daughter of a beautiful movie star and goes to live with her gorgeous half-siblings. Yeah, it's one of those weird, "Is this relationship incestuous yet?" series (because of course they're not *really* related somehow ... right? Right?!). I suppose the drama made it easy to read, because I just kept going despite my groans of, "Um, sure, like that would happen" and the squickiness of pseudo-incest. Certainly not as good (or mature) as some of the other josei manga I've read; other than the heroine's age (18 at the start), there was really nothing that distinguished it from ye olde melodramatic shoujo starring high school girls. Oh, but the heroine's supposed to be unattractive! Hmm, I thought I might be able to relate to her because of that, but no, of course several hot guys fall for her anyway (because they find her unattractiveness adorable, I guess). Oh, well.
Caught up to Pandora Hearts today -- stopped at ep. 13. Still somewhat interesting as far as the plot goes, and the characters are a whole lot of fun. It's not particularly "deep" or anything, but ...
I'm thinking of trying out a few older series (I blame it on Traci ^^). I've downloaded the first few episodes of Daddy Long Legs (enjoyed the novel a few years back) and Kaikan Phrase (mmm, pulpy! And 100% less sex than I've heard the manga has). Yes, very random.
I also got past the episode of utter weirdness (with the paper cutouts instead of animation) in His and Her Circumstances (aka Kare Kano). Was this the series that Hideaki Anno had a breakdown during? I think I've hear rumors suggesting that (though some say he had a breakdown during Eva instead ...), and it wouldn't surprise me. I'm not sure if I want to finish re-watching the series or not ... at least this time I know what happens beyond the end, thanks to the manga.
Fourth of July weekend will soon be here ... not sure yet what I'll be doing. My parents will be out of the house until Saturday, and I haven't decided yet if I want to join them and their friends for fireworks at least. My other option is just hanging out by myself. I don't mind being alone, but ... Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays because of fireworks, so I hate to miss a good show of them, even if it requires me to awkwardly hang out with my parents' friends.
So much rambling ... this point in my life is such a strange one. I told my mom the other day that I've come to the end of my rope, and I need to find a new one to grab hold of -- education was one rope that I'd been climbing for years, but there's none left now. I don't know what to do. Maybe everyone goes through this, and I'm just slow in resolving my issues and moving on to adulthood ...
I was paging through my high school yearbook yesterday, and I couldn't help but wonder where all my classmates have ended up. I wonder where I will end up ... ?
Anyway, to be proper, let's rewind back to Saturday, June 20, when I attended my last wedding for the summer (I hope).
Lovely day -- the drive up to Grand Rapids only took me two and a half hours (I guess I was going fast?), and since I'd left four hours before the wedding, I had plenty of time to spare. I parked in the church lot, which was adjacent to a school/baseball field and a nice wooded area, and just watched the "summer snow" -- those puffy seeds from cottonwood trees -- float by. There was a lot of it in the air, and it was a warm, clear summer day; perfect for a wedding.
I met a few people from the Chimes staff that I was glad to see again -- as well as a few people not from the staff who I hadn't expected to ever see again -- and had an OK time at the reception. It had a movie theme, with each table labeled with a title instead of a number (mine was X-Men 2) and OST music played in the background. Instead of having guests clink their glasses in order to make the couple kiss (which is an annoying practice, if you ask me), the bride and groom requested haikus. These ranged from cute and charming to ridiculous and eyebrow-raising. It was a fun idea, though.
Hmm, what's the next event worth mentioning?
Ah, a week ago today (so, last week Wednesday) I tagged along with yaminokaitou and her uncle to Lincoln Park Zoo. It was a very, very hot and humid day, but we had fun at the exhibits (even if the animals all looked how we felt -- overheated) as well as the nearby botanical gardens, and we had managed to see everything except for the monkey house when the sky turned dark and the lightning started ^^; (So, yes, we left then, as did everyone else.) I might post some pictures later -- I've already uploaded them to photobucket, so all that's left is linking and commentary (but obviously I haven't gotten to it yet ...).
Along with the zoo, I hung out at Traci's house and we played some Vesperia. More correctly, *I* played some Vesperia, which was nice since I'd only seen the very beginning and the very end of the game to that point, hehe. Now I've played the first 10 or 15 (lost track ...) hours, and I enjoyed it quite a bit. The story doesn't have as much of a hook as other Tales games I've played ("Hay guys, let's go find the blonde dude for some reason that I won't tell you!"), but I love Yuri as a main character (♥ ♥ ♥) and the theme of struggle between the classes could become fairly interesting too. The only character I really didn't care for was Rita (she's kind of bitchy, in my opinion). Yeah, I'm not bothered by Estelle. I guess that makes ... one of us, heh. (Also, I ♥ Repede, but who doesn't? XD) I also enjoyed the combat system (I mean, it is a Tales game -- this is pretty much a given), and ... I really like the graphics style, more than I expected to.
Not like I'm going to rush out and buy an Xbox any time soon, but if I had one, I would definitely pick up Vesperia. (... This goes for any Tales game out in English for a system I have, of course ...)
Let's see ... last Sunday was my graduation party. It was fine; lots of children somehow related to me screaming and jumping on my water bed and chasing the dog, but you know, they're family. It was nice to see some relatives that I haven't seen in a while, though I mostly stuck to hanging out with friends since there were fewer of them than relatives -- I figured I could let the relatives entertain each other while I entertained the friends. I have a lot of relatives -- parties like this remind me of that (and not all of them were there, either). My elderly (94?!) grandpa came. He mostly stays in his house these days -- my mom does grocery shopping for him even. He looks so frail now ... I've felt a bit guilty since I haven't gone to see him at all since I've gotten home from school, so I'm glad he was there. I really am becoming a hikikomori ...
Speaking of the party, I need to write a lot of thank you cards. Even though our invitations said guests didn't need to bring presents (in not so many words), a lot of them did. I'm certainly grateful, though such generosity always makes me a bit uncomfortable for some reason -- perhaps I feel that graduating college isn't that big a deal, and I'm letting people down because of my current state of NEET-hood. I know I could be trying harder to find a job -- not that I'm not trying at all, but I'm sure I could do more. I just feel ... clueless. I don't even know what I want any more, and that's been plaguing me for months. "I want to be a writer" -- that was something I could have said easily in the past, but now ... I just feel like a talentless hack with no good ideas. I know that real writers don't wait for inspiration to do their writing. I'm having trouble, though.
Editing too ... I hate this lack of certainty. People say they go to college to figure out what they want to do, but I haven't figured it out yet. I don't know if I ever will. So the thought lurks in the back of my mind: "Was it a waste for you to go to college?" Perhaps it was just my own selfishness ... I'm afraid that's the case.
I'm a very selfish person ...
And overly negative about myself. But anyway. "Life is an adventure, and God has a plan." I will keep repeating this sentence to myself until life makes sense again -- if ever that should happen.
With a lack of much else to do (I know, I could be doing more), I've been investing myself in various forms of entertainment lately. I picked up on a file of Tales of Eternia (U.S.: Tales of Destiny II) that was more than halfway through (maybe three-quarters of the way?) and played it up until the final dungeon. There are a lot of revelations about the characters that I had completely forgotten and some extra stuff that I hadn't done in my first game, so it was fun to play it again. I suppose I'll finish out the game too, since I'm so close now. I remember liking the ending a lot anyway -- cute couples always get me.
I read the first 7 or 8 volumes of a manga called Bara no Tame ni (For the Roses) about a chubby, unattractive girl who finds out she's the daughter of a beautiful movie star and goes to live with her gorgeous half-siblings. Yeah, it's one of those weird, "Is this relationship incestuous yet?" series (because of course they're not *really* related somehow ... right? Right?!). I suppose the drama made it easy to read, because I just kept going despite my groans of, "Um, sure, like that would happen" and the squickiness of pseudo-incest. Certainly not as good (or mature) as some of the other josei manga I've read; other than the heroine's age (18 at the start), there was really nothing that distinguished it from ye olde melodramatic shoujo starring high school girls. Oh, but the heroine's supposed to be unattractive! Hmm, I thought I might be able to relate to her because of that, but no, of course several hot guys fall for her anyway (because they find her unattractiveness adorable, I guess). Oh, well.
Caught up to Pandora Hearts today -- stopped at ep. 13. Still somewhat interesting as far as the plot goes, and the characters are a whole lot of fun. It's not particularly "deep" or anything, but ...
I'm thinking of trying out a few older series (I blame it on Traci ^^). I've downloaded the first few episodes of Daddy Long Legs (enjoyed the novel a few years back) and Kaikan Phrase (mmm, pulpy! And 100% less sex than I've heard the manga has). Yes, very random.
I also got past the episode of utter weirdness (with the paper cutouts instead of animation) in His and Her Circumstances (aka Kare Kano). Was this the series that Hideaki Anno had a breakdown during? I think I've hear rumors suggesting that (though some say he had a breakdown during Eva instead ...), and it wouldn't surprise me. I'm not sure if I want to finish re-watching the series or not ... at least this time I know what happens beyond the end, thanks to the manga.
Fourth of July weekend will soon be here ... not sure yet what I'll be doing. My parents will be out of the house until Saturday, and I haven't decided yet if I want to join them and their friends for fireworks at least. My other option is just hanging out by myself. I don't mind being alone, but ... Independence Day is one of my favorite holidays because of fireworks, so I hate to miss a good show of them, even if it requires me to awkwardly hang out with my parents' friends.
So much rambling ... this point in my life is such a strange one. I told my mom the other day that I've come to the end of my rope, and I need to find a new one to grab hold of -- education was one rope that I'd been climbing for years, but there's none left now. I don't know what to do. Maybe everyone goes through this, and I'm just slow in resolving my issues and moving on to adulthood ...
I was paging through my high school yearbook yesterday, and I couldn't help but wonder where all my classmates have ended up. I wonder where I will end up ... ?