FUBAR
Yes. That is me.
A little fucked at the moment, truth be told. I don't know, it's been all downhill since my birthday and especially the last couple of days. They've been the ultra shitty nervous for no reason can't quite look anybody in the eye angry apathetic tired as hell and wanting to hurt myself and I don't know why and I don't care days. You know?
And it's my own fault, at least in part, but it's also stupid in a vicious circle kinda way. I can't sleep so I feel like crap so I don't eat so I feel like so I can't sleep so I feel like shit etc. It's not usually this bad. Usually I can fight it off pretty well before it gets to the quicksand point but sometimes I just think these things are out of my control anyways. Sigh.
Like writing. I write quite a lot now. Not generally essays like I should be, but fanfic (see below). I don't even know if it's that good but some people seem to like it. And it makes me feel like I'm actually doing something for a change. The thing is, I've become a total comment whore now and it's really no good for me. I think my writing goes a bit haywire when I can't concentrate anyways so maybe I should take a break and just chill for a bit. Do the things I'm actually being graded on, maybe. Try and give a shit about something.
I just need to relax and adjust my perspective. Everything's all tilted at the moment.