So long, indie cred.
Okay. The thing is, I'm proud of my mp3 collection. I'm proud in that scary Rob Fleming way, where I rearrange them when I'm sad. I've gotten past the point in my development when a band was only good if nobody else had ever heard of it, but I consider my rock snobbery part of my identity. My playlist is probably 75% semi-obscure to obscure, 20% respectable mainstream, and 4% a little cheesy but nostalgic or meaningful for some reason.
But then there are the songs I don't admit to. The ones that I rock out to at 3 AM but lie in my "Current Music" field on LJ. Here are the worst of them, with brief and insufficient excuses for their existence that probably make it even worse. And mp3s, because you secretly want them too. Admit it.
11. Soul Asylum - Stand Up and Be Strong
I also have "Runaway Train," which is not embarrassing at all -- it's a good song. But some bands should not make comeback albums 15 years after the fact, and some people should not keep songs from those comeback albums on their hard drive.
10. Jimmy Eat World - The Middle (acoustic)
I have a Jimmy Eat World rarity. But the acoustic version makes this a pretty song.
9. Martika - Toy Soldiers
I liked some really shitty music when I was in fourth grade. And the problem with liking songs in fourth grade is, they are imprinted on your psyche and you still like them when you're in nineteenth grade.
8. Tom Jones - Sex Bomb (Mousse T remix)
Is it worse to have the original or the Euro-dance remix that sounds like 2 AM in a Tel Aviv bar?
7. A-ha - Here I Stand and Face the Rain
You're allowed to have "Take On Me." That's a classic. But other A-ha songs? Not so much.
6. Cam'ron - I.B.S.
Novelty rap about Cam'ron's digestive distress. Makes me laugh, because I am a ten-year-old boy.
5. Billie Myers - Kiss the Rain
This is actually a terrible song. But it reminds me of going to gay nightclubs in London circa 2000, so all I hear is happy.
4. The Black Crowes - Back Door Santa
Every time I listen to this, I feel like I'm betraying feminism, queer liberation, and fuzzy kittens.
3. Eve 6 - I Touch Myself
I have a lot of covers of this song, most of which are self-consciously funny. But Eve 6 are too unironically mediocre to be self-consciously anything.
2. Maxime Rodriguez - Child of Nazareth
Yes, I have an mp3 of Johnny Weir's current long program music. The opportunity presented itself; what was I going to do, pass it up?
1. Lindsay Lohan - I Want You To Want Me
There's really no excuse for this one.
So what are the worst songs on your playlist?
But then there are the songs I don't admit to. The ones that I rock out to at 3 AM but lie in my "Current Music" field on LJ. Here are the worst of them, with brief and insufficient excuses for their existence that probably make it even worse. And mp3s, because you secretly want them too. Admit it.
11. Soul Asylum - Stand Up and Be Strong
I also have "Runaway Train," which is not embarrassing at all -- it's a good song. But some bands should not make comeback albums 15 years after the fact, and some people should not keep songs from those comeback albums on their hard drive.
10. Jimmy Eat World - The Middle (acoustic)
I have a Jimmy Eat World rarity. But the acoustic version makes this a pretty song.
9. Martika - Toy Soldiers
I liked some really shitty music when I was in fourth grade. And the problem with liking songs in fourth grade is, they are imprinted on your psyche and you still like them when you're in nineteenth grade.
8. Tom Jones - Sex Bomb (Mousse T remix)
Is it worse to have the original or the Euro-dance remix that sounds like 2 AM in a Tel Aviv bar?
7. A-ha - Here I Stand and Face the Rain
You're allowed to have "Take On Me." That's a classic. But other A-ha songs? Not so much.
6. Cam'ron - I.B.S.
Novelty rap about Cam'ron's digestive distress. Makes me laugh, because I am a ten-year-old boy.
5. Billie Myers - Kiss the Rain
This is actually a terrible song. But it reminds me of going to gay nightclubs in London circa 2000, so all I hear is happy.
4. The Black Crowes - Back Door Santa
Every time I listen to this, I feel like I'm betraying feminism, queer liberation, and fuzzy kittens.
3. Eve 6 - I Touch Myself
I have a lot of covers of this song, most of which are self-consciously funny. But Eve 6 are too unironically mediocre to be self-consciously anything.
2. Maxime Rodriguez - Child of Nazareth
Yes, I have an mp3 of Johnny Weir's current long program music. The opportunity presented itself; what was I going to do, pass it up?
1. Lindsay Lohan - I Want You To Want Me
There's really no excuse for this one.
So what are the worst songs on your playlist?