GROUP DISCUSSIONS
We had a system meeting about the group thing. People here are really iffy, since we don't cry and we don't seem to convey the 'normal' signs of grief. I couldn't give a rat's ass what people think, but it pains folks here that they can't cry. It's always been an issue. To enter a group to talk about M, his death, without the outward signs of grief might be self defeating. The Doc brought up how our grief shows more like the traditional male, trained not to cry. Problem with that is we're not male. It's a quandary.
Nikie called and left messages with both groups to find out when and where. She promised D she would go with him, since the Rabbi moved his session to another week out. He's feeling lost in school's end and summer break looming, concerned it will be more space he will have to fill. He wants to make a road trip with friends, normally I wouldn't hesitate, he's a responsible young adult. The trouble is right now he's overwhelmed and is 'reacting' instead of his usual thoughtful self. So the more he gets involved with talking this mess thu the better.
The Suicide group is an all ages thing, from teens up. That might be the place to go with D since it's not specific to parents or adults. This group doesn't meet till a couple Wednesdays from now, leaves time to prepare.
The CF group is much more focused on parents and older adults. The outreach person said they tried having a teen group but it didn't work out. The more this woman spoke the more anxiety rose. Finally the zinger came, she told Nikie, "it's very soon to be reaching out and attending a group. This group is peer run, it's always good to have a private counselor." Nikie told her it was our therapist who had recommended CF and that she wasn't sure she'd get there, it's this Monday night, but thank you for the information. In truth that statement, from the outreach person, was enough to shut them down. It would appear there's another timetable we weren't aware of, nor was the Doc for that matter.
I think for now, we just shouldn't push that timetable, but it's up to the moms. What Nikie did get, from our insurance provider, is extra sessions with the Doc for June. I guess the going rate for a dead child is more then three.
Ravin
Nikie called and left messages with both groups to find out when and where. She promised D she would go with him, since the Rabbi moved his session to another week out. He's feeling lost in school's end and summer break looming, concerned it will be more space he will have to fill. He wants to make a road trip with friends, normally I wouldn't hesitate, he's a responsible young adult. The trouble is right now he's overwhelmed and is 'reacting' instead of his usual thoughtful self. So the more he gets involved with talking this mess thu the better.
The Suicide group is an all ages thing, from teens up. That might be the place to go with D since it's not specific to parents or adults. This group doesn't meet till a couple Wednesdays from now, leaves time to prepare.
The CF group is much more focused on parents and older adults. The outreach person said they tried having a teen group but it didn't work out. The more this woman spoke the more anxiety rose. Finally the zinger came, she told Nikie, "it's very soon to be reaching out and attending a group. This group is peer run, it's always good to have a private counselor." Nikie told her it was our therapist who had recommended CF and that she wasn't sure she'd get there, it's this Monday night, but thank you for the information. In truth that statement, from the outreach person, was enough to shut them down. It would appear there's another timetable we weren't aware of, nor was the Doc for that matter.
I think for now, we just shouldn't push that timetable, but it's up to the moms. What Nikie did get, from our insurance provider, is extra sessions with the Doc for June. I guess the going rate for a dead child is more then three.
Ravin