(no subject)
goddamn. can anything else go wrong with me? weekly dizzy/nauseous spells, sometimes to the point of vomiting (i.e. last tuesday) a root canal, right after I puked.. and I mean RIGHT after, within 10mins. The worst immune system in the world- I get sick so easily and so often. and now my tongue is infected, so I took out my tongue rings, well, two of them... I just left the other one in cause i'm lazy right now... but i'm done with this shit.. i want to be normal and pretty, and i'm not. i have to make an appointment for this week hopefully to get a permanent filling and my teeth capped. i need to start making more money so i can make myself more attractive. I keep getting modeling offers, but so far, they've all been ones that involve me taking off my top, which I really am not interested in doing at this point in time. anyway, I get to be on MORE medicine now... and it sucks. I'm so unhappy right now. Just because I don't know what to do with myself. I've been mean to a lot of people, but I think that's because I just don't want them in my life anymore, and I've been too afraid to let go. I just want Lupe to come home, tell me he isn't taking this job in Texas and that he'll stay here with me, to take care of me, to make sure I'm happy, to give me what I want/need. I know if I just married him, I would have so much more. but this is not happening. i'm just rambling now... waiting for my father to come back and make me some food.