Monster (chapter 13/?)
Title: Monster
Author: Me ^.^
Pairing: Masuda/Tegoshi
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Summary: They were practically coming from two different worlds, one of them wealthy and happy, the other one scarred and full of hate. Despite that fact, they would still meet, breaking the rules and moral of the society with their relationship.
Notes: English is not my native language, I’m doing my best to not make mistakes ^.^
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10
Chapter 11 Chapter 12
*~*~*~*~*~*
Why did this happen? They had been fine, hadn’t they? Even Masuda’s parents had approved of Tegoshi, so why? Why did Tegoshi’s father have to drag his son into his own dirty business? Masuda still couldn’t understand it, none of it. Why couldn’t he and Tegoshi just be allowed to be happy? There wasn’t an answer to that question, and Masuda buried his face in his hands, sighing deeply. It didn’t matter how much effort he put into it; the sad, crushed expression he had seen on Tegoshi’s face earlier was like etched in his mind, unwilling to disappear. They boy had been crushed, to say at least, broken again. Masuda understood why, his dad’s message had been pretty clear, and illegal drug-business was definitely categorized as trouble. He didn’t know that much about the organization Tegoshi’s parents were working for though, and Tegoshi hadn’t been in the state of telling him the day before. Masuda’s heart still hurt when he thought about it; Tegoshi crying like that in his arms, shaking like his life was about to end. The boy was scared, scared to the point where he wasn’t even able to keep his badass-attitude up. Masuda knew why, even though Tegoshi hadn’t told him anything about it. He knew that it was because of him, because of the risk of them getting separated. For a person like Tegoshi who had never been loved like this before, getting separated from the one person that actually did love him had to be the most painful thing possible. Not that Masuda planned to leave him, it wasn’t even an option. But if Masuda’s parents got scent of this, they wouldn’t approve of Tegoshi anymore, something that would mean that Masuda probably wouldn’t be able to the by Tegoshi’s side as much as the boy needed. All they could hope for was for things to get solved smooth and easy. Masuda rose and scratched his head, looking out at the schoolyard from the roof of the building. He had gone there quite early because he needed some time to think alone, to try to find a solution. But to sit there in the chilly breeze hadn’t helped him the slightest, and his problems still remained. He didn’t want his classes to start; there was no way he would be able to concentrate when he had more important things to think about. But things wouldn’t get better if he skipped it, and Masuda slowly made his way down the stairs from the roof, sighing deeply when reaching the right floor. There were a big group of people standing by the lockers, and Masuda’s stomach twisted when he understood whose locker they were surrounding. He pushed through the crowd, finding Tegoshi, staring in front of himself. Masuda followed his gaze and it felt like his heart stopped beating for a moment when he saw the picture someone had put up on the boy’s locker, depicting a girl, smiling happily. Under the picture, the word ‘MURDERER’ was written with big, red characters. Masuda looked at Tegoshi, his heart aching when he saw the boy’s expression, shocked and empty. The anger was burning in Masuda’s heart, and he turned around quickly, staring at the crowd surrounding them. “Who did this?” No one answered; they just stared nervously at him. “Who the hell did this?”
One of the girls answered this time, staring angrily at Masuda, tears glancing in the corners of her eyes. “But it’s true, isn’t it? He killed her! If it wasn’t for that monster, she would still have lived!”
Masuda just looked at the girl, his stomach twisting. “What do you mean?”
The girl stared in Tegoshi’s direction, her eyes showing only despite. “Why don’t you ask him?”
Masuda turned his head to look at Tegoshi and could see how the boy fought the tears. Masuda grabbed his wrist and pushed through the crowd, trying to find a place were they could get some privacy. While they walked, Masuda could hear how Tegoshi sobbed softly behind him, and it broke his heart. After a lot of searching, they finally found an empty classroom, and Masuda was fast to shut the door behind them, locking it. He turned to Tegoshi, trying to meet his gaze. “Yuya, what was all that about?”
Tegoshi just shook his head, tears streaming down his cheeks. “Yuya.”
Tegoshi sobbed loudly before he threw his arms around Masuda’s neck, burying his face in his chest. “Yuya, you know you can tell me.”
Tegoshi was shaking, tightening his grip around Masuda. “I…I didn’t kill her…I promise…But I…I didn’t even realize that it was her death-anniversary today.” His voice was shaky when he spoke, and Masuda patted his back gently, holding him tight. “I believe you. But why do they blame you?”
Tegoshi shook his head, sobbing softly. “It’s okay; tell me when you’re ready.”
Tegoshi sobbed, pulling back and wiping his cheek with a sleeve. “There was a gang I used to hang out with; you know the type, delinquents and people that just don’t seem to fit in. Some of them were taking drugs, something I was well aware of, but didn’t care all that much about; I thought it was their problem, not mine.”
Masuda nodded, grabbing Tegoshi’s hand, squeezing it lightly. “Go on.”
Tegoshi nodded, taking a deep breath to steady his voice. “Like I said, I let them be. I tried to avoid conflict by doing that, even though I knew that the things they were doing were dangerous.”
“What happened?”
Tegoshi’s gaze dropped. “She was in that group too, the girl on the picture.”
Masuda nodded, squeezing Tegoshi’s hand. “We were on a party, I was there as well. There were a lot of drugs there, alcohol too. She must have been taking an excessive amount of something and…collapsed at first, not long after…passing away.”
Masuda embraced Tegoshi tightly when they boy started to cry again, sobbing and shaking. “They didn’t even have time to call after an ambulance before she was gone…”
Masuda tightened his grip around Tegoshi, drawing his fingers through his hair to comfort him. “But then it wasn’t your fault at all.”
Tegoshi shook his head, digging his nails into Masuda’s shirt. “The one selling them the drugs…were my father. If I had known, I would have been able to stop him, and she wouldn’t have…”
“Shhh. He was the one at fault, not you. Don’t ever think that she died because of you.”
“They were blaming me. Her friends, everyone who had been there; they were all saying it was because of me.”
Masuda gritted his teeth. “But you’re not the one to blame.”
“I still feel guilty.”
Masuda patted his back lightly. “Don’t. You’re not your father; you’re not even like him.”
“I guess they needed someone to blame. They didn’t even know my father’s name since he’d kept that a secret, and they needed someone to hate because she died. Since I’m his son, I was pretty suited for that role.”
“That’s not fair.”
Tegoshi sighed, snuggling closer to Masuda. “That’s life.”
Masuda didn’t know what to say, and just held Tegoshi tight, like it was the only thing he could do. Tegoshi buried his face in the crook of Masuda’s neck, sobbing quietly. “Taka, I’m tired of this. I don’t want to let that man destroy any more lives.”
“There’s nothing you can do more than keeping out of it.”
“There is.”
Masuda pulled back a bit, meeting Tegoshi’s gaze. “There is?”
Tegoshi shook his head, waving his hand. “No, you’re right. I can’t do anything more than keeping out of their business, right?”
Masuda felt his stomach twisting, and he grabbed Tegoshi’s hand, squeezing it lightly. “Yuya, you know you can be honest with me.”
Tegoshi looked at him, nodding. “I am.”
“Why do I get the feeling that you’re hiding something from me then?”
Tegoshi looked down a bit. “I’m not.”
“Really?”
“I promise.”
But still, Masuda couldn’t get that uncomfortable feeling out of his gut. He embraced Tegoshi tightly, caressing his back. “I don’t want you to do something dangerous and reckless.”
Tegoshi wrapped his arms around Masuda’s waist, leaning his head on his shoulder. “I won’t.”
****
He had to hide it from Masuda. He had to hide the fact that he once and for all was going to cut bonds with his family and their business. If he told Masuda about it, there was no way he would be able to carry out his plan, therefore he had to keep it a secret. It was for Masuda’s sake; Tegoshi didn’t want to worry him, something he would most definitely do if he knew. He felt bad for lying, but he really hadn’t lied either, it was more like…hiding the truth. It was anyhow necessary to do if he wanted to do this. Truth to be told, he didn’t want to, because it would be dangerous, but he had to do it. The thing that happening a few days ago had reminded him how much he hated drugs, how many life they were destroying. Therefore, he wouldn’t allow himself to be a link in a rotten network anymore. No matter the costs; he would break free. Confronting the higher-ups in the company was maybe not the most risk-free way, but it would probably be the most effective. He grabbed the paper-bag his dad had left for him a couple of days before and headed towards the door. No, he couldn’t do this just yet. There was one thing he had to do before confronting his enemies, a thing he just couldn’t ignore. Tegoshi slowly took his cell-phone out from his pocket, dialling that familiar number, holding the phone to his ear, waiting for an answer. “Hello?”
Tegoshi smiled when hearing Masuda’s voice. “Taka, it’s me.”
“Ohh, Yuya. Something’s wrong?”
“Nope. I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“Ahh, I see.”
Tegoshi bit his lip, his stomach already twisting. “Taka…I love you.”
He could hear Masuda laugh quietly on the other side. “What’s that so suddenly?”
“I…I wanted to tell you. Because I really love you, Takahisa.”
“Is something’s wrong?” Tegoshi could hear that Masuda was worried, and took a deep breath to stable his voice. “Everything’s fine. I just wanted to talk to you, and tell you how much I love you. And it’s something you can’t hear enough, right?”
“You’re right. But my mom calls for me, I have to go.”
“Okay…Bye.”
“Bye.”
“I love you, Taka.”
“I love you too.”
Tegoshi had to bit his lip hard in order to not start crying, and he managed to hold the tears back. He couldn’t get sentimental yet; he had to be strong and firm to be able to do this. It wasn’t a goodbye; he would get through this. With that thought, he put his phone back in his pocket, grabbed the paper-bag, and made his way out, heading towards the headquarters of that despicable organization, not having a clue whether he would be able to return from there or not.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Thanks for all the kind comments on the previous chapter <3 I have a bad habit of losing all of my confidence if no one tells me that I’m good at something, but I’ll try to work on it! But thanks anyway, for rising my confidence with your kind words ^.^
This fic is moving towards the final now…I guess there will be like 2 or 3 more chaps, I haven’t decided yet ^.^
Ohhh, and even if it may be a bit early(or late), happy birthday yuukarin ! <3
That’s all, thanks for reading ^.^<3
Author: Me ^.^
Pairing: Masuda/Tegoshi
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Summary: They were practically coming from two different worlds, one of them wealthy and happy, the other one scarred and full of hate. Despite that fact, they would still meet, breaking the rules and moral of the society with their relationship.
Notes: English is not my native language, I’m doing my best to not make mistakes ^.^
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6 Chapter 7 Chapter 8 Chapter 9 Chapter 10
Chapter 11 Chapter 12
*~*~*~*~*~*
Why did this happen? They had been fine, hadn’t they? Even Masuda’s parents had approved of Tegoshi, so why? Why did Tegoshi’s father have to drag his son into his own dirty business? Masuda still couldn’t understand it, none of it. Why couldn’t he and Tegoshi just be allowed to be happy? There wasn’t an answer to that question, and Masuda buried his face in his hands, sighing deeply. It didn’t matter how much effort he put into it; the sad, crushed expression he had seen on Tegoshi’s face earlier was like etched in his mind, unwilling to disappear. They boy had been crushed, to say at least, broken again. Masuda understood why, his dad’s message had been pretty clear, and illegal drug-business was definitely categorized as trouble. He didn’t know that much about the organization Tegoshi’s parents were working for though, and Tegoshi hadn’t been in the state of telling him the day before. Masuda’s heart still hurt when he thought about it; Tegoshi crying like that in his arms, shaking like his life was about to end. The boy was scared, scared to the point where he wasn’t even able to keep his badass-attitude up. Masuda knew why, even though Tegoshi hadn’t told him anything about it. He knew that it was because of him, because of the risk of them getting separated. For a person like Tegoshi who had never been loved like this before, getting separated from the one person that actually did love him had to be the most painful thing possible. Not that Masuda planned to leave him, it wasn’t even an option. But if Masuda’s parents got scent of this, they wouldn’t approve of Tegoshi anymore, something that would mean that Masuda probably wouldn’t be able to the by Tegoshi’s side as much as the boy needed. All they could hope for was for things to get solved smooth and easy. Masuda rose and scratched his head, looking out at the schoolyard from the roof of the building. He had gone there quite early because he needed some time to think alone, to try to find a solution. But to sit there in the chilly breeze hadn’t helped him the slightest, and his problems still remained. He didn’t want his classes to start; there was no way he would be able to concentrate when he had more important things to think about. But things wouldn’t get better if he skipped it, and Masuda slowly made his way down the stairs from the roof, sighing deeply when reaching the right floor. There were a big group of people standing by the lockers, and Masuda’s stomach twisted when he understood whose locker they were surrounding. He pushed through the crowd, finding Tegoshi, staring in front of himself. Masuda followed his gaze and it felt like his heart stopped beating for a moment when he saw the picture someone had put up on the boy’s locker, depicting a girl, smiling happily. Under the picture, the word ‘MURDERER’ was written with big, red characters. Masuda looked at Tegoshi, his heart aching when he saw the boy’s expression, shocked and empty. The anger was burning in Masuda’s heart, and he turned around quickly, staring at the crowd surrounding them. “Who did this?” No one answered; they just stared nervously at him. “Who the hell did this?”
One of the girls answered this time, staring angrily at Masuda, tears glancing in the corners of her eyes. “But it’s true, isn’t it? He killed her! If it wasn’t for that monster, she would still have lived!”
Masuda just looked at the girl, his stomach twisting. “What do you mean?”
The girl stared in Tegoshi’s direction, her eyes showing only despite. “Why don’t you ask him?”
Masuda turned his head to look at Tegoshi and could see how the boy fought the tears. Masuda grabbed his wrist and pushed through the crowd, trying to find a place were they could get some privacy. While they walked, Masuda could hear how Tegoshi sobbed softly behind him, and it broke his heart. After a lot of searching, they finally found an empty classroom, and Masuda was fast to shut the door behind them, locking it. He turned to Tegoshi, trying to meet his gaze. “Yuya, what was all that about?”
Tegoshi just shook his head, tears streaming down his cheeks. “Yuya.”
Tegoshi sobbed loudly before he threw his arms around Masuda’s neck, burying his face in his chest. “Yuya, you know you can tell me.”
Tegoshi was shaking, tightening his grip around Masuda. “I…I didn’t kill her…I promise…But I…I didn’t even realize that it was her death-anniversary today.” His voice was shaky when he spoke, and Masuda patted his back gently, holding him tight. “I believe you. But why do they blame you?”
Tegoshi shook his head, sobbing softly. “It’s okay; tell me when you’re ready.”
Tegoshi sobbed, pulling back and wiping his cheek with a sleeve. “There was a gang I used to hang out with; you know the type, delinquents and people that just don’t seem to fit in. Some of them were taking drugs, something I was well aware of, but didn’t care all that much about; I thought it was their problem, not mine.”
Masuda nodded, grabbing Tegoshi’s hand, squeezing it lightly. “Go on.”
Tegoshi nodded, taking a deep breath to steady his voice. “Like I said, I let them be. I tried to avoid conflict by doing that, even though I knew that the things they were doing were dangerous.”
“What happened?”
Tegoshi’s gaze dropped. “She was in that group too, the girl on the picture.”
Masuda nodded, squeezing Tegoshi’s hand. “We were on a party, I was there as well. There were a lot of drugs there, alcohol too. She must have been taking an excessive amount of something and…collapsed at first, not long after…passing away.”
Masuda embraced Tegoshi tightly when they boy started to cry again, sobbing and shaking. “They didn’t even have time to call after an ambulance before she was gone…”
Masuda tightened his grip around Tegoshi, drawing his fingers through his hair to comfort him. “But then it wasn’t your fault at all.”
Tegoshi shook his head, digging his nails into Masuda’s shirt. “The one selling them the drugs…were my father. If I had known, I would have been able to stop him, and she wouldn’t have…”
“Shhh. He was the one at fault, not you. Don’t ever think that she died because of you.”
“They were blaming me. Her friends, everyone who had been there; they were all saying it was because of me.”
Masuda gritted his teeth. “But you’re not the one to blame.”
“I still feel guilty.”
Masuda patted his back lightly. “Don’t. You’re not your father; you’re not even like him.”
“I guess they needed someone to blame. They didn’t even know my father’s name since he’d kept that a secret, and they needed someone to hate because she died. Since I’m his son, I was pretty suited for that role.”
“That’s not fair.”
Tegoshi sighed, snuggling closer to Masuda. “That’s life.”
Masuda didn’t know what to say, and just held Tegoshi tight, like it was the only thing he could do. Tegoshi buried his face in the crook of Masuda’s neck, sobbing quietly. “Taka, I’m tired of this. I don’t want to let that man destroy any more lives.”
“There’s nothing you can do more than keeping out of it.”
“There is.”
Masuda pulled back a bit, meeting Tegoshi’s gaze. “There is?”
Tegoshi shook his head, waving his hand. “No, you’re right. I can’t do anything more than keeping out of their business, right?”
Masuda felt his stomach twisting, and he grabbed Tegoshi’s hand, squeezing it lightly. “Yuya, you know you can be honest with me.”
Tegoshi looked at him, nodding. “I am.”
“Why do I get the feeling that you’re hiding something from me then?”
Tegoshi looked down a bit. “I’m not.”
“Really?”
“I promise.”
But still, Masuda couldn’t get that uncomfortable feeling out of his gut. He embraced Tegoshi tightly, caressing his back. “I don’t want you to do something dangerous and reckless.”
Tegoshi wrapped his arms around Masuda’s waist, leaning his head on his shoulder. “I won’t.”
****
He had to hide it from Masuda. He had to hide the fact that he once and for all was going to cut bonds with his family and their business. If he told Masuda about it, there was no way he would be able to carry out his plan, therefore he had to keep it a secret. It was for Masuda’s sake; Tegoshi didn’t want to worry him, something he would most definitely do if he knew. He felt bad for lying, but he really hadn’t lied either, it was more like…hiding the truth. It was anyhow necessary to do if he wanted to do this. Truth to be told, he didn’t want to, because it would be dangerous, but he had to do it. The thing that happening a few days ago had reminded him how much he hated drugs, how many life they were destroying. Therefore, he wouldn’t allow himself to be a link in a rotten network anymore. No matter the costs; he would break free. Confronting the higher-ups in the company was maybe not the most risk-free way, but it would probably be the most effective. He grabbed the paper-bag his dad had left for him a couple of days before and headed towards the door. No, he couldn’t do this just yet. There was one thing he had to do before confronting his enemies, a thing he just couldn’t ignore. Tegoshi slowly took his cell-phone out from his pocket, dialling that familiar number, holding the phone to his ear, waiting for an answer. “Hello?”
Tegoshi smiled when hearing Masuda’s voice. “Taka, it’s me.”
“Ohh, Yuya. Something’s wrong?”
“Nope. I just wanted to hear your voice.”
“Ahh, I see.”
Tegoshi bit his lip, his stomach already twisting. “Taka…I love you.”
He could hear Masuda laugh quietly on the other side. “What’s that so suddenly?”
“I…I wanted to tell you. Because I really love you, Takahisa.”
“Is something’s wrong?” Tegoshi could hear that Masuda was worried, and took a deep breath to stable his voice. “Everything’s fine. I just wanted to talk to you, and tell you how much I love you. And it’s something you can’t hear enough, right?”
“You’re right. But my mom calls for me, I have to go.”
“Okay…Bye.”
“Bye.”
“I love you, Taka.”
“I love you too.”
Tegoshi had to bit his lip hard in order to not start crying, and he managed to hold the tears back. He couldn’t get sentimental yet; he had to be strong and firm to be able to do this. It wasn’t a goodbye; he would get through this. With that thought, he put his phone back in his pocket, grabbed the paper-bag, and made his way out, heading towards the headquarters of that despicable organization, not having a clue whether he would be able to return from there or not.
*~*~*~*~*~*
Thanks for all the kind comments on the previous chapter <3 I have a bad habit of losing all of my confidence if no one tells me that I’m good at something, but I’ll try to work on it! But thanks anyway, for rising my confidence with your kind words ^.^
This fic is moving towards the final now…I guess there will be like 2 or 3 more chaps, I haven’t decided yet ^.^
Ohhh, and even if it may be a bit early(or late), happy birthday yuukarin ! <3
That’s all, thanks for reading ^.^<3