Hypocrisy
So, my grandparents just got back from the store. Walmart, to be exact. Everytime I'm down here, my grandmother always tells me how fat I'm getting and that I'm not pretty because I'm fat and a whole bunch of other negative comments that that just drop my self-esteem. Well, I keep telling her that I don't eat much at home. I really don't. I only eat supper at home and throughout the day I'll eat a slice of bread or two. So, I don't really eat anything at home. My parents don't stock up on sweets. I never get any candy when I'm at home and the chance for a coke is very slim. When I get here, there's tons of sweets. My grandparents have ten pizza's in the oven. The fridge is packed with cokes and juices and icecream. The counter's are covered with things like oatmeal cookies, brownies, chips, chocolatecovered rainsins and pretzels. The pantry has five boxes of cake and brownie mix. It's a fat kid's haven. I always tell them not buy sweets. They complain that I'm fat, yet everytime I'm here they have something new to munch on. I'm the kind of person where if it's put in my face, I'll eat it. My grandmother get's upset when I don't eat the stuff and then when I do, I get in trouble. It's like "What the hell?" And just now, they came back from the store with another pizza, more chocolate candies, two more packs of cokes, and more cookies and such. It's ridiculous. I just caught my grandmother opening her second pack of 'My Valentine Brownies'. There's two in a pack, making that four brownies and she calls me fat. Sounds like a hypocrite to me.
This morning I sat down in a chair wrong, and a bit too fast and the rocker part broke on it. Not completely, but it popped and stuff and my grandmother yells at me because it was 'my fat ass that broke it'. That's complete bullshit. I just sat in it wrong. I'm really sick of it. I know I'm not the skinniest person in the world. I know that. I don't need constant reminding every time I come over. Telling me that just lowers my self-esteem and negative comments like that are not good for me. I'm finally regaining confidence in myself and I don't need to be reminded of my flaws over and over again. Love me for what and who I am, for Christ's sake.
Okay. I'm done ranting about that. It's pissed me off enough. What should I talk about now? I have no idea. I'll post again later today.