drunk
im drunk right now
and just basically typing shit
im home alone.
T isnt here
do i like josh? i dunno
maybe it's just the alcohol running through me making me think things
desire definately wanted to jump him
but he needed to get home to do his woman
whatever woman that may be tonight
i already know i will never be more than a friend though
always the case
always will be
some girl tonight said we looked cute together
and that josh was totally checking me out
YEAH RIGHT!
i know josh
he wouldnt do that
at least... not me
just random occurances
always has been
maybe it's better that way?
why cant i just settle down?
kind of boring i guess
ugh
i hate myself sometimes
i hate being a selfish whore
donovan wants me, ricky wants me , tony wants me, brian wants me...
i dont want any of them
nobody i want, wants me back
am i that ugly?
that annoying?
that selfish?
i like to think im nice
maybe im really not.
im dressed up
nowhere to go
nothing to do but sit here
typing
feeling sorry for myself
i need to stop
in times like this, i cant help it
i hate you terrence
i hate you josh
the shit you both put me through
its just the alcohol talking
i hope
empty
that's all i feel lately
just empty
nobody to fill that void anymore
nobody wants to fill it
they just run
scared of commitment?
or just scared of me?
i have a heart
maybe you're the ones that dont
it gets broken very easily
though you dont care
you never seem to
its just MY heart
other things are important
im not loved by my family
not loved by anyone else
just a fading picture in the background
this self loathing thing is getting old
nobody wants to read this shit
not even me
why do i have to be me?
and just basically typing shit
im home alone.
T isnt here
do i like josh? i dunno
maybe it's just the alcohol running through me making me think things
desire definately wanted to jump him
but he needed to get home to do his woman
whatever woman that may be tonight
i already know i will never be more than a friend though
always the case
always will be
some girl tonight said we looked cute together
and that josh was totally checking me out
YEAH RIGHT!
i know josh
he wouldnt do that
at least... not me
just random occurances
always has been
maybe it's better that way?
why cant i just settle down?
kind of boring i guess
ugh
i hate myself sometimes
i hate being a selfish whore
donovan wants me, ricky wants me , tony wants me, brian wants me...
i dont want any of them
nobody i want, wants me back
am i that ugly?
that annoying?
that selfish?
i like to think im nice
maybe im really not.
im dressed up
nowhere to go
nothing to do but sit here
typing
feeling sorry for myself
i need to stop
in times like this, i cant help it
i hate you terrence
i hate you josh
the shit you both put me through
its just the alcohol talking
i hope
empty
that's all i feel lately
just empty
nobody to fill that void anymore
nobody wants to fill it
they just run
scared of commitment?
or just scared of me?
i have a heart
maybe you're the ones that dont
it gets broken very easily
though you dont care
you never seem to
its just MY heart
other things are important
im not loved by my family
not loved by anyone else
just a fading picture in the background
this self loathing thing is getting old
nobody wants to read this shit
not even me
why do i have to be me?