Sexism in football
This whole Andy Gray row has made me very uncomfortable. I love football but I hate the sexism that is so much a part and parcel of it. I'm not remotely surprised that so-called "pundits" have sexist views in private. It's endemic throughout the sport. Hopefully less amongst the clubs themselves than the fans, but the fans are awful.
We've had a female "referee's assistant" a couple of times (Amy Rayner) and I have to say that she wasn't the best, but she was NO WORSE THAN A LOT OF MEN I've seen, and yet they say about her "this is why women shouldn't officiate" when she gets a decision wrong. I've never heard anyone say "this is why men shouldn't officiate" when we have a poor male ref or lino. They just say "the ref / lino was rubbish today." Karren Brady (whom I have no great love for) has it absolutely spot on when she says that only women are judged according to their gender in the game.
I hate the fans singing "Get your tits out for the lads" at any fit female who happens to work as a physiotherapist or a photographer or St Johns Ambulance volunteer and so has to walk along the edge of the pitch in front of a baying mob of fans. I hate them singing "Are you a man or a woman?" at a female steward with a short haircut and a chunky figure. I hate the "lads culture" in general and I hate that when I object to it, I get told either that it's just a laugh and I have no sense of humour, or that my objection is just proof that women shouldn't go to games but stay at home and do the ironing.
About 18 months ago my football club was looking for volunteer photographers to take photos at games. I considered applying - in fact I put my name forward in the first instance - but in the end I decided I'm not thick-skinned enough to put up with any abuse I might get. I felt ashamed of myself for chickening out, but I just wasn't up for the fight. I really love going to footie games (for the most part) and I didn't want to turn it into something I dreaded.
It probably doesn't help that I support a northern club. It's a northern stereotype that I'm afraid is true. There really is a lot more (overt) sexism up there. That's not to say everyone is like that. There are a lot of male fans who don't like it either but generally they don't speak up. Obviously my bf doesn't participate (I wouldn't be with him if he did) but most of his friends are, and he doesn't contradict them, possibly because they'd regard him as less of a man if he did. He just pulls a wry face at me and looks embarrassed.
I have to confess that most of the time, I just bury my head in the sand and ignore it. If anyone says something objectionable in the pub, I will say something, then I either get an "Oh sorry love, didn't mean you" or the aforementioned "If you don't like it, go home and do the ironing". What should I do?
To a certain extent I also keep quiet because I don't want to embarrass my bf. He'd probably be told not to bring me to the pub again and then he'd have to choose between me and his friends. I don't want to put him in that situation. It's not something that happens every time we see them, anyway, just very rarely.
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We had a big discussion about it at work the other day. My (male) colleagues seemed to think Mr Gray had been harshly treated and it's not such a big issue. I asked them, if it had been a black linesman and he'd said "Someone had better explain the offside rule to him, blacks aren't capable of understanding it," how would they feel about that?
They also said that the subject of the remarks hadn't made a complaint so, if she hasn't taken offence, why should any action be taken against the perpetrator? I said but what about all the other women who HAVE taken offence and, as a result, decide they don't want to get involved in football, when they might have been considering it. I told them about my own cowardice over the photography issue. They conceded that I have a point. But they still say there has to be some allowance for "banter" and humour.
I feel as if I'm banging my head against a brick wall. Have we fallen into a time tunnel and returned to the 1970s? Don't even get me started on the proliferation of "soft porn" in advertising, mens mags and the sexual objectification of women...
We've had a female "referee's assistant" a couple of times (Amy Rayner) and I have to say that she wasn't the best, but she was NO WORSE THAN A LOT OF MEN I've seen, and yet they say about her "this is why women shouldn't officiate" when she gets a decision wrong. I've never heard anyone say "this is why men shouldn't officiate" when we have a poor male ref or lino. They just say "the ref / lino was rubbish today." Karren Brady (whom I have no great love for) has it absolutely spot on when she says that only women are judged according to their gender in the game.
I hate the fans singing "Get your tits out for the lads" at any fit female who happens to work as a physiotherapist or a photographer or St Johns Ambulance volunteer and so has to walk along the edge of the pitch in front of a baying mob of fans. I hate them singing "Are you a man or a woman?" at a female steward with a short haircut and a chunky figure. I hate the "lads culture" in general and I hate that when I object to it, I get told either that it's just a laugh and I have no sense of humour, or that my objection is just proof that women shouldn't go to games but stay at home and do the ironing.
About 18 months ago my football club was looking for volunteer photographers to take photos at games. I considered applying - in fact I put my name forward in the first instance - but in the end I decided I'm not thick-skinned enough to put up with any abuse I might get. I felt ashamed of myself for chickening out, but I just wasn't up for the fight. I really love going to footie games (for the most part) and I didn't want to turn it into something I dreaded.
It probably doesn't help that I support a northern club. It's a northern stereotype that I'm afraid is true. There really is a lot more (overt) sexism up there. That's not to say everyone is like that. There are a lot of male fans who don't like it either but generally they don't speak up. Obviously my bf doesn't participate (I wouldn't be with him if he did) but most of his friends are, and he doesn't contradict them, possibly because they'd regard him as less of a man if he did. He just pulls a wry face at me and looks embarrassed.
I have to confess that most of the time, I just bury my head in the sand and ignore it. If anyone says something objectionable in the pub, I will say something, then I either get an "Oh sorry love, didn't mean you" or the aforementioned "If you don't like it, go home and do the ironing". What should I do?
To a certain extent I also keep quiet because I don't want to embarrass my bf. He'd probably be told not to bring me to the pub again and then he'd have to choose between me and his friends. I don't want to put him in that situation. It's not something that happens every time we see them, anyway, just very rarely.
_____________________________________
We had a big discussion about it at work the other day. My (male) colleagues seemed to think Mr Gray had been harshly treated and it's not such a big issue. I asked them, if it had been a black linesman and he'd said "Someone had better explain the offside rule to him, blacks aren't capable of understanding it," how would they feel about that?
They also said that the subject of the remarks hadn't made a complaint so, if she hasn't taken offence, why should any action be taken against the perpetrator? I said but what about all the other women who HAVE taken offence and, as a result, decide they don't want to get involved in football, when they might have been considering it. I told them about my own cowardice over the photography issue. They conceded that I have a point. But they still say there has to be some allowance for "banter" and humour.
I feel as if I'm banging my head against a brick wall. Have we fallen into a time tunnel and returned to the 1970s? Don't even get me started on the proliferation of "soft porn" in advertising, mens mags and the sexual objectification of women...