Lady Sally's Place, Wednesday afternoon
River curled up under the blankets, eyes closed and breathing steadily. To anyone watching, she looked asleep, but she wasn't. The past few months were running through her head in a blur as she tried to get a grip on reality. Yesterday's ET class hadn't gone so well, and River needed to focus, exorcise the memories of that thing, Wraith, it had whispered in her head.
She knew she could call Tara, but the woman who was like a mother wouldn't understand. Or, River feared, she would understand all too well, and she didn't want to cause her more grief. Lee, on the other hand, was so much like River's own angry half, the part of her that needed action. She decided she should probably call Lee sooner rather than later, to tell the woman about this. And Simon.
Freya had been so wonderful, knowing even more than Simon what River was dealing with. She and Emma were like her, and they knew what it was like to have a mind that's not wholly your own. Her presence yesterday was more helpful than she thought anyone's besides Simon's could be. River was so grateful for her help, and for taking her home, keeping Simon from finding out about Lady Sally's before she had a chance to prepare him.
River shook her head almost imperceptibly, needing to turn her mind to other things, like all the people she'd met. She met Yazoo and his brothers, who were strange and hard, but more interesting than most normal people. There was something about them that wasn't fully human, something she couldn't place. Max too wasn't quite normal. She felt a kinship with the other woman, something almost like she felt with the other students at the Academy.
And then there was Jayne. That was something wholly unexpected, but ... she was happy. He saw her as a woman, not as a child. In truth, she hadn't been a child since long before she went to the Academy, but everyone, especially Simon, couldn't accept that. And then there was the pr0n sex. It wasn't clinical and clean like she'd been taught in books; it was messy and sweaty, and more than just physical. River had mulled it over in the weeks since, and she'd come to the conclusion that she liked it. She wasn't sure if it was because of Jayne, or if it was the act. Their next meeting had been a little awkward, but had progressed into something very nice. It wasn't something she would normally do, but she liked it. She smiled to herself, remembering the rest of the night.
Then Friday, she'd found him. Simon, her brother, the one person who would always take care of her, the one she knew she could always trust and count on, was here. He'd come looking for her, knowing that without each other, they were lost. She'd been okay without him, even though the first few weeks were hard. She felt that perhaps he needed her even more than she needed him, especially since Miranda. She'd been much better, yesterday's fit aside, since then. Even here, with Simon gone, she still had her family.
Her family, Tara's family, really. She'd finally met Bruce, the pretty man with so many secrets, and noticed a distinct change in him. She felt like it was Tara's doing, her love and personality infecting everyone around her. She helped make dinner, and drank bubble tea, and intriguing concoction. Even after learning about Jayne's little run-in from the pretty blonde George, she still felt very comfortable there with Tara.
She confronted Jayne on Tuesday, because she was angry, and slightly hurt. River wasn't sure why she was hurt that he didn't tell her, but she thought it might have to do with learning about it from George, and not from him. She apologized for jumping to conclusions, then told him about Simon. As much as she loved her brother, he wasn't going to like this ... thing, she had with Jayne. And that was another problem. What was this? She wanted a name, something so she could categorize these feelings and interactions.
As her thoughts drifted back to the previous evening, she felt much calmer, and could look at the situation in a much detached manner. The thing was locked away, and it couldn't get to her, either bodily or psychically. The Wraith's mind felt to her like an intelligent, psychic Reaver, something that wanted nothing more than to murder and eat, but had much more cunning ways of achieving their aims. She could feel its joy -- though using 'joy' to describe that thing's emotion seemed to sully the word -- at her terror, and its surprise that it could reach her that way. She realized, too late of course, that she could have stood up to it, could have pushed it away, or at least tried. But she hadn't.
River opened her eyes, staring up at the ceiling. She'd skipped her NPC math classes today, and was pondering skipping Wormhole Dynamics. She didn't feel up to class today, and she didn't want to explain her fit to Dr. McKay just yet. She rolled over and curled up further under the covers, sighing.
She knew she could call Tara, but the woman who was like a mother wouldn't understand. Or, River feared, she would understand all too well, and she didn't want to cause her more grief. Lee, on the other hand, was so much like River's own angry half, the part of her that needed action. She decided she should probably call Lee sooner rather than later, to tell the woman about this. And Simon.
Freya had been so wonderful, knowing even more than Simon what River was dealing with. She and Emma were like her, and they knew what it was like to have a mind that's not wholly your own. Her presence yesterday was more helpful than she thought anyone's besides Simon's could be. River was so grateful for her help, and for taking her home, keeping Simon from finding out about Lady Sally's before she had a chance to prepare him.
River shook her head almost imperceptibly, needing to turn her mind to other things, like all the people she'd met. She met Yazoo and his brothers, who were strange and hard, but more interesting than most normal people. There was something about them that wasn't fully human, something she couldn't place. Max too wasn't quite normal. She felt a kinship with the other woman, something almost like she felt with the other students at the Academy.
And then there was Jayne. That was something wholly unexpected, but ... she was happy. He saw her as a woman, not as a child. In truth, she hadn't been a child since long before she went to the Academy, but everyone, especially Simon, couldn't accept that. And then there was the pr0n sex. It wasn't clinical and clean like she'd been taught in books; it was messy and sweaty, and more than just physical. River had mulled it over in the weeks since, and she'd come to the conclusion that she liked it. She wasn't sure if it was because of Jayne, or if it was the act. Their next meeting had been a little awkward, but had progressed into something very nice. It wasn't something she would normally do, but she liked it. She smiled to herself, remembering the rest of the night.
Then Friday, she'd found him. Simon, her brother, the one person who would always take care of her, the one she knew she could always trust and count on, was here. He'd come looking for her, knowing that without each other, they were lost. She'd been okay without him, even though the first few weeks were hard. She felt that perhaps he needed her even more than she needed him, especially since Miranda. She'd been much better, yesterday's fit aside, since then. Even here, with Simon gone, she still had her family.
Her family, Tara's family, really. She'd finally met Bruce, the pretty man with so many secrets, and noticed a distinct change in him. She felt like it was Tara's doing, her love and personality infecting everyone around her. She helped make dinner, and drank bubble tea, and intriguing concoction. Even after learning about Jayne's little run-in from the pretty blonde George, she still felt very comfortable there with Tara.
She confronted Jayne on Tuesday, because she was angry, and slightly hurt. River wasn't sure why she was hurt that he didn't tell her, but she thought it might have to do with learning about it from George, and not from him. She apologized for jumping to conclusions, then told him about Simon. As much as she loved her brother, he wasn't going to like this ... thing, she had with Jayne. And that was another problem. What was this? She wanted a name, something so she could categorize these feelings and interactions.
As her thoughts drifted back to the previous evening, she felt much calmer, and could look at the situation in a much detached manner. The thing was locked away, and it couldn't get to her, either bodily or psychically. The Wraith's mind felt to her like an intelligent, psychic Reaver, something that wanted nothing more than to murder and eat, but had much more cunning ways of achieving their aims. She could feel its joy -- though using 'joy' to describe that thing's emotion seemed to sully the word -- at her terror, and its surprise that it could reach her that way. She realized, too late of course, that she could have stood up to it, could have pushed it away, or at least tried. But she hadn't.
River opened her eyes, staring up at the ceiling. She'd skipped her NPC math classes today, and was pondering skipping Wormhole Dynamics. She didn't feel up to class today, and she didn't want to explain her fit to Dr. McKay just yet. She rolled over and curled up further under the covers, sighing.