We're gonna get fired.
oogmarish: Okay, so fireballs in the Montage kitchen are an amazing, time honoured tradition that are GROUNDS FOR GETTING YOUR ASS FIRED, ARRESTED, AND 86'D FOR LIFE.
t3ch6lut: lol
oogmarish: I'm not even joking.
oogmarish: You can get arrested.
t3ch6lut: thats awesome however
oogmarish: So what you do is you fill a pan with a whole lot of paprika and flour and oil, like 1/4 paprika/flour (both explosives) and 3/4 oil.
oogmarish: Then you remove the grating on one of the burners and set the pan directly on the flame with another pan flipped upside down to create a seal.
oogmarish: After about ten minutes, the pressure inside will get so intense that the internal flames will cause the top pan to catch on fire, at which point you cast that pan aside.
t3ch6lut: lol
oogmarish: While you're waiting for this science to start working, you take grease from the 1/3 pan you've been draining your protein grease into all night and put about an eighth of an inch of it into the pan bucket.
oogmarish: Which, if you've had a busy night, will already be full of grease and other explosive kitchen agents.
oogmarish: You must understand, being a cook is about 60% chemistry.
oogmarish: So now that you have that first pan filled with flaming fire agents, the bucket filled with explosive that's waiting for flame, and a nice little liner of more explosive that will be set off when the two meet...
oogmarish: you shut off the lights, move the bucket to the center of the line (Jimmy apparently blew the door of the frier when they forgot to do this once), make sure nobody is standing in the backline or near the window, get a safe 10-15 feet away, and somebody drops the pan from about 8 feet up.
oogmarish: Praying that a) they don't miss and b) they get away in time to not be set on fire.
oogmarish: You know that scene in every great action movie where they blow the ever-living fuck out of some house/car/boat in the middle of the night and all that you can see for a second is a white ball of flame and destruction and like one or two people silhouetted against it?
oogmarish: That's what happens.
oogmarish: And this one was HUGE.
oogmarish: Unfortunately, we forgot to take all of our tickets down first, so we had all of this food that was almost done cooking and we didn't know where it was going.
t3ch6lut: lol
oogmarish: I'm not even joking.
oogmarish: You can get arrested.
t3ch6lut: thats awesome however
oogmarish: So what you do is you fill a pan with a whole lot of paprika and flour and oil, like 1/4 paprika/flour (both explosives) and 3/4 oil.
oogmarish: Then you remove the grating on one of the burners and set the pan directly on the flame with another pan flipped upside down to create a seal.
oogmarish: After about ten minutes, the pressure inside will get so intense that the internal flames will cause the top pan to catch on fire, at which point you cast that pan aside.
t3ch6lut: lol
oogmarish: While you're waiting for this science to start working, you take grease from the 1/3 pan you've been draining your protein grease into all night and put about an eighth of an inch of it into the pan bucket.
oogmarish: Which, if you've had a busy night, will already be full of grease and other explosive kitchen agents.
oogmarish: You must understand, being a cook is about 60% chemistry.
oogmarish: So now that you have that first pan filled with flaming fire agents, the bucket filled with explosive that's waiting for flame, and a nice little liner of more explosive that will be set off when the two meet...
oogmarish: you shut off the lights, move the bucket to the center of the line (Jimmy apparently blew the door of the frier when they forgot to do this once), make sure nobody is standing in the backline or near the window, get a safe 10-15 feet away, and somebody drops the pan from about 8 feet up.
oogmarish: Praying that a) they don't miss and b) they get away in time to not be set on fire.
oogmarish: You know that scene in every great action movie where they blow the ever-living fuck out of some house/car/boat in the middle of the night and all that you can see for a second is a white ball of flame and destruction and like one or two people silhouetted against it?
oogmarish: That's what happens.
oogmarish: And this one was HUGE.
oogmarish: Unfortunately, we forgot to take all of our tickets down first, so we had all of this food that was almost done cooking and we didn't know where it was going.