A flatiron burned my ear today.

Actually, the truth is that I branded my ear with a flatiron this evening.

My ear was very naughty, you see. It lacked discretion and mercy, allowing unspeakable fragments of noise pollution to invade my consciousness.

I eat radioactive cheese with my dog on Saturdays ( Read more... )

Tomorrow is a holiday.

Sleep in. Do not report to work. Enjoy your favorite activities.

I could allow a game piece to control my life. I could allow words inspired by bitter relegation to a life in one's small high school home town burn a hole through my soul. Maybe I already have ( Read more... )

I lost half an eye ( Read more... )

Yes, I did ( Read more... )

I do not know you. I do not know your name ( Read more... )

A few days of silence, and I return energized with a new set of stories to tell. If you believe in the sincerity of my conversion, I will give you a quarter ( Read more... )

I admit it ( Read more... )

Elmer joined us for the evening. Uninvited he was, I might add ( Read more... )