friday night is so many faces
i feel sorta superalien and tired but okay. tonight was crazy. i went to my aa meeting and it was anniversary night and an old friend of mine who i helped get sober was celebrating and he singled me out and i felt really shy but super good about it. i had just been working on steps with my new sponsee. yay sobriety.
then i went to kimya's -off the sauce- party and it was *packed* i didnt expect it to be so intense! i guess i should have expected. regina was there and she hasnt completely forgetten me in all of her busy-ness as i expected and it was cool to see her face light up and she gave me a really big hug.
sometimes i think its weird that i go to every possible show i can of hers... but i go to all of her shows because its just so grounding and inspiring. shes got good medicine, and i try to stay close to anything that makes me glad to be alive. i laughed so much tonight my cheeks hurt.
either way i walked away from the show feeling intense and worn out. glad i got my batteries recharged on the inside, but the cold and all of the socializing made me start to wear down on the outside. so now im just wondering where in the world jacqueline is... on a plane? i think so... and missing her, wishing we could curl up together tonight, even though i know she'll be here in a week... please let her land safely and happily and send her sweet dreams and calm up there in the sky~
okay. i should really sleep. i drove home with no heat and very little gas... my heat breaks every other day it seems. oh well~
speaking of heat. my apartment is freezing. time to make a trip to the scary-ass basement.
woo-hoo
x mk
ps: funny, i just realized i came here to write about how i feel gard to know and akward, but then i wrote all of the better stuff instead. i feel like life is getting good, and i feel a little uncomfortable in my skin about it all. but thats just life, right? and it seems this has been a running theme with me for awhile now... my fear of happiness. humans are built so funny and great. i feel lucky to be so silly and overcomplicated.
pps: the violin player for edison woods (max, who i love to pieces) is playing with patty griffin next week, and its a free show at one of my favorite venues in the world (angel oresanz center). max is putting us (me and jacq) on the list so if it gets full we will get in for sure. i feel so lucky!!!
ppps: in a week and a day (feb 4th) i will have been sober for 6 years. wtf?
then i went to kimya's -off the sauce- party and it was *packed* i didnt expect it to be so intense! i guess i should have expected. regina was there and she hasnt completely forgetten me in all of her busy-ness as i expected and it was cool to see her face light up and she gave me a really big hug.
sometimes i think its weird that i go to every possible show i can of hers... but i go to all of her shows because its just so grounding and inspiring. shes got good medicine, and i try to stay close to anything that makes me glad to be alive. i laughed so much tonight my cheeks hurt.
either way i walked away from the show feeling intense and worn out. glad i got my batteries recharged on the inside, but the cold and all of the socializing made me start to wear down on the outside. so now im just wondering where in the world jacqueline is... on a plane? i think so... and missing her, wishing we could curl up together tonight, even though i know she'll be here in a week... please let her land safely and happily and send her sweet dreams and calm up there in the sky~
okay. i should really sleep. i drove home with no heat and very little gas... my heat breaks every other day it seems. oh well~
speaking of heat. my apartment is freezing. time to make a trip to the scary-ass basement.
woo-hoo
x mk
ps: funny, i just realized i came here to write about how i feel gard to know and akward, but then i wrote all of the better stuff instead. i feel like life is getting good, and i feel a little uncomfortable in my skin about it all. but thats just life, right? and it seems this has been a running theme with me for awhile now... my fear of happiness. humans are built so funny and great. i feel lucky to be so silly and overcomplicated.
pps: the violin player for edison woods (max, who i love to pieces) is playing with patty griffin next week, and its a free show at one of my favorite venues in the world (angel oresanz center). max is putting us (me and jacq) on the list so if it gets full we will get in for sure. i feel so lucky!!!
ppps: in a week and a day (feb 4th) i will have been sober for 6 years. wtf?