Berian: Have you seen my pants?
Me: What did you do with them?
Berian: I flung them off in a pit of fashion. [pause] No, wait, that's not right. [pause] Stop laughing at me.

[sitting on the sofa, watching tv with puppy ( Read more... )

[in a restaurant with my father ( Read more... )

I GOT THE JOB!

Everyone thought it was going to go to Tian, but no, I got it! And so I have to move to London pretty much as soon as possible!

I have less than two weeks til I leave for Italy, and less than seven weeks until I go to Las Vegas and New York.

We're still looking for a third girl to move into the house. I've asked Jess (kind of jokingly), but she reckons she won't have six hundred pounds to take to America if she moves in.

Jess and I are going to go on a helicopter ride over ( Read more... )

12 weeks before: Start doing machine-based Pilates. What is machine-based Pilates? Can't tell, but the website makes it look expensive ( Read more... )

I won!

Gran: How are you getting on with your soups?
Me: I'm still trying to find a decent tomato soup recipe.
Gran: Oh, I get all my soups from Phyllis. I was supposed to see her on Wednesday, actually. She was going to pick up Mary, my cousin, and we were going to go for lunch. But Mary called me and said Phyllis hadn't come to get her and did I know ( Read more... )

Dear Internet Pillock,

STOP IT. GO AWAY. A couple of months ago you used your giant brain to work out that as I hadn't replied to your last three messages, it probably wouldn't do you any good to persist. You have been showing up on my stalker list every couple of days since then (seriously, you must have the whole thing memorised by now, you don't ( Read more... )

"You are an exciting, loving, sexy, feminine, tempestuous, beautiful woman - or you are ready for me to find her in you. You hold no fears of true intimacy - or you are ready for me to overcome them. ... entangled. Together we take on the world and make its booty shake. Our time together is fiery and passionate as we grow through each other. I ( Read more... )