Weight Loss Blog (3) - Restless
I have been pretty good today. I skipped breakfast which is bad, but had a salad with self-made dressing and some wholewheat toast for lunch. Then ate a 100 calorie "milk rice" dessert. Dinner consisted of self-made lentil tomato soup, which was literally just lentils, chopped tomato, onion and garlic. I also went for the Zumba masterclass, which is like hardcore Zumba with this Brazilian instructor who keeps getting very into it and shouting a lot. It wasn't fun with a sore throat, but I think it was good.
Therefore, I should feel quite proud, but instead I feel all restless, jumpy and dissatisfied. Isn't "being good" supposed to make you feel good? I feel very fat today, and like I would really overeat right now if I had anything at home to overeat on. Which, thankfully, I don't. :)
The temptations and thoughts are already coming back, the "oh, it would just be today..." and "you're not going to manage anyway, as usual" and "studying will be boring without it". I still eat too fast.
I think partly, I'm paying the price for yesterday. I was in London yesterday for court visits, but I really left shortly after 3pm and walked around for the rest of the day. I also had to walk 2 miles in the morning to get there so after many hours of walking around in the afternoon and evening, I had walked quite a bit. I felt tired and ill, and somehow that diminishes my self-discipline. So when my friend suggested "let's go to the Nordic cafe", I said yes. Of course, I could have done with a latte at the cafe, a well-deserved one after this long day, but it was 7pm and I was hungry and hadn't brought dinner to London with me. So I ate a Scandinavian cinnamon bun at the cafe. :( It was absolutely amazing. I can't even describe how amazing these Nordic cinnamon buns are. They're nothing like the usual ones that are soggy, this one was crispy yet soft on the inside, no frosting or any of that crap. It was delicious. And full of calories I bet...
Anyway, that alone I guess wouldn't have been so bad if the cinnamon bun had then been my dinner. But by the time I got home around 10pm, I felt hungry again because it turns out cinnamon buns aren't the best dinner. So I still had my tortilla wrap that I had planned to have for dinner. :( Well, at least I presume I'm not going to London again anytime soon...
It's so stupid, but it really feels like an addiction today that I'm trying to get out of. No fun.
Therefore, I should feel quite proud, but instead I feel all restless, jumpy and dissatisfied. Isn't "being good" supposed to make you feel good? I feel very fat today, and like I would really overeat right now if I had anything at home to overeat on. Which, thankfully, I don't. :)
The temptations and thoughts are already coming back, the "oh, it would just be today..." and "you're not going to manage anyway, as usual" and "studying will be boring without it". I still eat too fast.
I think partly, I'm paying the price for yesterday. I was in London yesterday for court visits, but I really left shortly after 3pm and walked around for the rest of the day. I also had to walk 2 miles in the morning to get there so after many hours of walking around in the afternoon and evening, I had walked quite a bit. I felt tired and ill, and somehow that diminishes my self-discipline. So when my friend suggested "let's go to the Nordic cafe", I said yes. Of course, I could have done with a latte at the cafe, a well-deserved one after this long day, but it was 7pm and I was hungry and hadn't brought dinner to London with me. So I ate a Scandinavian cinnamon bun at the cafe. :( It was absolutely amazing. I can't even describe how amazing these Nordic cinnamon buns are. They're nothing like the usual ones that are soggy, this one was crispy yet soft on the inside, no frosting or any of that crap. It was delicious. And full of calories I bet...
Anyway, that alone I guess wouldn't have been so bad if the cinnamon bun had then been my dinner. But by the time I got home around 10pm, I felt hungry again because it turns out cinnamon buns aren't the best dinner. So I still had my tortilla wrap that I had planned to have for dinner. :( Well, at least I presume I'm not going to London again anytime soon...
It's so stupid, but it really feels like an addiction today that I'm trying to get out of. No fun.