Monster (chapter 7/?)
Title: Monster
Author: Me ^.^
Pairing: Masuda/Tegoshi
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Summary: They were practically coming from two different worlds, one of them wealthy and happy, the other one scarred and full of hate. Despite that fact, they would still meet, breaking the rules and moral of the society with their relationship.
Notes: English is not my native language, I’m doing my best to not make mistakes ^.^
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
*~*~*~*~*~*
It should feel weird. It should feel awkward. It should feel wrong. But it didn’t. There wasn’t even a trace of these feelings in Masuda’s heart; the only thing he felt was that special tingle in his stomach, a feeling that surely wasn’t a bad one. It felt natural and right, his lips pressed against Tegoshi’s like this, the boy clinging on tightly to his waist, not wanting him to let go. Masuda hadn’t planned things to end up like this, but he surely didn’t have anything against it. Shige had made him realize how much he loved Tegoshi, that he didn’t want to lose him, ever. No matter what, Masuda wanted to be by his side. A quiet groan escaped from his lips when Tegoshi pulled away, breaking their kiss. He just stared at Masuda, eyes wide and still a bit teary. “Taka…why?”
Masuda giggled nervously and pointed at the door. “We should go inside, we’re both totally soaked.”
Tegoshi nodded, and tried to unlock the door with shaky hands. Masuda took the key from his hands and unlocked the door by himself, opening it and smiling towards Tegoshi. When Tegoshi had walked inside, Masuda followed, closing the door behind them. Tegoshi looked really uncomfortable, fiddling with the sleeves of his damp uniform, gaze resting on the floor. Masuda squeezed his shoulder lightly. “Yuya, is something wrong?”
Tegoshi turned his head, his teary eyes meeting Masuda’s. “Taka…I…”
His shaky voice made Masuda’s heart ache. Tegoshi suddenly looked more vulnerable than ever before for some reason, and Masuda hated to see him like that. “I’m sorry for suddenly kissing you like that…”
Tegoshi gazed at him, shaking his head. Masuda turned around, cheeks becoming hotter than he had wanted them to. He started to dig through a drawer to find some dry clothes for them, just wanting to do something in order to not let the awkwardness in the room stifle him. When two small arms wrapped around his waist from behind, he felt how his heart skipped a couple of beats.
“Taka, I…I love you.” There wasn’t any confidence in Tegoshi’s voice, it was like he didn’t believe in his feelings at all, or didn’t believe that they would ever get answered. “Does Takahisa love me too?”
Masuda smiled and turned around to meet Tegoshi’s worried eyes. “I do.”
Tegoshi looked relieved, and smiled slightly. “Will you say it?”
Masuda leaned their foreheads together and grabbed Tegoshi’s hand. “I love you.”
“Say it again.”
“I love you.”
Masuda could hear Tegoshi sob softly and squeezed his hand. “Aren’t you happy?”
Tegoshi shook his head. “Of course I’m happy…But at the same time I’m so scared…”
Masuda wasn’t late to wrap his arms around the boy and holding him close. “There’s nothing to be scared of.”
Tegoshi leaned his cheek in Masuda’s shoulder. “Don’t take it the wrong way. I’m so happy that you love me, but I’m just as scared that you will hurt me or leave me all alone. Everything people have done to me is to hurt me; I don’t know how to love at all.”
Masuda kissed his temple and caressed his back. “I won’t leave you, that are for sure.”
“How can I trust such words? Humans aren’t to be trusted, they always betray each other.”
Masuda didn’t know what to answer. “That’s indeed true.” He pulled back a bit, enough to be able to meet Tegoshi’s gaze. “But there are people you can trust. I want you to be able to trust me. It may take time, but I will show you that you’ll be able to trust me.”
Tegoshi wiped away some tears from his cheek and smiled slightly. “Takahisa is the only person in the world whom I trust, even if it’s just a little bit.”
Masuda patted his head. “That’s good.”
“Hey, Taka.”
“What?”
“I’m freezing.”
Masuda laughed lightly. “Yeah, right, we should change clothes.”
Tegoshi looked down, cheeks taking a shade of pink. “Will you stay here with me tonight?”
Masuda looked at him for a moment before smiling. “If that’s what you want.”
Tegoshi smiled widely and placed a kiss on Masuda’s cheek. “I love you.”
Masuda giggled. “I didn’t think that you would be this…clingy. And romantic”
Tegoshi backed away and pouted. “I just never got the chance to be.”
Masuda embraced him warmly again. “It’s a good thing.”
Tegoshi just silently wrapped his arms around Masuda’s waist and buried his face in his shoulder. “Taka won’t leave me, right?”
“I won’t.”
“Even when you get to know about the terrible things I’ve done?”
“I don’t know that before you tell me”
Tegoshi tightened his grip. “I don’t want Taka to leave me.”
Masuda patted the back of his head lightly. “I won’t leave you. I love you; nothing will change that fact, ever.”
Tegoshi giggled softly, it made Masuda’s heart beat faster. “Taka loves me.”
Masuda smiled. “Taka loves you.”
****
There was something relaxing about all this, lying beside Masuda, just watching him sleep and listen to his steady breaths. Tegoshi could have spent the entire day like that, just be close to the person he loved and not think about the rotten world outside. He didn’t want to live like a delinquent anymore, Masuda would be sad if he did. Maybe he had found a reason now, a reason to take his life in his own hands and stop doing stupid things. Yes, Masuda was reason enough, that was for sure, now he just needed the courage. To leave a delinquent group wouldn’t go painlessly and smooth, rather on the contrary. But it had to be done, if he wanted to take a hold of his life now when he had the reason to. It was best no not tell Masuda too many details, he would just get worried anyway. Tegoshi moved closer to Masuda and snuggled an arm around his waist, burying his face in the crook of his neck. He could feel the boy shift position and groan quietly when he fell out of his sweet slumber. Tegoshi smiled. “Good morning, Taka.”
Masuda yawned. “Good morning. Slept well?”
Tegoshi nodded. “The company made it a lot more enjoyable.”
Masuda giggled softly and kissed Tegoshi’s hair. “I can’t disagree.”
Tegoshi was quiet for a moment before kissing Masuda’s collarbone softly. “Hey, Taka…I…I want to be serious about you.”
Masuda laughed quietly. “What do you mean?”
Tegoshi bit his lip. “I really, really love you. I want to be a good boyfriend for Takahisa, so I’ve decided one thing.”
Masuda nodded. “What thing?”
“I’ve decided that I will stop being a delinquent. I want to leave that group I’m a part of and start living a real life.”
Masuda sat up, looking Tegoshi in the eye. “Seriously?”
Tegoshi nodded. “I have a reason now, it wasn’t worth it when I was alone, but now I have you. I want to be worthy of you.”
Masuda was just staring at him, a touch of sadness in his eyes. “What’s wrong, Taka?”
Masuda tried to smile, but Tegoshi noticed that it was just pressed and unnatural. “Boyfriend, you say…” Tegoshi nodded slightly, his heart aching slightly when seeing Masuda’s expression, troubled and sad.
“I wonder if it’s possible for us to be like that…”
Tegoshi bit his lip, trying to hold back the tears that were dangerously close to escape from the corners of his eyes. Masuda noticed it, and laughed nervously. “I don’t mean that I don’t want to! It’s just…I don’t know.”
Tegoshi sat up and shook his head slightly, trying to steady his voice enough to speak. “It’s okay, I get it. I’m not the kind of person you want to show off to your friends and family, am I right?”
Masuda seemed to hesitate, but nodded shortly. It broke Tegoshi’s heart, but he managed to force a laugh. “Well, that’s obvious, isn’t it? I mean, it’s me after all. I wouldn’t want to bring someone like me home to meet my family.”
Masuda grabbed Tegoshi’s hand and squeezed it lightly. “Yuya…”
Tegoshi managed to force a smile, but it surely didn’t turn out to be convincing. “Its okay, Taka, don’t worry. If you want to, we could still see each other like this, right? Just like we have done up until now, just seeing each other kind of secretly.”
Masuda looked down, but nodded after a while. “I’m sorry, Yuya. I really am.”
Tegoshi shook his head. “Its fine, I told you. I’m happy just to have you loving me; it’s more than I’ve ever wished for.” I was only half true, though, but what else could he say? It just had to be like this. He couldn’t expect more, at least not at the moment.
Happy laughs. Kids running around, playing with each other. Couples in love that enjoyed the warm and sunny weather. Tegoshi watched them all, sitting on a bench in the park that law nearby his home. He should be happy, he knew that very well, but he just couldn’t. Masuda’s feelings for him should be enough, but somehow it hurt like hell to know that Masuda probably didn’t love him enough to show it to the world. It was quite obvious that he didn’t want to, and Tegoshi understood why, but it didn’t hurt any less because of that. But then again, he just had to become a person Masuda could be proud of, a person Masuda wouldn’t be ashamed to show off to people. Maybe it was impossible, but he had to try. Tegoshi sighed before rising, walking away slowly, his head still filled with thoughts of the depressing kind. He walked past the convenience store and wondered if he should stop by and buy something for dinner. When he was about to enter the store, someone called his name. Tegoshi turned his head and saw a gang of guys, and he knew them all too well.
“Hey, Tegoshi. Wanna hang out a bit?”
Now or never, this was it. “No thanks. I want to quit.”
The tallest guy, Suzuki, the leader of the gang stared at him. “Pardon?”
Tegoshi looked back with a fierce look in his eyes. “I want to quit. I have better things to do than just beating people up without a reason.”
He got only a laugh in response. “I forgot that you’ve become a good boy lately, even saving some fatso from Okamoto.”
Tegoshi gritted his teeth. “He’s not fat.”
Suzuki laughed loudly. “Oh, Tegoshi, don’t tell me he turns you on.”
Tegoshi just stared angrily, trying to keep himself under control. The guy laughed. “I’ve always thought that you had that kind of look, but I didn’t think that you actually were a fag.” He moved closer to Tegoshi, smirking. “Tell me, does it feel good to have his cock showed up your ass?”
Tegoshi gritted his teeth, but didn’t move his gaze an inch. “Try it by yourself and you’ll get to know, bastard. And for your information, I haven’t even slept with him.”
The other guy’s expression wasn’t pleased, and Tegoshi smiled slightly. “Anyway, I don’t want to be a part of this rotten gathering of people anymore.”
“You think you can walk away just like that?”
Tegoshi stared the guy in the eyes. “Who are you to stop me?”
Suzuki laughed condescendingly. “You shouldn’t underestimate you enemy, Tegoshi.”
Tegoshi was just going to spit a poisonous comment in his face, but before he was able to, he felt a sudden pain in the back of his head. He stumbled forward a bit before falling, his vision turning black when he hit the ground.
*~*~*~*~*~*
This was supposed to be done earlier, but I just didn’t have the motivation. I'll do my best to update more often when I get my summer-break in less than two weeks ^.^
Thanks for reading ^.^<3333
Author: Me ^.^
Pairing: Masuda/Tegoshi
Rating: PG-13
Genre: Angst
Summary: They were practically coming from two different worlds, one of them wealthy and happy, the other one scarred and full of hate. Despite that fact, they would still meet, breaking the rules and moral of the society with their relationship.
Notes: English is not my native language, I’m doing my best to not make mistakes ^.^
Chapter 1 Chapter 2 Chapter 3 Chapter 4 Chapter 5 Chapter 6
*~*~*~*~*~*
It should feel weird. It should feel awkward. It should feel wrong. But it didn’t. There wasn’t even a trace of these feelings in Masuda’s heart; the only thing he felt was that special tingle in his stomach, a feeling that surely wasn’t a bad one. It felt natural and right, his lips pressed against Tegoshi’s like this, the boy clinging on tightly to his waist, not wanting him to let go. Masuda hadn’t planned things to end up like this, but he surely didn’t have anything against it. Shige had made him realize how much he loved Tegoshi, that he didn’t want to lose him, ever. No matter what, Masuda wanted to be by his side. A quiet groan escaped from his lips when Tegoshi pulled away, breaking their kiss. He just stared at Masuda, eyes wide and still a bit teary. “Taka…why?”
Masuda giggled nervously and pointed at the door. “We should go inside, we’re both totally soaked.”
Tegoshi nodded, and tried to unlock the door with shaky hands. Masuda took the key from his hands and unlocked the door by himself, opening it and smiling towards Tegoshi. When Tegoshi had walked inside, Masuda followed, closing the door behind them. Tegoshi looked really uncomfortable, fiddling with the sleeves of his damp uniform, gaze resting on the floor. Masuda squeezed his shoulder lightly. “Yuya, is something wrong?”
Tegoshi turned his head, his teary eyes meeting Masuda’s. “Taka…I…”
His shaky voice made Masuda’s heart ache. Tegoshi suddenly looked more vulnerable than ever before for some reason, and Masuda hated to see him like that. “I’m sorry for suddenly kissing you like that…”
Tegoshi gazed at him, shaking his head. Masuda turned around, cheeks becoming hotter than he had wanted them to. He started to dig through a drawer to find some dry clothes for them, just wanting to do something in order to not let the awkwardness in the room stifle him. When two small arms wrapped around his waist from behind, he felt how his heart skipped a couple of beats.
“Taka, I…I love you.” There wasn’t any confidence in Tegoshi’s voice, it was like he didn’t believe in his feelings at all, or didn’t believe that they would ever get answered. “Does Takahisa love me too?”
Masuda smiled and turned around to meet Tegoshi’s worried eyes. “I do.”
Tegoshi looked relieved, and smiled slightly. “Will you say it?”
Masuda leaned their foreheads together and grabbed Tegoshi’s hand. “I love you.”
“Say it again.”
“I love you.”
Masuda could hear Tegoshi sob softly and squeezed his hand. “Aren’t you happy?”
Tegoshi shook his head. “Of course I’m happy…But at the same time I’m so scared…”
Masuda wasn’t late to wrap his arms around the boy and holding him close. “There’s nothing to be scared of.”
Tegoshi leaned his cheek in Masuda’s shoulder. “Don’t take it the wrong way. I’m so happy that you love me, but I’m just as scared that you will hurt me or leave me all alone. Everything people have done to me is to hurt me; I don’t know how to love at all.”
Masuda kissed his temple and caressed his back. “I won’t leave you, that are for sure.”
“How can I trust such words? Humans aren’t to be trusted, they always betray each other.”
Masuda didn’t know what to answer. “That’s indeed true.” He pulled back a bit, enough to be able to meet Tegoshi’s gaze. “But there are people you can trust. I want you to be able to trust me. It may take time, but I will show you that you’ll be able to trust me.”
Tegoshi wiped away some tears from his cheek and smiled slightly. “Takahisa is the only person in the world whom I trust, even if it’s just a little bit.”
Masuda patted his head. “That’s good.”
“Hey, Taka.”
“What?”
“I’m freezing.”
Masuda laughed lightly. “Yeah, right, we should change clothes.”
Tegoshi looked down, cheeks taking a shade of pink. “Will you stay here with me tonight?”
Masuda looked at him for a moment before smiling. “If that’s what you want.”
Tegoshi smiled widely and placed a kiss on Masuda’s cheek. “I love you.”
Masuda giggled. “I didn’t think that you would be this…clingy. And romantic”
Tegoshi backed away and pouted. “I just never got the chance to be.”
Masuda embraced him warmly again. “It’s a good thing.”
Tegoshi just silently wrapped his arms around Masuda’s waist and buried his face in his shoulder. “Taka won’t leave me, right?”
“I won’t.”
“Even when you get to know about the terrible things I’ve done?”
“I don’t know that before you tell me”
Tegoshi tightened his grip. “I don’t want Taka to leave me.”
Masuda patted the back of his head lightly. “I won’t leave you. I love you; nothing will change that fact, ever.”
Tegoshi giggled softly, it made Masuda’s heart beat faster. “Taka loves me.”
Masuda smiled. “Taka loves you.”
****
There was something relaxing about all this, lying beside Masuda, just watching him sleep and listen to his steady breaths. Tegoshi could have spent the entire day like that, just be close to the person he loved and not think about the rotten world outside. He didn’t want to live like a delinquent anymore, Masuda would be sad if he did. Maybe he had found a reason now, a reason to take his life in his own hands and stop doing stupid things. Yes, Masuda was reason enough, that was for sure, now he just needed the courage. To leave a delinquent group wouldn’t go painlessly and smooth, rather on the contrary. But it had to be done, if he wanted to take a hold of his life now when he had the reason to. It was best no not tell Masuda too many details, he would just get worried anyway. Tegoshi moved closer to Masuda and snuggled an arm around his waist, burying his face in the crook of his neck. He could feel the boy shift position and groan quietly when he fell out of his sweet slumber. Tegoshi smiled. “Good morning, Taka.”
Masuda yawned. “Good morning. Slept well?”
Tegoshi nodded. “The company made it a lot more enjoyable.”
Masuda giggled softly and kissed Tegoshi’s hair. “I can’t disagree.”
Tegoshi was quiet for a moment before kissing Masuda’s collarbone softly. “Hey, Taka…I…I want to be serious about you.”
Masuda laughed quietly. “What do you mean?”
Tegoshi bit his lip. “I really, really love you. I want to be a good boyfriend for Takahisa, so I’ve decided one thing.”
Masuda nodded. “What thing?”
“I’ve decided that I will stop being a delinquent. I want to leave that group I’m a part of and start living a real life.”
Masuda sat up, looking Tegoshi in the eye. “Seriously?”
Tegoshi nodded. “I have a reason now, it wasn’t worth it when I was alone, but now I have you. I want to be worthy of you.”
Masuda was just staring at him, a touch of sadness in his eyes. “What’s wrong, Taka?”
Masuda tried to smile, but Tegoshi noticed that it was just pressed and unnatural. “Boyfriend, you say…” Tegoshi nodded slightly, his heart aching slightly when seeing Masuda’s expression, troubled and sad.
“I wonder if it’s possible for us to be like that…”
Tegoshi bit his lip, trying to hold back the tears that were dangerously close to escape from the corners of his eyes. Masuda noticed it, and laughed nervously. “I don’t mean that I don’t want to! It’s just…I don’t know.”
Tegoshi sat up and shook his head slightly, trying to steady his voice enough to speak. “It’s okay, I get it. I’m not the kind of person you want to show off to your friends and family, am I right?”
Masuda seemed to hesitate, but nodded shortly. It broke Tegoshi’s heart, but he managed to force a laugh. “Well, that’s obvious, isn’t it? I mean, it’s me after all. I wouldn’t want to bring someone like me home to meet my family.”
Masuda grabbed Tegoshi’s hand and squeezed it lightly. “Yuya…”
Tegoshi managed to force a smile, but it surely didn’t turn out to be convincing. “Its okay, Taka, don’t worry. If you want to, we could still see each other like this, right? Just like we have done up until now, just seeing each other kind of secretly.”
Masuda looked down, but nodded after a while. “I’m sorry, Yuya. I really am.”
Tegoshi shook his head. “Its fine, I told you. I’m happy just to have you loving me; it’s more than I’ve ever wished for.” I was only half true, though, but what else could he say? It just had to be like this. He couldn’t expect more, at least not at the moment.
Happy laughs. Kids running around, playing with each other. Couples in love that enjoyed the warm and sunny weather. Tegoshi watched them all, sitting on a bench in the park that law nearby his home. He should be happy, he knew that very well, but he just couldn’t. Masuda’s feelings for him should be enough, but somehow it hurt like hell to know that Masuda probably didn’t love him enough to show it to the world. It was quite obvious that he didn’t want to, and Tegoshi understood why, but it didn’t hurt any less because of that. But then again, he just had to become a person Masuda could be proud of, a person Masuda wouldn’t be ashamed to show off to people. Maybe it was impossible, but he had to try. Tegoshi sighed before rising, walking away slowly, his head still filled with thoughts of the depressing kind. He walked past the convenience store and wondered if he should stop by and buy something for dinner. When he was about to enter the store, someone called his name. Tegoshi turned his head and saw a gang of guys, and he knew them all too well.
“Hey, Tegoshi. Wanna hang out a bit?”
Now or never, this was it. “No thanks. I want to quit.”
The tallest guy, Suzuki, the leader of the gang stared at him. “Pardon?”
Tegoshi looked back with a fierce look in his eyes. “I want to quit. I have better things to do than just beating people up without a reason.”
He got only a laugh in response. “I forgot that you’ve become a good boy lately, even saving some fatso from Okamoto.”
Tegoshi gritted his teeth. “He’s not fat.”
Suzuki laughed loudly. “Oh, Tegoshi, don’t tell me he turns you on.”
Tegoshi just stared angrily, trying to keep himself under control. The guy laughed. “I’ve always thought that you had that kind of look, but I didn’t think that you actually were a fag.” He moved closer to Tegoshi, smirking. “Tell me, does it feel good to have his cock showed up your ass?”
Tegoshi gritted his teeth, but didn’t move his gaze an inch. “Try it by yourself and you’ll get to know, bastard. And for your information, I haven’t even slept with him.”
The other guy’s expression wasn’t pleased, and Tegoshi smiled slightly. “Anyway, I don’t want to be a part of this rotten gathering of people anymore.”
“You think you can walk away just like that?”
Tegoshi stared the guy in the eyes. “Who are you to stop me?”
Suzuki laughed condescendingly. “You shouldn’t underestimate you enemy, Tegoshi.”
Tegoshi was just going to spit a poisonous comment in his face, but before he was able to, he felt a sudden pain in the back of his head. He stumbled forward a bit before falling, his vision turning black when he hit the ground.
*~*~*~*~*~*
This was supposed to be done earlier, but I just didn’t have the motivation. I'll do my best to update more often when I get my summer-break in less than two weeks ^.^
Thanks for reading ^.^<3333