My thoughts
It seems like the days are just flying by now. Lasting memories are still being made, but at this moment in time they mean more than they ever have before. It's never going to be the same as it is now. We're never going to be the 206 cypress girls again besides in pictures or in our dreams. And maybe once in awhile we can all get together and it will feel like old times. I have to remember though that this is a part of growing up. Something I've learned is that instead of things getting easier they usually get harder. It's gotten harder to keep in touch with old friends and it's harder to let go than it's ever been before. When I left high school I thought that I would really miss it and desire to be back there with my friends, but what I'm come to know here has greatly out powered that. Those people were just friends, but most of the people that surround me here are family.
When I was taking into consideration how much time I would have to actually work on something special for each of my suitemates, I decided that it would be best to do something a little different for each of them. I want you to know that each of you has had a tremendous effect on who I am as a person. You guys have taught me so much. The lessons I've learned this year will continue to stay with me for the rest of my life and when I look back on what I accomplished this year I will know that everything I went through was only to get me to a better place. There's a quote that really comes to my mind when thinking about you guys: "I always knew that the tears would make us laugh, but I never knew that the laughs would make me cry." When I look back on all the times we've spent together I remember the laughs that we shared more than everything, because that's really what matters. Anything it took to get us to this point is beyond my present knowledge, any harsh words between any of us no longer exist, and we are just forever friends who will share each others laughs and crys.
Other than that I've really been thinking about a lot of things. Everybody always says that things happen how they do for certain reasons. Something the pastor said this morning really touched me. He talked about trusting god. I don't trust god enough. Too many times I have tried to get through stuff on my own. I don't need to worry about stuff as much. God is watching over me and protecting me. Whenever I worry about things I'm just making it harder on myself. I remember how I used to be a lot closer with god, but when I'm here I sometimes seem to drift. I've never had to have anybody push me. Whenever I'm in church though god really speaks to me and he speaks to me through his word.
I only have three exams left and a paper that has to be submitted electronically for English. In order to do well on any of these I need to relax. It doesn't matter how much I actually get done if I can never relax. My classical Medieval periods exam is going to be rather difficult. I really need to study hard for this one. The thing is though that I can't focus as much as I used to. I'm too pensive and I have too much going on in my mind. I need to find a way to concentrate better.
My music doens't help too much. It just makes me think more. It's this room. This room is filled with so much emotion and joy. Looking on my walls and around the room I can see so much that shows the type of person I am. The chain on my wall is one of the best examples. My bible quotes, my frogs, and my books all tell me that this is home. This is where I'm supposed to be. In my room. I don't want to leave this room. Looking back on how hard it was to get adjusted to being here I know that it's going to be just as hard to adjust back home. It will actually be nice being at home, but I think I'll actually miss having all these people around all the time. I can't walk outside anymore without seeing one person that I know. It's going to be incredibly different once I point to this building and say "that's where I used to live."
*** I have to get some stuff done now though. I feel like I could write forever. There is so much that I have to say, but words really can't describe everything I'm feeling. Words aren't enough. I find it hard to say what I mean anymore. I'm just so pensive and I have so much going on in my mind at one time. I'm glad I feel like I have most stuff figured out now. And I know that even though I'm going to miss this place I'll be fine where ever I go.
When I was taking into consideration how much time I would have to actually work on something special for each of my suitemates, I decided that it would be best to do something a little different for each of them. I want you to know that each of you has had a tremendous effect on who I am as a person. You guys have taught me so much. The lessons I've learned this year will continue to stay with me for the rest of my life and when I look back on what I accomplished this year I will know that everything I went through was only to get me to a better place. There's a quote that really comes to my mind when thinking about you guys: "I always knew that the tears would make us laugh, but I never knew that the laughs would make me cry." When I look back on all the times we've spent together I remember the laughs that we shared more than everything, because that's really what matters. Anything it took to get us to this point is beyond my present knowledge, any harsh words between any of us no longer exist, and we are just forever friends who will share each others laughs and crys.
Other than that I've really been thinking about a lot of things. Everybody always says that things happen how they do for certain reasons. Something the pastor said this morning really touched me. He talked about trusting god. I don't trust god enough. Too many times I have tried to get through stuff on my own. I don't need to worry about stuff as much. God is watching over me and protecting me. Whenever I worry about things I'm just making it harder on myself. I remember how I used to be a lot closer with god, but when I'm here I sometimes seem to drift. I've never had to have anybody push me. Whenever I'm in church though god really speaks to me and he speaks to me through his word.
I only have three exams left and a paper that has to be submitted electronically for English. In order to do well on any of these I need to relax. It doesn't matter how much I actually get done if I can never relax. My classical Medieval periods exam is going to be rather difficult. I really need to study hard for this one. The thing is though that I can't focus as much as I used to. I'm too pensive and I have too much going on in my mind. I need to find a way to concentrate better.
My music doens't help too much. It just makes me think more. It's this room. This room is filled with so much emotion and joy. Looking on my walls and around the room I can see so much that shows the type of person I am. The chain on my wall is one of the best examples. My bible quotes, my frogs, and my books all tell me that this is home. This is where I'm supposed to be. In my room. I don't want to leave this room. Looking back on how hard it was to get adjusted to being here I know that it's going to be just as hard to adjust back home. It will actually be nice being at home, but I think I'll actually miss having all these people around all the time. I can't walk outside anymore without seeing one person that I know. It's going to be incredibly different once I point to this building and say "that's where I used to live."
*** I have to get some stuff done now though. I feel like I could write forever. There is so much that I have to say, but words really can't describe everything I'm feeling. Words aren't enough. I find it hard to say what I mean anymore. I'm just so pensive and I have so much going on in my mind at one time. I'm glad I feel like I have most stuff figured out now. And I know that even though I'm going to miss this place I'll be fine where ever I go.