3 mocks.
1. Last summer I worked at a beach-side amusement park as a ticket cashier... basically, I sold tourists tickets to the rides while they bitched about the prices. Many thrifty guests would bring in coupons, but almost never read the fine print. That's understandable, but once the fine-print is explained to you clearly and concisely, and you still don't get it?
Customer: Yeah, I want four all-day wristbands
Me: Okay, that'll be 107.80.
Customer: Oh, wait, no, I have this coupon *thrusts coupon from KFC, covered in chicken grease, in my face*
Me: Actually, this coupon is only for our Plus package, it costs 8 dollars more than the regular wristbands.
Customer: But I don't the plus, I want the coupon off the wristbands.
Me: That coupon's only good for the plus package. But the good thing about this coupon is that it takes 8 dollars off the price of the plus package, so you'll be spending the same amount as you would on the wristbands, but you'll also get vouchers to two of our attractions.
Customer: No, no, no, I don't want the plus, I want the regular.
Me: I understand, but you're going to be pay the same amount but get more. It's really more logi-
Customer: I know what you're doing, you're trying to get me to spend even more money! Just give me the regular wristbands!
Me: You don't want two attraction vouchers free-of-charge?
Customer: Not if I have to pay for the plus package, no!
Me: But... Okay.
2. On the last day of school in seventh grade, my sciene teacher let us ask her questions about whatever, so long as it was remotely related to human biology (what we'd been studying that trimester). My mom had recently gotten a brace for her wrist because of her tendonitis, and I had been feeling pain in my wrist. So I asked:
Me: Is tendonitis hereditary?
Girl in Class: What's tendonitis?
Me: It's when the tendons that connect your bones to your muscles get inflammed.
GIC: Yeah, I think it is contagious *scoots away from me*
3. At a local beach, there's this wide, shallow area of semi-stagnant water where a river feeds into the ocean. There's a sign reading "Not suitable for swimming. Contains high levels of bacteria. Contact can result in bacterial infection, growth disorders, and in the case of some women, future birth defects." The sign is placed in such a way that in order to read it, you have to wade a good 50 feet into the toxic water.
Customer: Yeah, I want four all-day wristbands
Me: Okay, that'll be 107.80.
Customer: Oh, wait, no, I have this coupon *thrusts coupon from KFC, covered in chicken grease, in my face*
Me: Actually, this coupon is only for our Plus package, it costs 8 dollars more than the regular wristbands.
Customer: But I don't the plus, I want the coupon off the wristbands.
Me: That coupon's only good for the plus package. But the good thing about this coupon is that it takes 8 dollars off the price of the plus package, so you'll be spending the same amount as you would on the wristbands, but you'll also get vouchers to two of our attractions.
Customer: No, no, no, I don't want the plus, I want the regular.
Me: I understand, but you're going to be pay the same amount but get more. It's really more logi-
Customer: I know what you're doing, you're trying to get me to spend even more money! Just give me the regular wristbands!
Me: You don't want two attraction vouchers free-of-charge?
Customer: Not if I have to pay for the plus package, no!
Me: But... Okay.
2. On the last day of school in seventh grade, my sciene teacher let us ask her questions about whatever, so long as it was remotely related to human biology (what we'd been studying that trimester). My mom had recently gotten a brace for her wrist because of her tendonitis, and I had been feeling pain in my wrist. So I asked:
Me: Is tendonitis hereditary?
Girl in Class: What's tendonitis?
Me: It's when the tendons that connect your bones to your muscles get inflammed.
GIC: Yeah, I think it is contagious *scoots away from me*
3. At a local beach, there's this wide, shallow area of semi-stagnant water where a river feeds into the ocean. There's a sign reading "Not suitable for swimming. Contains high levels of bacteria. Contact can result in bacterial infection, growth disorders, and in the case of some women, future birth defects." The sign is placed in such a way that in order to read it, you have to wade a good 50 feet into the toxic water.