(no subject)
Talking with my good friend Jenn the other day, we were analyzing ourselves in relation to our relationships (or lack thereof. sorry to expose you my frienf) and we both agreed that we have certain female faults.
First, I'm guilty of overanalyzing every action, every word, every look. I tend to make each one mean more than it probably does. "Hey" does not mean "Hey lets walk down the aisle and get married," it's just plain old "hey, i'm acknowledging your existence, be grateful." Secondly, my thoughts run rampant and I often find myself planning the relationship in my mind before it even gets the chance to plan itself. I set unrealistic expections which obviously do not pan out and I end up bummed because said guy did not turn out the way I had imagined. These two examples are extremely detrimental when in the dating game, and I find myself handicapped because of these qualities (should they even be called such?) that I possess.
Now, I know men seem to think that we women are a "mystery" and you can never "figure us out" but I have only this to say to the men: right back at you. You're just as confusing and complicated! However, I do wonder if you ever overanalyze and pre-plan as much as we do. Do you lay in your bed at night and thoughtfully consider actions and voice inflections? Do you dream about flying away to Paris or Italy for a romantic getaway? Somehow, I think not. I'm pretty sure you lay awake in your bed doing other things that really have no relevance to whether we're in the physically picture or not. Though I'm sure it is much more pleasureable if we're there.
Regardless of physicality, do men put as much emotional time and effort into relationships as women? If not, why not? Why does it often seem that a woman is much more "into the relationship" than a man is? What do men think about when it comes to relationships, do they ponder the emotional depths or do they just take things as they come? I think the solution lies in a little bit of both, but when one is set in ones ways of dealing with the opposite sex, how should we handle the here and now? Analyze, but not too much? Ask for clarification?
Do we take a leap of faith? Ultimately, I think that's what we do every day of our lives and with every "hey" we encounter.
First, I'm guilty of overanalyzing every action, every word, every look. I tend to make each one mean more than it probably does. "Hey" does not mean "Hey lets walk down the aisle and get married," it's just plain old "hey, i'm acknowledging your existence, be grateful." Secondly, my thoughts run rampant and I often find myself planning the relationship in my mind before it even gets the chance to plan itself. I set unrealistic expections which obviously do not pan out and I end up bummed because said guy did not turn out the way I had imagined. These two examples are extremely detrimental when in the dating game, and I find myself handicapped because of these qualities (should they even be called such?) that I possess.
Now, I know men seem to think that we women are a "mystery" and you can never "figure us out" but I have only this to say to the men: right back at you. You're just as confusing and complicated! However, I do wonder if you ever overanalyze and pre-plan as much as we do. Do you lay in your bed at night and thoughtfully consider actions and voice inflections? Do you dream about flying away to Paris or Italy for a romantic getaway? Somehow, I think not. I'm pretty sure you lay awake in your bed doing other things that really have no relevance to whether we're in the physically picture or not. Though I'm sure it is much more pleasureable if we're there.
Regardless of physicality, do men put as much emotional time and effort into relationships as women? If not, why not? Why does it often seem that a woman is much more "into the relationship" than a man is? What do men think about when it comes to relationships, do they ponder the emotional depths or do they just take things as they come? I think the solution lies in a little bit of both, but when one is set in ones ways of dealing with the opposite sex, how should we handle the here and now? Analyze, but not too much? Ask for clarification?
Do we take a leap of faith? Ultimately, I think that's what we do every day of our lives and with every "hey" we encounter.