Embarrassment of riches
I've been debating about whether to filter this to my sexuality filter, but I don't think I will, for similar reasons as the last post. Fundamentally, it's talking about larger concepts.
Still,
There is so much good, fascinating, fun conversation going on in my life right now. And it's totally making me hot.
It seems that states of arousal have a good deal of interchangeability for me -- intellectual arousal (conversation), or general physical arousal (swimming, for instance), or emotional arousal (good music) aren't the same thing as specifically sexual arousal, but they all tend to 'prime the pump' in a powerful way. Especially conversation. I'm totally digging the awesome conversations I've been having recently. I'm also definitely somewhere on the hypomanic side of life at the moment, which is always fun, and means the brainmice aren't nibbling, which leaves so much more energy for just enjoying all the fun stuff my brain can do when exposed to other people's brains. *love*
I'm having a bunch of great conversations right now -- at home, by email, on mailing lists, in person... Totally an embarrassment of riches. I find myself wishing I could take a day off work just to sit around writing and talking.
It reminds me of a conversation I had with my counselor about why counseling is valuable to me. I process ideas out loud, through the process of trying to formulate them clearly enough to express to other people, and having a counselor I can do that with is immensely helpful to me, especially given the way I tend to intellectualize my approach to life.
I've had two people who've responded specifically to the statement in my various personals that I enjoy good conversation as an end to itself -- one local, and one in Canada -- and I had dinner with the local one tonight. He's coming from a very different perspective and life experience in terms of sexuality, and has an interestingly journalistic kind of curiosity about why I am who I am, and why I like what I like, and what I believe about it. We have an interesting time comparing worldviews, and he asks perceptive and interesting questions, so it was a great time, and I think we're doing it again next Wednesday. I think part of what I really enjoy about it, and why I don't enjoy a lot of the conversations people try to have with me about ostensibly similar subjects, is that too often the other person is substantially more titillated by the idea/fantasy of BiPolyKinkyGirl than actually honestly and intelligently curious about it on any deep level. Sexuality is one of my favorite "academic", for lack of a better word, interests, and I love having real conversations about it -- "Ooh, wow, you do what?" may occasionally pet my exhibitionist side, but mostly it just bores me -- I want to talk about the topic, but I want to talk about it differently than the vast majority of people seem to want to (present company excluded -- there's a reason I have the social network that I do), and although it certainly can be foreplay, that's not its sole or even primary purpose in my life, by any stretch.
Good maude, I should be in bed now. I'm exhausted, but I'm all wired.
Still,
There is so much good, fascinating, fun conversation going on in my life right now. And it's totally making me hot.
It seems that states of arousal have a good deal of interchangeability for me -- intellectual arousal (conversation), or general physical arousal (swimming, for instance), or emotional arousal (good music) aren't the same thing as specifically sexual arousal, but they all tend to 'prime the pump' in a powerful way. Especially conversation. I'm totally digging the awesome conversations I've been having recently. I'm also definitely somewhere on the hypomanic side of life at the moment, which is always fun, and means the brainmice aren't nibbling, which leaves so much more energy for just enjoying all the fun stuff my brain can do when exposed to other people's brains. *love*
I'm having a bunch of great conversations right now -- at home, by email, on mailing lists, in person... Totally an embarrassment of riches. I find myself wishing I could take a day off work just to sit around writing and talking.
It reminds me of a conversation I had with my counselor about why counseling is valuable to me. I process ideas out loud, through the process of trying to formulate them clearly enough to express to other people, and having a counselor I can do that with is immensely helpful to me, especially given the way I tend to intellectualize my approach to life.
I've had two people who've responded specifically to the statement in my various personals that I enjoy good conversation as an end to itself -- one local, and one in Canada -- and I had dinner with the local one tonight. He's coming from a very different perspective and life experience in terms of sexuality, and has an interestingly journalistic kind of curiosity about why I am who I am, and why I like what I like, and what I believe about it. We have an interesting time comparing worldviews, and he asks perceptive and interesting questions, so it was a great time, and I think we're doing it again next Wednesday. I think part of what I really enjoy about it, and why I don't enjoy a lot of the conversations people try to have with me about ostensibly similar subjects, is that too often the other person is substantially more titillated by the idea/fantasy of BiPolyKinkyGirl than actually honestly and intelligently curious about it on any deep level. Sexuality is one of my favorite "academic", for lack of a better word, interests, and I love having real conversations about it -- "Ooh, wow, you do what?" may occasionally pet my exhibitionist side, but mostly it just bores me -- I want to talk about the topic, but I want to talk about it differently than the vast majority of people seem to want to (present company excluded -- there's a reason I have the social network that I do), and although it certainly can be foreplay, that's not its sole or even primary purpose in my life, by any stretch.
Good maude, I should be in bed now. I'm exhausted, but I'm all wired.