Employment Application
EMPLOYMENT APPLICATION
POISTION: A Date for Me
JOB DESCRIPTION: Lots of long nights and steamy moments ;).
QUALIFICATIONS: Ages 20-25 with some exceptions, no experience required. Must be funny, romantic, and of course tall, dark, and handsom.
1) Name
2) Birth Date
3) Location of Residence
4) Occupation
5) Yearly Salary
LIFE
1) Explain your smoking, drinking, and drug habbits.
2) List any criminal convictions you may have/had
3) Have you ever been in jail
4) Have you ever been marride and do you have any children
5) What are your goals for the future
5) Explain your past relationship(s) and why it ended
DATING
1) What are your views on long term relationship and marriage
2) What are your view on one night stands and "friends with bennifits"
3)Which of the above do you prefer
4) What was your longest relationship
5) Describe in detail- a first date with you
6) What can you offer a mate
7) What do you expect in a mate
8) Turn-ons/Turn-offs
THE JOB
1) Why do you feel your qualified for this job
2) What qualities could you bring to the position
3) What weaknesses may you have with the position
4) Date you can start
5) Give me one good reason why i should hire you
Going back to highschool....copied this from some girl at work-maybe itll work :) Since Josh is deffinatly in the gutter for GOOD!
WHAT I WANT HIM TO WANT
Well, I'll never forget the first time that I heard
That pretty mouth say that dirty word
And I can't even remember now
What she backed my truck into
But she covered her mouth and her face got red
And she just looked so darn cute
That I couldn't even act like I was mad.
Yeah, I live for little moments like that.
That's like just last year on my birthday
She lost all track of time and burnt the cake
And every smoke detector in the house was going off
And she was just about to cry until I took her in my arms
And I tried not to let her see me laugh.
Yeah, I live for little moments like that.
I know she's not perfect
But she tries so hard for me
And I thank God that she isn't
'Cause how boring would that be
It's the little imperfections
It's the sudden change of plans
When she misreads the directions
And we're lost but holding hands.
Yeah, I live for little moments like that.
When she's laying on my shoulder
On the sofa in the dark
And about the time she falls asleep
So does my right arm
And I want so bad to move it
'Cause it's tingling and it's numb
She looks so much like an angel
That I don't want to wake her up.
Yeah, I live for little moments.
When she steals my heart again
And doesn't even know it.
Yeah, I live for little moments like that
-Little Moments, Brad Paisley
There ain't a woman in the world
That wants to hear the word, yes
When she asks you if you think
That she looks chubby in that dress.
And if she cooks all day
You better eat it with a smile
It doesn't matter if it tastes just like
Bad gravy on a Goodyear tire.
(Yeah, yeah, yeah) all right
So you bend the truth
(Yeah, yeah, yeah) that's somethin'
That you'll have to get use to.
That's love you'll see
We all commit a little bit of perjury
Ah, but that's no crime if you ask me, that's love.
You're starin' at a burnt steak
You bite the bullet and you clean your plate
And then you go on and on about how great it was
That's not a lie, that's love.
Well, it's the very same thing
That she does for you
When she doesn't bring up
The fifteen pounds you need to lose
And every time she runs
Her fingers through your hair
And she says she kinda likes
The way there's not as much of it there.
-Thats Love, Brad Paisley