I achieved my goal- Yay 3 clap.
I set out to write in this lj every day for the month of March. And, if you look to the calendar on the side panel on the right, it will say that I've posted every day! Yay 3 clap. Sure, some of the entries were backdated, but I made the attempt to write. And I'm the final ruling- it counts! yay.
I set out to write this entry about a half hour ago, but I looked to the right of me and noticed my brother's middle school yearbook from 2004-2005. He was graduating 8th grade at the time, and I was graduating high school. I began to look through it, glancing at all the kids from kindigarten through 8th grade, and it made me realize how much time has changed. The kids are changing, teachers are changing- In a school where I used to basically know EVERYBODY- I now basically know nobody. The familiar teachers I grew up with are fading from the yearbook as the times roll on, replaced by freshfaced new ones. Its as though all the ties I had with the school are dissolving, and I feel slightly as though I'm losing a part of me. Its not something I'm going to go cry over for days on end, but it still leaves a sad, bittersweet feeling deep inside of me. There was a time when I, along with all my classmates, used to rule the school- it was ours. We rode the wave as though it would never hit dry land, never recede back into the vast ocean to pick up other surfers. And then, we were beeched. Left on the side to watch our legacy disappear. For awhile, I still felt as though I could cling to the school, grasp at the edges to still retain part of it. But, the faces changed. The teachers changed. And now, a name that used to be known throughout the school is only a stranger's identification. It's a faceless name upon plaques on the wall, a generic teammate behind the trophies. Wow, that sounds really narcisistic. That's not how I meant it to sound. Basically, for someone who clings on to every little thing that reminds her of her childhood and the memories associated with it, losing something like this makes an impact.
The same applies to high school. Not so much now because I've only been out for two years, but I still hold that close to my heart. It still saddens me to watch our wave, our times, slowly drift back out to sea, washing away any evidence that we ever stood on those grounds. It'll only be a matter of time before I return to the school and realize it's not the Windor High School I know, it'll just be a building that at one time was filled with the greatest memories from my teenage years. I'll walk in and the place will be different, the people will be different. It will have a different smell and a different feeling about it, and I won't be able to do anything but shutter from the change. Click, the lights are off, the door is closed. It will say to me, " you've had your time, and now it's time to leave, move on, we must keep the generations moving through."
*le sigh*. Life. I want to grow up, to keep progressing, but is it bad that sometimes, just sometimes, I desperately long to go back to the innocent days of middle/high school, where you could ignore the future and just live in the moment. You didn't have to worry about the rapidly approaching adulthood and could just...be?
Stupid yearbooks.
/philosophical soliloquy. Return to reality.
Yesterday I was super tired when I woke up, and I seriously considered skipping my class. But it was theater and we're doing partner work that we have to peform on Tuesday, so I knew I couldn't let my partner down, I had to be there. So, I dragged myself into the shower and got ready. HAHA surprise. When I got there, my scene partner said that she had to rush to the dentist, her crown had just broken in half and they had to put dental cement on it or something. So, I could have skipped the class.
Then I had computer graphics, and I really wanted to work on my project but he spent the class going back over some things. Not a totally wasted class, but still not productive when compared to the list of shit I have to do in the next coming weeks.
As soon as that class rolled around, I met with Elaine to talk about my fall schedule. She basically scrapped the whole thing and gave me a new list of classes I have to look for in order to keep up with both the graphic design and marketing degrees. The nice thing is that we went over both program evaluations and updated the list of classes I still have to take, moving some classes around and making substitutions and whatnot to make it all start to take some shape.
I won't graduate on time still, but atleast it actually looks like I'll GRADUATE now. mer.
That finished up my class duties for the week, so I hopped the CATMA with Amanda and we loaded our shit to go home. When we hit Windsor we ran into Chris Goulet, so we stopped and talked with him for a bit before grabbing dinner at where else? THE CHEF.
And then of course, the weekend wouldn't be complete without a trip to Wal Mart! Afterwards it was back to Amanda's house to bake a cake for Ashley's birthday and decorate it, watch Happy Feet ( probably the cutest movie I've seeeeeeeen =D) and hit the sheets so we could wake up early to go shopping!
But, more about that tomorrow :) I'm practically falling asleep at the keyboard.
~@~Nichole
I set out to write this entry about a half hour ago, but I looked to the right of me and noticed my brother's middle school yearbook from 2004-2005. He was graduating 8th grade at the time, and I was graduating high school. I began to look through it, glancing at all the kids from kindigarten through 8th grade, and it made me realize how much time has changed. The kids are changing, teachers are changing- In a school where I used to basically know EVERYBODY- I now basically know nobody. The familiar teachers I grew up with are fading from the yearbook as the times roll on, replaced by freshfaced new ones. Its as though all the ties I had with the school are dissolving, and I feel slightly as though I'm losing a part of me. Its not something I'm going to go cry over for days on end, but it still leaves a sad, bittersweet feeling deep inside of me. There was a time when I, along with all my classmates, used to rule the school- it was ours. We rode the wave as though it would never hit dry land, never recede back into the vast ocean to pick up other surfers. And then, we were beeched. Left on the side to watch our legacy disappear. For awhile, I still felt as though I could cling to the school, grasp at the edges to still retain part of it. But, the faces changed. The teachers changed. And now, a name that used to be known throughout the school is only a stranger's identification. It's a faceless name upon plaques on the wall, a generic teammate behind the trophies. Wow, that sounds really narcisistic. That's not how I meant it to sound. Basically, for someone who clings on to every little thing that reminds her of her childhood and the memories associated with it, losing something like this makes an impact.
The same applies to high school. Not so much now because I've only been out for two years, but I still hold that close to my heart. It still saddens me to watch our wave, our times, slowly drift back out to sea, washing away any evidence that we ever stood on those grounds. It'll only be a matter of time before I return to the school and realize it's not the Windor High School I know, it'll just be a building that at one time was filled with the greatest memories from my teenage years. I'll walk in and the place will be different, the people will be different. It will have a different smell and a different feeling about it, and I won't be able to do anything but shutter from the change. Click, the lights are off, the door is closed. It will say to me, " you've had your time, and now it's time to leave, move on, we must keep the generations moving through."
*le sigh*. Life. I want to grow up, to keep progressing, but is it bad that sometimes, just sometimes, I desperately long to go back to the innocent days of middle/high school, where you could ignore the future and just live in the moment. You didn't have to worry about the rapidly approaching adulthood and could just...be?
Stupid yearbooks.
/philosophical soliloquy. Return to reality.
Yesterday I was super tired when I woke up, and I seriously considered skipping my class. But it was theater and we're doing partner work that we have to peform on Tuesday, so I knew I couldn't let my partner down, I had to be there. So, I dragged myself into the shower and got ready. HAHA surprise. When I got there, my scene partner said that she had to rush to the dentist, her crown had just broken in half and they had to put dental cement on it or something. So, I could have skipped the class.
Then I had computer graphics, and I really wanted to work on my project but he spent the class going back over some things. Not a totally wasted class, but still not productive when compared to the list of shit I have to do in the next coming weeks.
As soon as that class rolled around, I met with Elaine to talk about my fall schedule. She basically scrapped the whole thing and gave me a new list of classes I have to look for in order to keep up with both the graphic design and marketing degrees. The nice thing is that we went over both program evaluations and updated the list of classes I still have to take, moving some classes around and making substitutions and whatnot to make it all start to take some shape.
I won't graduate on time still, but atleast it actually looks like I'll GRADUATE now. mer.
That finished up my class duties for the week, so I hopped the CATMA with Amanda and we loaded our shit to go home. When we hit Windsor we ran into Chris Goulet, so we stopped and talked with him for a bit before grabbing dinner at where else? THE CHEF.
And then of course, the weekend wouldn't be complete without a trip to Wal Mart! Afterwards it was back to Amanda's house to bake a cake for Ashley's birthday and decorate it, watch Happy Feet ( probably the cutest movie I've seeeeeeeen =D) and hit the sheets so we could wake up early to go shopping!
But, more about that tomorrow :) I'm practically falling asleep at the keyboard.
~@~Nichole