Hello there.. my angel from my nightmare.
It's interesting, what I noticed about myself today. If I just let go, and not try to control what's happening, I'm happier. I don't stress out about stupid stuff.
Also... I love the beach. The beach just makes things a hundred percent better.I love taking pictures there and everything
The above was written Sunday. Just had to put that down.
But on a further note, I've noticed my old self coming back. Definitely maturer and better I think, but it's interesting where confidence can take you. Especially when you're not trying to impress anyone.
This sounds stupid but it's just something.
So the game of Spoons. If anyone has EVER played with this girl Victoria, she's brutal. But see, my theory or observation or whatever goes like this. I can tell a lot about myself by how I play. For instance, several years ago, at Ryan's 18th birthday party, I remember being an animal myself. I would fight for the spoon. The last couple of years, I gave up. Because I didn't want to cross any lines or something stupid like that. God forbid, anyone remember it's actually a game! But then, tonight, I let go. And I became a piece of my old self. And that self fought Vic for a spoon. And mind you, she's brutal and she won it, but I fought back. And dang it, I liked it.
So things have been changing lately. And I've been figuring out who and where I need to be for the here and now. It's nice.
And that's the other thing... I have been living in the here and now. I always plan, it's what I do. But right now, not wishing this or hoping for that. But being content. And making do. It's interesting how much more fun you have when this happens.
And that's all for tonight.
And Nai, you were with me in spirit. I listened to your music and thought of you often. I love you!
Love you too Vic, for trying so hard and just being plain awesome. Even if you do stick sand down my bathing suit. UGH!!!
:.. Bee ..:
Also... I love the beach. The beach just makes things a hundred percent better.I love taking pictures there and everything
The above was written Sunday. Just had to put that down.
But on a further note, I've noticed my old self coming back. Definitely maturer and better I think, but it's interesting where confidence can take you. Especially when you're not trying to impress anyone.
This sounds stupid but it's just something.
So the game of Spoons. If anyone has EVER played with this girl Victoria, she's brutal. But see, my theory or observation or whatever goes like this. I can tell a lot about myself by how I play. For instance, several years ago, at Ryan's 18th birthday party, I remember being an animal myself. I would fight for the spoon. The last couple of years, I gave up. Because I didn't want to cross any lines or something stupid like that. God forbid, anyone remember it's actually a game! But then, tonight, I let go. And I became a piece of my old self. And that self fought Vic for a spoon. And mind you, she's brutal and she won it, but I fought back. And dang it, I liked it.
So things have been changing lately. And I've been figuring out who and where I need to be for the here and now. It's nice.
And that's the other thing... I have been living in the here and now. I always plan, it's what I do. But right now, not wishing this or hoping for that. But being content. And making do. It's interesting how much more fun you have when this happens.
And that's all for tonight.
And Nai, you were with me in spirit. I listened to your music and thought of you often. I love you!
Love you too Vic, for trying so hard and just being plain awesome. Even if you do stick sand down my bathing suit. UGH!!!
:.. Bee ..: