004 - Forevver Alone.

[misterwwizard]

Phone, unfiltered.[Eridan's been pretty confident about this whole new leaf he's been turning. He's got a moirail, a potential matesprit... Everything. Hell, he's even sure about this whole human homecoming dance thing...Doesn't care about filters for this because hey, he wants the whole world to hear his declarations

Comments

[crusthatecean]

No.

No, absolutely not. You complete shit sucking bilgesack. What the fuck is wrong with you?

private

[dreambubbly]

Karkat...please. I'm trying to wrap my head around everything Kanaya told me. And she told me everything. So please...just let me try and get my thinkpan straightened out before I go glubbing off the handle.

[Poor Fef hardly has a voice by now; too much crying.]

[crusthatecean]

Oh god.

Feferi, I'm so sorry. I should have told you right away, but I didn't know what to do.

[dreambubbly]

Don't worry...not your fault. You didn't make the situation so messed up.

[crusthatecean]

It...

[He wants to argue that it is his fault, he made the wrong decision, but that doesn't seem productive right now.]

Are you okay?

[dreambubbly]

...no. Not at all. I'm skipping the dance entirely. All motivation to go is now squarely in the pit of a load gaper.

[crusthatecean]

I don't blame you.

I understand if you don't really want to see me either right now, but do you want to talk?

[dreambubbly]

I don't have much of a voice left. I've all but made my own little sea with how much I've been crying. But - sometime tomorrow?

[crusthatecean]

Sure, I don't have anything going on.

I'm so sorry I let it get this far.

[misterwwizard]

Nothin's wrong with me I'm just tryin' to be a part a' this society.

[crusthatecean]

Because Feferi asked me to, I'm dropping this. I think you already know all I have to say to you, though.

Oh, and by the way, if I ever hear about you playing pan games with Gamzee again, I'm ripping whatever gross seadweller organs you have out through your spinal crevice.

[misterwwizard]

[well, there goes another friendship down the load gaper. Two at that. Let's face it, his friendships were doomed from the start, but he's had it at this point..he sighs loudly, feeling like he's pretty much fucked up everything ever]

I feel like I fuckin' messed everythin' up.

[crusthatecean]

Oh no. Please don't feel that way, Eridan. You didn't do anything wrong.

[misterwwizard]

Kar that's a whale a' shit an' you know it...

What would you have done if you were in my shoes? Not wantin' people to hate you for things an' start things off on a right foot...

[private]

[crusthatecean]

Of course I know it! It's called sarcasm, bulgesore.

And you're really braying up the wrong frond nub here because I have never once asked a single one of you not to hate me when I've deserved it. I wish they hated me more than they did, but until they do blame me for each and every thing that is my fault, I just have to hate myself enough for all of them.

So to answer your question, if I were in your shoes, I would do everyone a favor and never try to get back in their good graces and spend every available minute trying to change what I did and somehow make it up with them. Not, understand, because I think making it up to them will mean I deserve their regard again. It's just the absolute, most shamefully inadequate, least I can do.

[private]

[misterwwizard]

I don't think I could ever be truly hatin' you Kar. You've got a lot about you that's to be respectin'.
I can't really be changin' what I did back home, Kar... hell, I feel really fuckin' shitty about everythin' with Fef here because she wasn't hatin' me when I felt like she should...

I want to change, Kar. I've really tried to make some new waves. It's hard an' fustratin' an' at times its feelin' like the worlds against me again but I want to change. Now more than ever since all a' this crap's gone down an' I've made a real big fuckup.

So what should I be doin' Kar. How should I start?