(no subject)
I had no idea I was so naive. It seems that nothing is sacred to people my age. And no one has any sort of self-discipline, or even just plain foresight. No one seems to realize just how pointless they make things (that should be special) by how they treat it.
Again, this must be one of those instances where my opinion and point of view is just wrong (at least for all practical purposes) because I am so badly outnumbered in my point of view on these subjects that I must be insane. Or something.
The funny thing is, I'm not even angry at mankind. I am completely, 100% apathetic. I'm not sure what's worse: not giving one iota of a care, not being angry or righteous or indignant, or not wondering if maybe I should change my world-view and just give in to the temptation to be like everyone else. Of course, for that latter one, I'd need to find the temptation first. Because, it is just so. Extraordinarily. Stupid.
But, in the end, to each his own. I just hope to find someone who holds the same things sacred as I do. And who finds those commonly acceptable actions just as stupid, pointless, and wrong as I do. Then again, I do know people like that. Just not here.
I had no idea just how founded my misanthropic tendencies are until this year. I mean, I had always sort of suspected, but I never had the inclination to see just how valid my assuption was.
But I only have one and a half more years here. Then I can go back home to the people I truly love and whom I would do anything for. People who melt this bitter persona I've adopted here and who make me so geniunely happy.
Okay. Enough melodrama.
Rugby's been great. I love just getting out and running. I have this feeling that I was made for full-contact sports. Also, I've been propping lately, even though I think I might be a bit too tall for that position. Despite my initial hesitance over the position (which was made moot by our lack of props for the game) I think that that's where I really need to be. My sheer size and strength (especially relative to our team, which is the smallest of all of the other college women's teams that I've seen so far) make me ideal for the position. I just wish that I was a bit more experienced. I make some really dumb mistakes. I've also noticed that, in games, when I'm about to tackle someone from the other team who has the ball, getting the ball from them never even crosses my mind. The only thing that I attempt to do is tackle them as hard as I can, probably due to my judo-upbringing. I never played a sport before this that had silly concerns such as ball play. I should probably work on my priorities...
Also, I got some of my schedule worked out. None of the biology or chemistry classes really interested me (except for grad level ones, which I could take, but I wouldn't get any undergrad credit for them without a load of paperwork, consent of the professor, consent of my advisor, consent of the honor's college, and who knows what else. It just isn't worth it at the moment) except for the second semester of biochemistry. However, I got my transcript from Oregon reviewed by the assitant Dean and was happy to find that I didn't screw myself over by studying at a different university for a year.
Now I just need to gather up the nerve to sign up with my biology advisor. It's kinda funny because, I had the same advisor for 2 years (we didn't get one freshman year: they just lumped us all together for group-advising) and was about to go to his office to sign up for an advising appointment. I decided, one a whim, to check my transcript to see if he was still my advisor, which was purely for reassurance since they don't generally change your advisor. Also, he was an assistant professor from whom I would most likely never take a class. Also, I think he had a focus in ecology, or some other branch that I have zero interest in. Anyway, I checked my transcript only to find that my advisor had changed! My new advisor is my biochemistry professor!
I have no idea what to think. I'm almost certain that advisors don't change randomly, which means that he must have wanted to have me as an advisee (after all, he can do that, seeing as he's in charge of undergraduate studies or whatever). Or something like that. I might have to ask him about it once I go in to talk to him...