BSG Fic: 12 Days of Ficmas: Snippets in Time - Epiphanies
Title: 12 Days of Ficmas (Day Eleven): Snippets in Time - Epiphanies
Author: Monti
Date: March 2, 2007 (Original) December 23, 2009 (Revisited)
Rating: M
Word Count: 2247
Category: AU/PWP
Pairing: Lee/Kara
Warnings: Uh…smut, smut and more smut
Spoilers: Loose references to first and second season episodes…Resurrection Ship 1.
Disclaimer: Just gently (well…mostly) using these characters. They don’t belong to me.
Summary: Random scenarios from random episodes
Author’s Notes: These will be stand-alone stories. The only thing they’ll have in common is the title.
Author’s Additional Note: I got a bit creative with this one…hope you enjoy.
EPIPHANIES
Kara sat reading the after action report from the Dara Mozu explosion. Another close call…bodies flew out of the blast area and the Raptor just barely managed to clear the area.
Did Lee even bother to mention it since then?
Nope.
Just wrote down the facts and left. A week ago.
Yeah…something was really off with him.
Her pen tapped the pages of the report as Kara pondered how distant he’d been. She wasn’t kidding when she said she hadn’t seen him around much since his space walk. And truth told…she hadn’t made much effort to hunt him down.
She wondered if anyone else had and the guilt started closing in on her.
He’d stunned her with his admission of not wanting to come back after ejecting from the Blackbird.
Rock solid Lee Adama wishing for death?
Boggled the mind.
And she didn’t know how to deal with it. So…she hadn’t been there for him. Not really.
He’d thrown her for a complete loop and she had no idea what to say. After all, she was the one who was supposed to skirt the boundaries and pull it out of the fire.
Not Lee.
Lee was the one who played by the rules. And in her, albeit loosely defined, playbook Lee wasn’t allowed to do things like give up and not want to come home.
He was supposed to bounce back and be the same guy she’d known longer than Helo. Not disengage from life and crawl inside his head to hide away from everyone who cared about him.
But that was exactly what he was doing.
And it was time for it to stop.
Tossing the pen on the report, she pushed away from the table to stand. Shoving her fingers through her hair, she raked it back from her face to secure it with a holder.
She was the last person anyone would peg as shrink material…but Lee was her friend - hell he’d been her confessor more than a few times - and she would be there for him.
She could do that, right? Snap him out of whatever funk he was in and help him deal with the fallout. Sucking in a deep breath, she let it out again.
So why did she feel like she was flying blind?
Because this mattered.
Lee mattered.
And frankly, if it wasn’t behind the stick of a Viper or raking it in at the Triad table…Kara would be the first to tell anyone not to count on her for the heavy stuff. But if she frakked things up and couldn’t reach Lee, she had a feeling he’d make anything she ever pulled look amateurish in scope.
Filling her lungs with more air, she blew it out and left the Sit Room. Racetrack mentioned Lee was up on early CAP so Kara would hit the bunkroom, maybe he’d still be up and they could have a long overdue conversation.
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Lee’s head thrashed on the pillow while the dark, deadly images roamed through his dreams. He felt the pull, could hear it calling to him. Even in sleep, his eyes twitched as the explosions rocked his brain. They went off all around him and even though he couldn’t hear anything, his body involuntarily reacted as if he could. Flinching against the bright reverberations, it was a relief when they smoothed into the metallic lines of the Raptor where they’d brought him back from the brink of death.
He felt hot, a fine sheen of sweat glistening on his skin, his head stilled for a second. Then…he was back in the Raptor on its way to the Dara Mozu and…in that split second…the one finite moment with the voice broadcasting its ‘Demand Peace’ message, he knew…knew…what would happen.
Shouting orders on instinct they’d barely managed to get out of range, but they’d made it. And yet a part of him couldn’t shake feeling like he shouldn’t be alive.
Didn’t want to be alive.
Breathing harshly against the constricted feeling in his chest, he struggled to fight back the despair that haunted him. Why fight anymore? It wasn’t worth it. Shaking with denial, still sleeping fitfully, his mind reached out, trying to hold onto something before the darkness swallowed him.
Then he was back in the ejection seat, death a certainty and this time he welcomed it. But the faces flashed and he couldn’t stop them. His father’s, the president’s…both wanting something he didn’t think he could give them. Their disappointment hovered there…waiting to suck him in and he couldn’t face it.
Deal with it.
And then it was Kara’s face and he knew she would die. He wasn’t there with her, couldn’t have her back and she wouldn’t survive what she had to do. The pain of it grabbed him, clawed at him until he didn’t care any more…words of apology on his lips.
In the dream he saw her…raise the weapon, pull the trigger, her aim sure and true. And then, clear as the blinding explosions had been, he saw her fall. Watched the jolting of her body as multiple bullets took her down while he screamed her name in his head.
“KARA!”
He couldn’t breathe. The air wouldn’t fill his lungs because that same image kept running over and over. It wouldn’t stop and his body jerked each time it replayed. He couldn’t stand it, the pain of seeing her go down. And he could feel the hands of death grasping at him, calling him, saying his name…
“LEE!”
Kara shook him again. He was scaring her, trapped in a nightmare, unable to fight his way out. She knew the agony, had experienced it more times than she wanted to remember. And Lee’s issues were bigger than she’d imagined.
She cupped his face in her hands to still the thrashing of his head. “Lee. Wake up.” Kara’s voice was pitched low, her tone calm and soothing. “It’s a dream. Lee.” Her thumbs stroked his cheeks while she repeated the same words once, twice more before he jerked awake.
Unfocused eyes darted back and forth, while the last remnants of whatever unknown horror he’d been in fought to hang on. When his gaze finally settled on her face, she breathed with relief.
Gone were the stormy, terror filled eyes. In their place, startled but clear blue stared up at her.
“Hey, welcome back.” Kara moved one of her hands down to lace her fingers with his. They were like ice even though his skin was slick with sweat.
Lee never had nightmares…but he’d had this one every night since the close call last week. Couldn’t seem to shake it. Blinking, he felt a shudder go through him while his mind sorted it all out. Kara. Dream. She wasn’t dead…she was okay.
Sitting there holding his hand, her thumb making soothing strokes over his palm.
Blinking again, he looked up at her, saw the understanding etched over her features and realized he felt…
Warm.
The bone deep chill that usually settled in after the nightmare wasn’t there this time. Hell…who was he kidding? It wasn’t just the nightmare. He’d been enveloped in cold since ejecting from the Blackbird.
It dogged his every step, hovering in the shadows, making him doubt he should be alive.
And it was gone. Because of Kara.
Fully awake now, Lee’s fingers wrapped around the hand that held his and he met her gaze. Heard his sigh of relief, saw her tentative smile, and didn’t stop to think about his next action. Sliding his free hand to the back of her neck, he lifted his head and kissed her with passion, raw and unchecked. Partially because seeing her chased the shadows from his mind, but mainly because it was something he wanted.
Maybe even needed.
Because…Kara was his sun.
Burning hot…shining bright. And he wouldn't fight it anymore. Keeping her at arm’s length hadn’t stopped him from seeing her go down in his nightmares. Over and over again. The only thing it seemed to be doing was slowly killing him.
And he almost realized it too late.
Kara was surprised by the kiss, but damned if she was going to argue about it. No longer wrapped up in his nightmare, he was reaching out to her. It wasn’t how she expected it, but oh…this…this she could do.
Right now, he needed her and if it was only this one time, she could live with that. Yet somewhere - in a place she wasn’t really comfortable going to - she sort of hoped it wouldn’t be a single occurrence. She didn't want to examine where the hell that thought came from, so she stopped thinking and focused on assisting with Lee’s efforts to get her tanks over her head and out of the way.
Shirts off, she nudged Lee’s hip with her knee, letting him know she wanted to join him. Her lips met his again as he slid over so she could fold herself in along his side. They needed to make this more private, so she reached behind her and drew the curtains shut, effectively closing out everything and everyone else. The temperature in the closed berth kicked up a notch as the final barriers of clothing were removed and nothing else separated them.
Skin to skin, Lee’s hands skimmed down Kara’s sides to settle around her waist. Gazing at her, he looked for any indication she wasn’t ready for this. Seeing none, his lips hit hers again and he breathed even easier knowing Kara wanted him as much as he did her.
Hauling her on top of him, Lee didn’t hold anything back. He poured everything he couldn’t seem to say into actions instead. His lips ghosted across her throat, stopping so he could nip at her shoulder as Kara sat up, her palms braced on his chest. Finally his tongue traced a circle around her nipple before his lips closed over the peak, drawing it into his mouth.
Lee’s teeth teased over the sensitive tip and Kara gasped at the sensation. Her back arched tipping her breasts forward while her hips slid down, her clit bumping against the tip of his cock. Moaning at the contact, she rocked back and forth, wet with anticipation. Shifting slightly, she moved back, slowly grinding along the length of his erection watching Lee’s head fell back against the pillow with a low groan.
Gazing down at him with a sultry smile, Kara lifted up and quickly sank over him…not taking the time to savor it. She was too far gone to go slow. With quick motions she rocked her hips, meeting Lee’s mouth in a kiss hot enough to singe the steel of a Viper. Sliding her tongue between his lips, Kara felt the heat that arced between them and knew without a doubt this wouldn’t be the last time for them.
He’d never get enough of her.
The thought ran through Lee’s head as the breath caught in his throat at the feel of her wrapped around him. The exquisiteness of Kara moving over him, her tongue dueling with his, was almost more than he could bear…and he never wanted it to end.
Moving with her, he felt the ebb and flow of the building friction as it drew him in like a vortex. His control hanging by a thread, his fingers tangled in her hair, dislodging the rest of it from its holder. As the strands hit his skin like a caress, he pitched his hips upward sending Kara over the edge as she broke with a shuddering orgasm.
Lee followed right behind her, his release like a blinding light exploding in his head. He barely registered Kara collapsing on top of his chest…just wrapped his arms around her until instinct kicked in and he remembered how to breathe.
Lee didn’t think he’d ever be cold again - not after tonight. Kara chased the haunting shadows away like a raging sun storm. He could get used to her sprawled on top of him, boneless and spent from the exertion of making love.
And damn if he wasn’t content to have her head resting right over his heart.
He felt complete…something he’d never experienced before now.
But as much as he wanted to stay lost in the moment, he knew he needed to talk to her. Tell her everything and hope she’d understand. If she turned away from him, he’d survive…but he’d be less than he was…even more so now.
Running his hand lightly over her back, Lee whispered her name. “Kara…” When she stirred, lifting her head to meet his eyes, he tried to find the words. “I…” Gazing at her, knowing what she meant to him, he didn’t know where to even start.
Kara sympathized with Lee’s difficulty. She’d never had anyone to listen after a nightmare and being able to voice the fear was something he needed to do. Knowing Lee, it wouldn't be easy to hear and she knew instinctively his nightmare involved her somehow.
But being with him had given her an epiphany of sorts and she didn’t just want to be supportive, she needed him to lean on her.
Still holding his gaze, Kara maneuvered sideways and settled on the bed next to Lee. Searching out and finding his hand, she laced their fingers together then pulled herself snug against him.
Speaking softly, in the hopes of giving him an opening, she stated. “Let’s start with the dream…”
Giving his fingers a gentle squeeze, she added. “…then we can go on from there.”
FIN