[Fic: RPF] Stay
Title: Stay
Pairing: Nick/Selena
Rating/Word Count: PG/781
Disclaimer: I do not own Nick Jonas or Selena Gomez or any of the other real people used and/or mentioned in this fic. None of the portrayed events actually happened (no matter how much I wish they did); they are fiction. Other disclaimers in profile.
A/N: Drabble written out of random inspiration one night months ago after hearing "Rose Garden" for the first time, then picked back up again once I actually got a listen to "Stay." This story takes place earlier this year (January-February 2010) during Nick's tour with The Administration when Selena attended every other gig and Nelena had a shot in hell of happening again. Thanks to letscall_l for encouraging me to dig this out, edit it, and post it (though it absolutely pales in comparison to "I Can't Stop Loving You (Can't Stop Loving You)" and the epicness of your Nelena). Hope you guys enjoy!
Summary: Nick reflects on his relationship with Selena: all the things he's learned, all the things he wishes he could say, and the one thing he wants more than anything else.
He thinks that maybe they might be soul mates, whether they ever fully get back together or not. Far too different from one another, yet also way too alike. He was still a kid, rebounding from his first real love. He was already one of those kids that has a difficult time adjusting to any kind of change, so he just tried to change her instead. Just shy of sixteen at the time, a kid unable to be what Selena herself didn’t realize she needed, what she still needs: a safe harbor in the surrounding storms of their lives. Someone who wouldn’t try to suppress the long-buried inner child when she came out to play, who would just hold her close when she cried the tears of a girl far older than seventeen without quite knowing why, never pressing her to explain that which she didn’t understand and never again mentioning the few times anyone ever saw her shatter.
She’s his muse, in an odd sort of way. Nick is the master of obvious songwriting, and his very life, heart and soul are written in every calloused fingertip, every melancholy chord, every tear-stained lyric sheet. Miley’s songs were sweeping powerful declarations of a love to the depths of which that he’d never felt before and hadn’t again since. His songs about life with diabetes, about the road and the band and the desire to find the self he’d lost along the way, all spoke powerful messages different in uniquely similar ways.
Selena’s songs, however, were unlike any he’d ever written before. Beautifully allegorical and symbolic, describing her in images full of pain and beauty and fury, all like this girl who opened his eyes to a world he’d never before imagined, of a fragile little girl who desperately yearned to prove that her existence wasn’t a mistake, that she could shoulder the burdens she’d created on her own tiny shoulders. He didn’t know or understand back then her motivation for the perfectionism they shared; he simultaneously loved and hated how Selena began to change into who he wanted her to be, only to withdraw further into herself and back into that shy little girl that only Demi ever fully knew.
Now he finally understands that he’s a failure with girls. He let Miley down when she needed him the most, Taylor because he never thought to warn her that Joe would eventually get bored and move on, Demi when she entrusted her best friend’s heart to him only for him to break it (after which she punched him in the chest with angry little ineffectual fists), and of course he let Selena down. Not just by changing her or breaking her heart, but by joining the long list of leavers in her young life. Her father left when he was barely the age that Kevin is now, unable to cope with sudden marriage and fatherhood. Her friends all abandoned her when she became a star, Demi took off on tour, leaving Selena behind at Disney while she moved onto the LA scene. Nick left because she was too much and not enough all at once, but now he finally sees that the darker parts of her mind give her a depth that’s strikingly beautiful. That beauty is because of those darker parts and not in spite of them, like he’d long ago thought.
His performances of “Rose Garden” and the idea to release it as the next single are the outward manifestations of a new promise: a year without fear, for himself and for her. He knows her, really knows her after these past few years, well enough to realize why she won’t give in. Partly she's hanging onto her stubborn pride, but mostly Selena’s deathly afraid to trust him again. But he’s determined to break through her walls, prove to her that he's no longer just the stupid naive kid writing songs about breaking up on IM.
He makes a vow to be the man that he knows now that she needs, that never again will Selena stand alone unless she chooses to. There's so many things that he should've told her, so many things he thought she knew, so many things left unsaid. But now he knows that he can't keep dwelling on what might have been, not when Selena's waiting for him to earn one last chance before she runs scared like so many times before. All that really matters now is for Nick to finally give Selena a good reason to stay, and with that, he picks up his pen and his guitar and begins to do so in the only way he's ever known.
Pairing: Nick/Selena
Rating/Word Count: PG/781
Disclaimer: I do not own Nick Jonas or Selena Gomez or any of the other real people used and/or mentioned in this fic. None of the portrayed events actually happened (no matter how much I wish they did); they are fiction. Other disclaimers in profile.
A/N: Drabble written out of random inspiration one night months ago after hearing "Rose Garden" for the first time, then picked back up again once I actually got a listen to "Stay." This story takes place earlier this year (January-February 2010) during Nick's tour with The Administration when Selena attended every other gig and Nelena had a shot in hell of happening again. Thanks to letscall_l for encouraging me to dig this out, edit it, and post it (though it absolutely pales in comparison to "I Can't Stop Loving You (Can't Stop Loving You)" and the epicness of your Nelena). Hope you guys enjoy!
Summary: Nick reflects on his relationship with Selena: all the things he's learned, all the things he wishes he could say, and the one thing he wants more than anything else.
He thinks that maybe they might be soul mates, whether they ever fully get back together or not. Far too different from one another, yet also way too alike. He was still a kid, rebounding from his first real love. He was already one of those kids that has a difficult time adjusting to any kind of change, so he just tried to change her instead. Just shy of sixteen at the time, a kid unable to be what Selena herself didn’t realize she needed, what she still needs: a safe harbor in the surrounding storms of their lives. Someone who wouldn’t try to suppress the long-buried inner child when she came out to play, who would just hold her close when she cried the tears of a girl far older than seventeen without quite knowing why, never pressing her to explain that which she didn’t understand and never again mentioning the few times anyone ever saw her shatter.
She’s his muse, in an odd sort of way. Nick is the master of obvious songwriting, and his very life, heart and soul are written in every calloused fingertip, every melancholy chord, every tear-stained lyric sheet. Miley’s songs were sweeping powerful declarations of a love to the depths of which that he’d never felt before and hadn’t again since. His songs about life with diabetes, about the road and the band and the desire to find the self he’d lost along the way, all spoke powerful messages different in uniquely similar ways.
Selena’s songs, however, were unlike any he’d ever written before. Beautifully allegorical and symbolic, describing her in images full of pain and beauty and fury, all like this girl who opened his eyes to a world he’d never before imagined, of a fragile little girl who desperately yearned to prove that her existence wasn’t a mistake, that she could shoulder the burdens she’d created on her own tiny shoulders. He didn’t know or understand back then her motivation for the perfectionism they shared; he simultaneously loved and hated how Selena began to change into who he wanted her to be, only to withdraw further into herself and back into that shy little girl that only Demi ever fully knew.
Now he finally understands that he’s a failure with girls. He let Miley down when she needed him the most, Taylor because he never thought to warn her that Joe would eventually get bored and move on, Demi when she entrusted her best friend’s heart to him only for him to break it (after which she punched him in the chest with angry little ineffectual fists), and of course he let Selena down. Not just by changing her or breaking her heart, but by joining the long list of leavers in her young life. Her father left when he was barely the age that Kevin is now, unable to cope with sudden marriage and fatherhood. Her friends all abandoned her when she became a star, Demi took off on tour, leaving Selena behind at Disney while she moved onto the LA scene. Nick left because she was too much and not enough all at once, but now he finally sees that the darker parts of her mind give her a depth that’s strikingly beautiful. That beauty is because of those darker parts and not in spite of them, like he’d long ago thought.
His performances of “Rose Garden” and the idea to release it as the next single are the outward manifestations of a new promise: a year without fear, for himself and for her. He knows her, really knows her after these past few years, well enough to realize why she won’t give in. Partly she's hanging onto her stubborn pride, but mostly Selena’s deathly afraid to trust him again. But he’s determined to break through her walls, prove to her that he's no longer just the stupid naive kid writing songs about breaking up on IM.
He makes a vow to be the man that he knows now that she needs, that never again will Selena stand alone unless she chooses to. There's so many things that he should've told her, so many things he thought she knew, so many things left unsaid. But now he knows that he can't keep dwelling on what might have been, not when Selena's waiting for him to earn one last chance before she runs scared like so many times before. All that really matters now is for Nick to finally give Selena a good reason to stay, and with that, he picks up his pen and his guitar and begins to do so in the only way he's ever known.