Kiss Me in the Dark
The more I get to know people the more I seem to really not understand them, and I guess it’s because we’re all so different in so many ways. But, I always try to understand where people are coming from..yet sometimes it’s so hard & it frustrates me becuz I don’t see where they’re coming from at all. One of the things I don’t understand is how someone can jump from one person to the next..and actually show with each person love, compassion & spend soo much time & memories with these people & then one day seemingly out of the blue they don’t want anything to do with you & move on to the next person that they already had lined up. Then leave you standing there wondering what the hell you did or what the hell went wrong in the whole situation..then you ask them to explain what happened or how their feelings changed..and they can never give you a straight answer. It’s like really? I just wanna know..it may hurt me but I’d honestly rather hear the truth so maybe I can work on that & be better in the next relationship..then sometimes they give you reasons that are completely uncontrollable..like age difference..or working together..& it’s just like really? I can’t control that! Give me a reason that I can actually control! Sometimes though, when you really think about it, you don’t want a reason at all you just want them to realize what they’re missing & come back to you & everything be okay..but once you’ve lost trust in someone or they’ve hurt you so much, if they were to come back nothing would ever be the same..because you’d never be able to trust them again or things would just be awkward in certain situations & you’d feel like you’d have to watch what you said & did the whole time. You probably could never truly be yourself again..but I honestly think that if you can communicate with each other & be mature & listen to one another then you can make things work out..& you could possibly grow into something much more stronger than you ever were before. There’s so many things that I’ve been thinking about lately it would take me a year to write them all out..but I’ve grown so much as a person in the past 8 months & gotten so much calmer about everything..even though for awhile I was somewhat an emotional wreck..I honestly love who I’ve become, & I think the next person to get my heart is gonna be lucky! I just hope they see that too...