Confessions of a Sour Patch Kid-eating, Bachelorette-watching 31 year-old
1. It is mid-afternoon and I have only done one thing on my list of things to do today. Also I was craving Sour Patch Kids, so I just got up and bought some. Feel free to judge.
2. I have gotten, once again, pathetically out of shape. I'm not beating myself up about it, though, because for the past couple months school has been servin' me up raw. I've heard a bit recently on Facebook and LJ about this C25K thing, particularly from people who have never run before or who thought they hated running. After checking it out, it reaffirms what I intuitively do to get back into shape with running - run in small increments, then walk for a bit, then run again, and so on. I usually use my iPod and do something like this:
Run for two songs, walk for one, run for three songs, walk for one, run for another two songs, walk for one, run one song....and so on. In this way I can go for a LOT longer than I could if I just ran in one go until I got tired and then stopped (which, if I'm being honest, when I'm terribly out of shape would only be ten or fifteen minutes tops).
So I thought I might try the C25K plan to get back into running form, but I'm not sure I'm feeling the first few weeks of the plan, which is SUPER light on running and heavy on walking. (1 min. jog, two min. walk type of thing.) Good for someone who's been sedentary for years, but for me it's only been a few months since my last run, and I'm pretty sure I can handle a bit more intensity. Then again, today's a hot day and I've been sitting around eating candy all day, so I'll see how this goes...
3. A couple weeks ago a woman at one of my tables asked me, (and it really helps to imagine this in a thick Southern accent), "Honey, do you know who got eliminated this week on 'The Bachelorette'? I missed it." And I replied with something like, "Oh, if I start watching that show, I'm done for. I get way too addicted."
And it's true! I know it's probably the worst crap on TV short of 'The Real Housewives' (which I also soooorrrrt of get, but it has nowhere near the addictive effect on me), and I shouldn't freely admit this, but I find 'The Bachelor/Bachelorette' fantastically compelling. I justify it by calling it a sociological experiment, but seriously, I stand behind the affirmation that it's educational programming.
And damn that Alabama vacationer and ABC for putting all the episodes online. I got to thinking what I was missing this season, and of course, now I know who was eliminated.
But what I really want to talk about is that horrible shit show that was the Vienna/Jake showdown last night. Oh my God. That's what I mean when I say the show is educational - it teaches you the fastest way to ruin a relationship and humiliate yourself on TV. That interview was so horrifically painful to watch, but the reason it was so painful was because it actually rang uncomfortably true in terms of some of the typical miscommunication between men and women. Maybe it seems I'm giving this horrible slice of trash television way too much credit, but it had an element of familiarity:
An overly emotional and co-dependent female - childish, cares but almost desperately so. Like she doesn't really care about her man so much as she cares about clinging to the relationship and needing approval. The cold, selfish, controlling male, who doesn't view his 'partner' as an equal (maybe more like an accessory), demands respect, but doesn't seem to have an ounce of respect for her - delusional, completely unmoved by any emotion other than anger. God, I hated both of these two, but they also seemed poster-children for what the stereotypical men and women do to sabotage relationships.
It makes me appreciate my grown-up man - always ALWAYS considerate, generous, gentle, and kind. I experienced my share of relationship hysterics throughout my early and mid-twenties with various partners, and I take full responsibility for contributing to the demise of those relationships. Vienna's crying might appear a manipulative tactic, but I recognize the lack of control and...just weakness that comes from pathetically clinging to an unhealthy relationship, deluding yourself into believing it's worth saving when really you're both so much better off apart.
I think the smooth waters that D. and I find ourselves on (for now, knock on wood) comes as much from the maturity of age and experience as from anything easygoing in our natures. I'm not sure we're necessarily wonderful people who magically happen to be wonderful for each other so much as we learned our lessons the hard way and grew up a bit. Neither Vienna nor Jake appear to be mature enough for the kind of compassion and compromise that a successful marriage requires. I always marvel at people who get married in their late teens/early twenties and seem to maintain successful and happy relationships. How on earth could you go through all that natural turmoil of growing up and make it work with a whole other fucked-up person by your side?
In case you don't mind watching something that will make you want to shower afterward:
2. I have gotten, once again, pathetically out of shape. I'm not beating myself up about it, though, because for the past couple months school has been servin' me up raw. I've heard a bit recently on Facebook and LJ about this C25K thing, particularly from people who have never run before or who thought they hated running. After checking it out, it reaffirms what I intuitively do to get back into shape with running - run in small increments, then walk for a bit, then run again, and so on. I usually use my iPod and do something like this:
Run for two songs, walk for one, run for three songs, walk for one, run for another two songs, walk for one, run one song....and so on. In this way I can go for a LOT longer than I could if I just ran in one go until I got tired and then stopped (which, if I'm being honest, when I'm terribly out of shape would only be ten or fifteen minutes tops).
So I thought I might try the C25K plan to get back into running form, but I'm not sure I'm feeling the first few weeks of the plan, which is SUPER light on running and heavy on walking. (1 min. jog, two min. walk type of thing.) Good for someone who's been sedentary for years, but for me it's only been a few months since my last run, and I'm pretty sure I can handle a bit more intensity. Then again, today's a hot day and I've been sitting around eating candy all day, so I'll see how this goes...
3. A couple weeks ago a woman at one of my tables asked me, (and it really helps to imagine this in a thick Southern accent), "Honey, do you know who got eliminated this week on 'The Bachelorette'? I missed it." And I replied with something like, "Oh, if I start watching that show, I'm done for. I get way too addicted."
And it's true! I know it's probably the worst crap on TV short of 'The Real Housewives' (which I also soooorrrrt of get, but it has nowhere near the addictive effect on me), and I shouldn't freely admit this, but I find 'The Bachelor/Bachelorette' fantastically compelling. I justify it by calling it a sociological experiment, but seriously, I stand behind the affirmation that it's educational programming.
And damn that Alabama vacationer and ABC for putting all the episodes online. I got to thinking what I was missing this season, and of course, now I know who was eliminated.
But what I really want to talk about is that horrible shit show that was the Vienna/Jake showdown last night. Oh my God. That's what I mean when I say the show is educational - it teaches you the fastest way to ruin a relationship and humiliate yourself on TV. That interview was so horrifically painful to watch, but the reason it was so painful was because it actually rang uncomfortably true in terms of some of the typical miscommunication between men and women. Maybe it seems I'm giving this horrible slice of trash television way too much credit, but it had an element of familiarity:
An overly emotional and co-dependent female - childish, cares but almost desperately so. Like she doesn't really care about her man so much as she cares about clinging to the relationship and needing approval. The cold, selfish, controlling male, who doesn't view his 'partner' as an equal (maybe more like an accessory), demands respect, but doesn't seem to have an ounce of respect for her - delusional, completely unmoved by any emotion other than anger. God, I hated both of these two, but they also seemed poster-children for what the stereotypical men and women do to sabotage relationships.
It makes me appreciate my grown-up man - always ALWAYS considerate, generous, gentle, and kind. I experienced my share of relationship hysterics throughout my early and mid-twenties with various partners, and I take full responsibility for contributing to the demise of those relationships. Vienna's crying might appear a manipulative tactic, but I recognize the lack of control and...just weakness that comes from pathetically clinging to an unhealthy relationship, deluding yourself into believing it's worth saving when really you're both so much better off apart.
I think the smooth waters that D. and I find ourselves on (for now, knock on wood) comes as much from the maturity of age and experience as from anything easygoing in our natures. I'm not sure we're necessarily wonderful people who magically happen to be wonderful for each other so much as we learned our lessons the hard way and grew up a bit. Neither Vienna nor Jake appear to be mature enough for the kind of compassion and compromise that a successful marriage requires. I always marvel at people who get married in their late teens/early twenties and seem to maintain successful and happy relationships. How on earth could you go through all that natural turmoil of growing up and make it work with a whole other fucked-up person by your side?
In case you don't mind watching something that will make you want to shower afterward:
Click to view