(no subject)
i keep checking my email hoping he replied.
that is so silly. i am the most fun, cool person who acts so confident and says whatever the fuck i want when i want, but i obsess and melt over the boys. but only the one right now. there are boys here that i really like talking to and am having so much fun with. but it's hard to forget about him. i miss him a lot. i want to talk to him and all i get are these fucking emails that take like a week for him to respond to. i have to force myself to wait to respond to his so i don't seem desperate when it takes him like 4 days. it took me 3 days to respond to the first one and he said "i'm glad you responded so rapidly" is that rapid?!
i just want a little tiny back and forth with him
it's so hard for me to find boys who like the weird things about me. and there are so many. and he likes those things. and i like the weird things about him. sometimes i'm a really gross person and i felt comfortable being that way. and absence is making my heart grow fonder. but i want to know he misses me. and will make an effort to talk to me. and things about me sometimes during the day and thinks life would be just a little bit better if i were there.
and if it is easy for him that i'm gone, i want it to be easy for me to be gone. unfortunately i'm the obsessive one who analyzes everything.
i feel like we finally opened up to each other like a day before i left.
and i don't get catherine right now. i sensed that she didn't like how my life changed while she was gone. my social world shifted without her. no longer did i need her to hang out with people. i made a lot of friends and hung out with many different people all the time. our friendship was so rooted in needing each other and spending all our time together. i still need her. but i mean i'm glad i fucking made all these friends cause she now has a boyfriend she spends all her time with. i would've been left out in the cold. but we also tell each other everything. and she's not.
i miss her. i miss being inseperable.
this is just an alone at 2 in the morning rant. i'm actually having a seriously amazing time.
paris in 2 days.
that is so silly. i am the most fun, cool person who acts so confident and says whatever the fuck i want when i want, but i obsess and melt over the boys. but only the one right now. there are boys here that i really like talking to and am having so much fun with. but it's hard to forget about him. i miss him a lot. i want to talk to him and all i get are these fucking emails that take like a week for him to respond to. i have to force myself to wait to respond to his so i don't seem desperate when it takes him like 4 days. it took me 3 days to respond to the first one and he said "i'm glad you responded so rapidly" is that rapid?!
i just want a little tiny back and forth with him
it's so hard for me to find boys who like the weird things about me. and there are so many. and he likes those things. and i like the weird things about him. sometimes i'm a really gross person and i felt comfortable being that way. and absence is making my heart grow fonder. but i want to know he misses me. and will make an effort to talk to me. and things about me sometimes during the day and thinks life would be just a little bit better if i were there.
and if it is easy for him that i'm gone, i want it to be easy for me to be gone. unfortunately i'm the obsessive one who analyzes everything.
i feel like we finally opened up to each other like a day before i left.
and i don't get catherine right now. i sensed that she didn't like how my life changed while she was gone. my social world shifted without her. no longer did i need her to hang out with people. i made a lot of friends and hung out with many different people all the time. our friendship was so rooted in needing each other and spending all our time together. i still need her. but i mean i'm glad i fucking made all these friends cause she now has a boyfriend she spends all her time with. i would've been left out in the cold. but we also tell each other everything. and she's not.
i miss her. i miss being inseperable.
this is just an alone at 2 in the morning rant. i'm actually having a seriously amazing time.
paris in 2 days.