"I'm sorry for getting so technical." (said -- repeatedly -- while not getting technical)
"That's too complicated for you."
"You don't want to do that."

I don't? Fucking watch me.

I have buttons! I do not like having them pressed. Things that will help you not press my buttons ( Read more... )

Okay -- when the doctor's office says "okay! take care!" and hangs up on you and then you slam down the phone and scream "FUCK YOU!" at the top of your lungs, maybe, just maybe it's time to examine your testiness level. And get a new doctor.

I swear, other than that I'm pretty happy. :)

( Read more... )

You know how, sometimes, a thousand things go wrong at once? Like you take your car in for an oil change and your (very thorough and reputable and honest) mechanic calls you a few times until the repairs add up to $1800, and you had scheduled lunch with a friend and a meeting with your new boss and have to cancel both of them, and your bank screws ( Read more... )

It's good to know that the government cares about abstinence education for unmarried 29-year-olds.

I just learned we're moving to a new building in April. At first, I thought this was a good idea - I mean, the building we're in now is a bit institutional and we're moving to swanker digs. But - get this - some efficiency expert has decided that we'd all do a better job if our cubicles were slightly smaller and just below chest-height. For those ( Read more... )