"Definitions"
I've seen some very compelling, interesting analyses of episodes of HIMYM, of ideas and themes that are emerging, and some very thorough picspams that prove that a picture really is worth a thousand words.
I don't do pictures. I do words. I turn on subtitles when I'm watching TV and movies in English, even on episodes and movies I've watched dozens of times. I love language. What it looks like, how it flows, what it's revealing, and what it chooses to hide. I found the season premiere of HIMYM to be very tightly written and linguistically fascinating. This is far from a comprehensive analysis, but just some thoughts I had, connections I made.
Totally Unnecessary Disclaimer: I am an avid Barney/Robin 'shipper.
"Even better, I'm seeing him naked."- Robin
The other characters don't know it, but both Robin and Barney both know that she's referring to him, and it's a subtle way (consciously on her part or not) of establishing that this relationship is predominantly a physical one, at this point.
The bizarre protestations they both put up in the apartment when Lily refers to them as boyfriend and girlfriend
For two characters who are generally quite smooth and in control, this is a rather interesting display of out-of-character awkwardness. When Marshall called Robin a slut last season, she raised only minimal protestations, but here she babbles on. Of the two, in this instance, Barney's protestations feel more forced, as if part of him is only protesting because that is what is expected of him in this situation.
"Things with me and Robin are as good as they could possibly be."- Barney
Are they, really? Or is he settling for what she's willing to give him at this point? From the beginning, Barney has been more invested in this relationship, and this insistence that things are a good as they could "possibly be" feels to me like he's telling himself that, when what he really means is "this is what she's willing to give me, and I'm going to be happy with it."
Robin's expressive look at Barney when Brad asks her if she has a boyfriend.
This is one loud silence. She looks to him for only a second, but in that moment, she's giving him the chance to say something, anything. But he doesn't- can't, perhaps. And because he doesn't say anything, she denies having a boyfriend. What if he had said something - anything- here?
"I just thought of a reason"- Lily
Lily has done some questionable things in the past, but I don't think I've ever disliked her as much as I did in this moment. Barney is clearly trying to hide how devastated he is, and she takes on a tone of smug mocking that is cruel and unnecessary. The same line could have been said gently, with a comforting tone, but instead she just comes across as a heartless puppetmaster who wants to make sure her puppet understands his place in all this. And this line sets the tone for her actions for the rest of the episode. She seems to operate under the notion that she's doing it for their benefit, but her cruelty towards him here tells me that she does this for herself.
"My heart says 'leap into it'; my brain says it's a bad idea"-Robin
Near perfect repetition of what she said to Barney in The Leap. This calls to mind two things- people who are lying about something have the tendency to create one specific lie and repeat it by rote, in order to mask the truth. Or, this is something she really is struggling with, which is why she says essentially the exact same thing twice. If it is the second case, then what that tells me is that she is still exactly where she was in May, still not sure, still doubting, still afraid to risk anything. That after a summer of "hanging out" and "seeing where it goes"- she hasn't given the relationship any more thought than she had before that scene in the hospital. Makes me wonder how invested she is, if after four months of whatever it is, her brain still thinks it's a bad idea. And clearly, she hasn't 'leapt into it' yet- she hasn't given herself over to the emotional side of the relationship, she's holding back.
"Robin is already his girlfriend"- Ted
I kinda love Ted here. He's perceptive enough that he sees what's happening between Barney and Robin, and all he does is call it as he sees it, and lets Barney do what he will with that information. He makes no attempt to manipulate the situation.
"Same rules as for Gremlins..."-Barney
He is so unbelievably emotionally stunted. However, these rules clearly mean something to him, and we've heard him mention some of them previously, and yet it completely slips his attention that he has done these things with Robin, until Ted points it out. These rules that are usually such a part of his MO go out the window with Robin, and he doesn't even seem to have noticed.
"Is she my girlfriend?"- Barney
Massive amounts of doubt here. In this one question, there's a myriad of related questions "Do I want her to be my girlfriend?" "Does she want to be my girlfriend?" "If she is my girlfriend, what does that change?" etc...
Second round of extremely awkward, unsmooth protestations.
Interesting that this time I perceive a slight change in that in this case, her protestations feel more false, more pro forma than his do. Perhaps something Brad said made her start to think, and that scared her a little.
"We've been over this...unless I say 'flugelhorn', you haven't gone too far."- Robin.
FASCINATING. The fact that she has to remind him that she will say 'flugelhorn' if he goes too far tells me that they haven't had much cause to use the safe word during sex. And, yet, twice within the second half of the episode they use it as an emotional safe word- when she asks if he locked them in, and again when she tries to call him "sweetie pie"- when they feel that the situation has gone too far. These two are the only couple I can think of that would need an emotional safe word.
(This seems like a good place to note that throughout this scene, Barney's voice sounds more uncertain, more open, more vulnerable than I can ever recall him sounding. He feels safe enough around her to let his guard down, and yet he still has serious doubts and insecurities.)
"We're not having the talk."- Barney.
Directed at Lily on the other side of the door. It sounds as if he has lost control of his voice modulation in his frustration. His tone of voice is always very deliberate, very much under his control, but here he's lost that control, and his voice takes on a slightly elevated pitch, and his emotions colour his words.
"We're just hanging out."
Admitting nothing, giving them both plenty of wiggle room to back down if it gets too emotionally risky.
"Seeing where things are going."
Admitting even less. This one is passive, and they relinquish all responsibility for, and ownership of, the relationship.
"Barnman and Robin."
The superhero/sidekick classification is one of fantasy, and not reality. And because it's not real, there can't be any limits of expectations of it.
"'Where do you see this relationship going?' Oh, my God, that sounds so cheesy. But, um, where do you see this relationship going?"- Robin
When they get right down to it, she does want to have to the talk. She just doesn't know how to do with without exposing herself to risk. Lily gives them this emotionally safe space to have the conversation- anything they say here can be denied later under claims of duress, because they didn't want to talk about it, but Lily forced them.
"I don't know."- Barney
Heart-breakingly vulnerable admission, and probably the last thing in the world he wants to admit to. Barney always knows where things are going, because he's always in control. But in this, he's lost that. This uncertainty is notably different from his discussion with Lily in "Do I Know You?" when he was very clear on what he wanted from Robin- to be with her all the time, to hear about her day, and tell her about his, etc. And it's also very different from "Benefits" when he told her he loved her. It's different now, because it's real, the relationship (whatever the heck it is) between them is a tangible and acknowledged thing.
"Maybe we should go back to being friends."-Barney
After we've seen him pining for her for a year, he finally gets her, and yet *he* is the first one to suggest they transition back to friends. His emotional insecurity forces him to be the first one to say it, because if she did, it would devastate him. But she is very quick to match him "maybe" for "maybe"- neither of them is willing to take a definitive stand anywhere. The remainder of their interaction in the episode feels a lot like a game of poker, where they match each other, and then raise the stakes a little higher every time.
Confession Through The Door:
"We sat down"- this is true -
"and we had the talk"- well, they tried, but found a very "them" solution to the whole thing-
"Barney's my boyfriend"- this is the lie they agreed to tell-
"And Robin's my girlfriend"- ditto-
"I know it sounds nuts, but it feels good to say"- he's the first one to move beyond the basic lie they agreed on,
elaborating on it, and hedging into emotional territory-
"We're both afraid of commitment"- TRUE-
"But the fact is we can't live without each other"- hello! There are about a thousand things she could have said that would have been less emotional, less definite, but she chose this, and I find that very telling-
"And if the alternative is not being together, then it's worth taking this risk"- her raises her here, and a little more truth is seeping into their so-called lies. And then comes the turn-
"Cause she's awesome"- it's in his body language, his tone, his hesitancy; he means this, a lot-
"He's awesome"- and she matches him, in words and tone-
"He looks nice in a suit"- true, and not too emotionally scary to say, this feels safe, but it means more because they're not just playing to the cheapseats now- they're saying it to each other, under the guise that they're still talking to Lily-
"She can handle her Scotch"- he matches her again-
"He's my boyfriend"- they've already told Lily what she wanted to hear, there was no reason to repeat it for her sake, they've already convinced her; this is for them, and there's a satisfied pride in her smile and her voice when she says it-
"And she's my girlfriend"- and again he matches her-
Outside the Apartment:
"She bought it"- she was this first one to repeat the "lie" and she's also the first to draw back the curtain, as if to say "Remember that wasn't real, right?"
"Hook, line and sinker. We're good"- he matches her tone, yet again-
"Totally. So, you wanna get breakfast?"- sure, maybe she's just hungry...but, wait a second, isn't there fresh pancakes and bacon back in the apartment? That is why they finally had the "talk", after all. So it's clearly not just a matter of finding food- she wants to spend more time with him, one-on-one, even though they have been alone in her room for HOURS. The idea of going out for breakfast is also a highly visible, public declaration of some kind of relationship- and then he ups her by suggesting "brunch"- which has long been established as a purely couples' thing on this show.
She tries to up him by calling him "Sweetie pie"- to which he backs down, calling "Flugelhorn"- and she immediately agrees and backs down as well. And they walk away chuckling.
Epilogue:
"They don't realize they weren't lying."-Lily
I think she's half right. I think Barney knows he isn't lying, and Robin knows that she isn't lying, but I think they're still doubting what the other said, which is why they were so quick to gloat over pulling the wool over Lily's eyes, because that's safe, that's their "out" if it gets too emotional at this point.
After many, many viewings to analyze every word, pause, and hesitation, I find myself again marveling at how fantastic Cobie and Neil are together. They match each other, note for note, the entire time, and that is impressive. I've noticed that it's one-on-one scenes with Neil that can highlight the other actors' weaknesses, but Cobie can go toe-to-toe with him and completely hold her own. And I think that's part of what gives them such incredible chemistry, and makes the relationship between the characters so believable.
I don't do pictures. I do words. I turn on subtitles when I'm watching TV and movies in English, even on episodes and movies I've watched dozens of times. I love language. What it looks like, how it flows, what it's revealing, and what it chooses to hide. I found the season premiere of HIMYM to be very tightly written and linguistically fascinating. This is far from a comprehensive analysis, but just some thoughts I had, connections I made.
Totally Unnecessary Disclaimer: I am an avid Barney/Robin 'shipper.
"Even better, I'm seeing him naked."- Robin
The other characters don't know it, but both Robin and Barney both know that she's referring to him, and it's a subtle way (consciously on her part or not) of establishing that this relationship is predominantly a physical one, at this point.
The bizarre protestations they both put up in the apartment when Lily refers to them as boyfriend and girlfriend
For two characters who are generally quite smooth and in control, this is a rather interesting display of out-of-character awkwardness. When Marshall called Robin a slut last season, she raised only minimal protestations, but here she babbles on. Of the two, in this instance, Barney's protestations feel more forced, as if part of him is only protesting because that is what is expected of him in this situation.
"Things with me and Robin are as good as they could possibly be."- Barney
Are they, really? Or is he settling for what she's willing to give him at this point? From the beginning, Barney has been more invested in this relationship, and this insistence that things are a good as they could "possibly be" feels to me like he's telling himself that, when what he really means is "this is what she's willing to give me, and I'm going to be happy with it."
Robin's expressive look at Barney when Brad asks her if she has a boyfriend.
This is one loud silence. She looks to him for only a second, but in that moment, she's giving him the chance to say something, anything. But he doesn't- can't, perhaps. And because he doesn't say anything, she denies having a boyfriend. What if he had said something - anything- here?
"I just thought of a reason"- Lily
Lily has done some questionable things in the past, but I don't think I've ever disliked her as much as I did in this moment. Barney is clearly trying to hide how devastated he is, and she takes on a tone of smug mocking that is cruel and unnecessary. The same line could have been said gently, with a comforting tone, but instead she just comes across as a heartless puppetmaster who wants to make sure her puppet understands his place in all this. And this line sets the tone for her actions for the rest of the episode. She seems to operate under the notion that she's doing it for their benefit, but her cruelty towards him here tells me that she does this for herself.
"My heart says 'leap into it'; my brain says it's a bad idea"-Robin
Near perfect repetition of what she said to Barney in The Leap. This calls to mind two things- people who are lying about something have the tendency to create one specific lie and repeat it by rote, in order to mask the truth. Or, this is something she really is struggling with, which is why she says essentially the exact same thing twice. If it is the second case, then what that tells me is that she is still exactly where she was in May, still not sure, still doubting, still afraid to risk anything. That after a summer of "hanging out" and "seeing where it goes"- she hasn't given the relationship any more thought than she had before that scene in the hospital. Makes me wonder how invested she is, if after four months of whatever it is, her brain still thinks it's a bad idea. And clearly, she hasn't 'leapt into it' yet- she hasn't given herself over to the emotional side of the relationship, she's holding back.
"Robin is already his girlfriend"- Ted
I kinda love Ted here. He's perceptive enough that he sees what's happening between Barney and Robin, and all he does is call it as he sees it, and lets Barney do what he will with that information. He makes no attempt to manipulate the situation.
"Same rules as for Gremlins..."-Barney
He is so unbelievably emotionally stunted. However, these rules clearly mean something to him, and we've heard him mention some of them previously, and yet it completely slips his attention that he has done these things with Robin, until Ted points it out. These rules that are usually such a part of his MO go out the window with Robin, and he doesn't even seem to have noticed.
"Is she my girlfriend?"- Barney
Massive amounts of doubt here. In this one question, there's a myriad of related questions "Do I want her to be my girlfriend?" "Does she want to be my girlfriend?" "If she is my girlfriend, what does that change?" etc...
Second round of extremely awkward, unsmooth protestations.
Interesting that this time I perceive a slight change in that in this case, her protestations feel more false, more pro forma than his do. Perhaps something Brad said made her start to think, and that scared her a little.
"We've been over this...unless I say 'flugelhorn', you haven't gone too far."- Robin.
FASCINATING. The fact that she has to remind him that she will say 'flugelhorn' if he goes too far tells me that they haven't had much cause to use the safe word during sex. And, yet, twice within the second half of the episode they use it as an emotional safe word- when she asks if he locked them in, and again when she tries to call him "sweetie pie"- when they feel that the situation has gone too far. These two are the only couple I can think of that would need an emotional safe word.
(This seems like a good place to note that throughout this scene, Barney's voice sounds more uncertain, more open, more vulnerable than I can ever recall him sounding. He feels safe enough around her to let his guard down, and yet he still has serious doubts and insecurities.)
"We're not having the talk."- Barney.
Directed at Lily on the other side of the door. It sounds as if he has lost control of his voice modulation in his frustration. His tone of voice is always very deliberate, very much under his control, but here he's lost that control, and his voice takes on a slightly elevated pitch, and his emotions colour his words.
"We're just hanging out."
Admitting nothing, giving them both plenty of wiggle room to back down if it gets too emotionally risky.
"Seeing where things are going."
Admitting even less. This one is passive, and they relinquish all responsibility for, and ownership of, the relationship.
"Barnman and Robin."
The superhero/sidekick classification is one of fantasy, and not reality. And because it's not real, there can't be any limits of expectations of it.
"'Where do you see this relationship going?' Oh, my God, that sounds so cheesy. But, um, where do you see this relationship going?"- Robin
When they get right down to it, she does want to have to the talk. She just doesn't know how to do with without exposing herself to risk. Lily gives them this emotionally safe space to have the conversation- anything they say here can be denied later under claims of duress, because they didn't want to talk about it, but Lily forced them.
"I don't know."- Barney
Heart-breakingly vulnerable admission, and probably the last thing in the world he wants to admit to. Barney always knows where things are going, because he's always in control. But in this, he's lost that. This uncertainty is notably different from his discussion with Lily in "Do I Know You?" when he was very clear on what he wanted from Robin- to be with her all the time, to hear about her day, and tell her about his, etc. And it's also very different from "Benefits" when he told her he loved her. It's different now, because it's real, the relationship (whatever the heck it is) between them is a tangible and acknowledged thing.
"Maybe we should go back to being friends."-Barney
After we've seen him pining for her for a year, he finally gets her, and yet *he* is the first one to suggest they transition back to friends. His emotional insecurity forces him to be the first one to say it, because if she did, it would devastate him. But she is very quick to match him "maybe" for "maybe"- neither of them is willing to take a definitive stand anywhere. The remainder of their interaction in the episode feels a lot like a game of poker, where they match each other, and then raise the stakes a little higher every time.
Confession Through The Door:
"We sat down"- this is true -
"and we had the talk"- well, they tried, but found a very "them" solution to the whole thing-
"Barney's my boyfriend"- this is the lie they agreed to tell-
"And Robin's my girlfriend"- ditto-
"I know it sounds nuts, but it feels good to say"- he's the first one to move beyond the basic lie they agreed on,
elaborating on it, and hedging into emotional territory-
"We're both afraid of commitment"- TRUE-
"But the fact is we can't live without each other"- hello! There are about a thousand things she could have said that would have been less emotional, less definite, but she chose this, and I find that very telling-
"And if the alternative is not being together, then it's worth taking this risk"- her raises her here, and a little more truth is seeping into their so-called lies. And then comes the turn-
"Cause she's awesome"- it's in his body language, his tone, his hesitancy; he means this, a lot-
"He's awesome"- and she matches him, in words and tone-
"He looks nice in a suit"- true, and not too emotionally scary to say, this feels safe, but it means more because they're not just playing to the cheapseats now- they're saying it to each other, under the guise that they're still talking to Lily-
"She can handle her Scotch"- he matches her again-
"He's my boyfriend"- they've already told Lily what she wanted to hear, there was no reason to repeat it for her sake, they've already convinced her; this is for them, and there's a satisfied pride in her smile and her voice when she says it-
"And she's my girlfriend"- and again he matches her-
Outside the Apartment:
"She bought it"- she was this first one to repeat the "lie" and she's also the first to draw back the curtain, as if to say "Remember that wasn't real, right?"
"Hook, line and sinker. We're good"- he matches her tone, yet again-
"Totally. So, you wanna get breakfast?"- sure, maybe she's just hungry...but, wait a second, isn't there fresh pancakes and bacon back in the apartment? That is why they finally had the "talk", after all. So it's clearly not just a matter of finding food- she wants to spend more time with him, one-on-one, even though they have been alone in her room for HOURS. The idea of going out for breakfast is also a highly visible, public declaration of some kind of relationship- and then he ups her by suggesting "brunch"- which has long been established as a purely couples' thing on this show.
She tries to up him by calling him "Sweetie pie"- to which he backs down, calling "Flugelhorn"- and she immediately agrees and backs down as well. And they walk away chuckling.
Epilogue:
"They don't realize they weren't lying."-Lily
I think she's half right. I think Barney knows he isn't lying, and Robin knows that she isn't lying, but I think they're still doubting what the other said, which is why they were so quick to gloat over pulling the wool over Lily's eyes, because that's safe, that's their "out" if it gets too emotional at this point.
After many, many viewings to analyze every word, pause, and hesitation, I find myself again marveling at how fantastic Cobie and Neil are together. They match each other, note for note, the entire time, and that is impressive. I've noticed that it's one-on-one scenes with Neil that can highlight the other actors' weaknesses, but Cobie can go toe-to-toe with him and completely hold her own. And I think that's part of what gives them such incredible chemistry, and makes the relationship between the characters so believable.