I wish I’d read up on psychopathic tendencies before meeting my ex. I would have never even wasted my time on that lunatic.
The parasitic lifestyle part really jumped out at me. The guy was a shameless mooch. He refused to work or contribute. He wanted to be taken care of and live carefree at someone else’s expense.
He robbed his own family members so he wouldn’t have to work. I’m talking burglarized them, even stole a car and sold it to a chop shop in J-town. They don’t know to this day that their little angelito did that, but I wish they did, because they practically worshiped him and he was such an ungrateful scumbag. His parents knew about one of the burglaries because it was his father’s godmother and she came home while he was breaking into her house. He showed up at my work soon after, panting, sweaty and red-faced, forcing me to take back my car keys. (He took my car a lot.) And when I hesitated because I was suspicious and asking questions, he cussed me out and threatened me. He was physically violent, so I didn’t argue. In retrospect, I wish I had called the cops on him, even though I didn’t know yet what he’d done.
When the cops finally ran his prints, he got busted and had to come clean. His parents hid it from the rest of their family because they were mortified and his mom wanted them to appear perfect to everyone else. They even begged the godmother to drop the charges, and she did. That’s how much they all enabled him.
His mom told me I was a bad wife because I refused to help bail him out of jail. And because I didn’t cook and do laundry for him. I told her he was a shitty spouse because he didn’t pull his weight and he was a cheater, druggie, and a criminal, but she saw no issue with that. According to her, I manipulated him into doing all those things. 🙄
He would cry like a little bitch when I called him a leech. I never said anything that wasn’t true, though. He just didn’t like being called out on his gross behavior. He knew deep down he indeed was a a pathetic leech.
I hate insulting leeches, though, because even they serve a purpose. This dude was just a useless shit stain.
I was watching Signs of a Psychopath on ID and they discussed this trait in serial murderers and it just struck a chord in me. I flashed back to all the signs that were in my face about my ex back then but didn’t realize how dangerous they really were.
He checks off a lot of the traits, actually, but that one stood out because he mooched off of me and my family, as well as his own and even his friends. He used people to get stuff out of them: money, food, a place to stay, clothes, drugs, booze, etc. And from women he was always using charm and sex to get stuff out of them. When that no longer worked on me, he’d get violent and seek revenge. I became the enemy.
I hate him so much. He pops up in my dreams sometimes and it disturbs the hell out of me. I feel like the devil incarnate is trying to haunt me, torment me. He never leaves me be and I hate him for scarring my mind w his evilness and abuse.
I’ll never forget how he took off to Vegas on the pretense of “getting a job” but spent a week partying and draining my bank account. He was using the money I worked for to buy booze and food for him and his friend and to hit up strip clubs. My checks to pay my bills were bouncing, and my mom had to help bail me out. I closed the account and started my own, and immediately he threw a fit. Instead of being sorry about what he did, he cussed me out for not allowing him to steal my paychecks so he could party it up. And he hated my mom for helping me get my credit back on track.
I hope he’s burning in hell. Evil sonofabitch.
Anyway, as you can see, I’m still working through it. I don’t know if I’ll ever be healed from it, but it helps to write/talk about it. Had I known the signs, I wouldn’t have ptsd from this experience.