Kyumin!Drabble; Sequel of; You are not mine.
Title: Will we never be together?
sequel of: You are not mine. [kyuhyun-centric]
Pairing: Sungmin-centric, broken!KyuMin, SiMin.
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst.
Summary: How come you made me love you, you love me back and still tell me it's over?
a/n: i was gone again... I worte Eunhae part AND SMUT for LSTF chapter 20!! Look forward to it. I was thinking of a story yesterday, while i was in the car, listening to What if... I got an idea for a squel for 'you are not mine'. I read the drabble/oneshot again and realized i didn't show that sungmin was actually in love with kyu. I decided to write this instead!! have fun reading!!
a/n2: i have twitter by the way ^^ @kyumin_su
Cho Kyuhyun. Why did this happen? Why did it go like this? I had tried so hard to ignore this feelings and you just had to make it all a waste.
Ever since the manager came to us, telling us there would come a new member, I was so happy. The group would have another brother added. I was bouncy everyday, because I couldn't wait to see you, our newly added member. Everyone had to try calming me down everyday, before I would break anything. Leeteuk hyung had to stay by my side to make me fall asleep, because if he didn't I would stay too excited and wouldn't sleep the whole night, because I couldn't wait for you to come. I even dreamed about you coming in the room, I would hug you as soon as you would enter and make a warm welcome, so you wouldn't feel lonely for being added later than us in the group.
But that all changed the day you came the practice room in. The hyperactive, over-excited me from the whole morning, was left frozen when you came in. As soon as I looked you, I could feel my heart beat faster than ever, there was an weird feeling in my stomach and I suddenly had the urge to kiss you, instead of hug you. So I was left on my place, as all the other members greeted you excitedly. I saw you look at me for a moment, but I was too shocked by the new feeling, that I forgot to smile at you. You immediately looked away with a blush and greeted the other's shyly.
That all didn't change after a half year. I had known from the very first day that you came, that I was in love with you. Goddamn, it was more than love. I never believed in love at first sight, but it did exist. And I would have never thought that I would fall so deeply for a guy! That was the exact reason why I always avoided you. I'm a guy and I guess I'm gay, you're a guy and straight. It was a wrong love. A forbidden love. So I had to try hard and forget my feelings or at least, make sure they don't grow bigger. I would be really close with everyone, expect of you, I would never pay attention to you, well I did, but only secretly. I would always watch you in secret. To hide it my feelings. I totally forgot at first that it would only grow my feelings bigger. And before I knew it, I was addicted to you. I couldn't stop loving you. So I kept my distance from you. But you didn't really help me much idiot. Because you kept trying to get close to me, so I had no other choice to act cold toward you. No matter how much I hated it.
Then that day came. I was sitting on the cough and suddenly heard about an accident. I heard you were involved in it, but I tried not to look to worried. Until I saw it on the new, a few minutes later. My heart stopped, tears kept falling and i forgot to breath when I saw your condition while being carried in the ambulance. It broke my heart, I wanted to run out of the dorm and run to you, but it was too late. Heechul told me I muttered your name before I fainted, because of the loss of breath. When I woke up, I was sitting on a seat in front of the emergency room. I didn't know how I came there, but it seemed Siwon carried me to the hospital. Heechul wanted to make sure that I would be there if Kyuhyun came out of the room. He thought it was strange that I was so worried that I cried and fainted, because of you. He knew by then that I didn't dislike you at all.
Once you were charged to a normal room, I didn't want to come visit you. It would hurt me too much to see you like that. But I was getting more worried day by day. I remember crying everynight when you were unconscious. I cried alone in my room, so that no one else would know about it. However Leeteuk still heard me one night and came into my room. He stayed by mt side all the nights I cried. Two members knew now that I cared for you more than anyone. In the end, the members dragged me to the hospital to visit you. I can still remember the bright smile you had when I entered the room, but I was afraid to believe you were happy to see me. It would just give me more false hope. So I tried to hide my smile and happiness by acting as if I didn't care much. When you suddenly felt hurt and changed in mood, the members an me got really worried. Seeing you in pain like that, it was aweful. So I said you would be okay and no one needed to worry, just to calm down my own heart to not worry to much. But that night I cried once again in my bed, regretting not being nice to you and see you in so much pain.
After you were release I continued my act of hating you. Luckily I still had the tv time, were I could show my love for you more. Unfortunaly I had to act cold again once the show was over. It soon wasn't an act when I saw you getting closer with that girl. Was I too selfish? Hating the fact that you became so close with SNSD's maknae? Was it selfish to try keeping you away from her, even though I kept being mean toward you? Was it selfish... To never give the love letter from her to you and tell her that you're not interested just so that you would never date someone else, just because I can't have you? I'm sorry for that. I didn't have a choice. I just love you too much. I felt bad, but still happy. I managed to chase her away from you, but then again, what if you liked her back? It was selfish. But I don't regret a thing about it.
Before I knew it, I came to a point were I couldn't turn back again. I was too in love with you and my obsession for you was on it's climax. I wanted to stop being cold to you. It had to stop! I longed to much for you and couldn't bare the act. Luckily some members confronted me with the fact that I was acting weird and mean toward you. Once again, my stupid mouth decided to ignore them. But the members didn't give up. We moved to a new dorm and they placed us in one room together. It's funny that even until now we're the only members that never changed rooms. It's probably because I managed to let my feelings out [not showing that i love you more than a dongsaeng, but the feeling of wanting to be close with you] after I came back one day from late night scedules and found you crying on your bed. I was shocked that night and couldn't but lay next to you and embrace you. You stopped crying and embraced my back, falling fast a sleep, without saying anything. Do you know how much you made my heart beat that night? Do you know I was so happy that I couldn't sleep the whole night?
I would have never thought you would be so close with me. No matter what we did, where we were, you always wanted to be with me. If it was just playing a game, or eating out, we never separated. You don't know how happy, yet how painful that was for me. I always wished to be so close with you, just as close as EunHae were. But I knew it was just friendship. Well, I didn't knew better at that time! That's why it was so hurtful. Because you didn't feel the same way I did when I was with you.
As time passed by, I began to think that maybe, just maybe, you were in love with me too. At least, you should have grown some feelings toward me right? Or was it just my imagination? I tried to make you know how I felt about you. Like always hugging you when it was not just with others, but only the two of us. I always crept in you bed to sleep with you. I didn't try to hide my blushed and heart beat for you again. I gave you more attention than anyone. I told you you were special. But it seemed that you never cared much about it. I kept waiting for your confession, but I realized it was a waste to wait for something that would never happen. For God's sake, how many times do I have to tell myself you're straight?! You like girls, pretty girls. The ones you always hang out with! So I tried once again to forget my feelings.
And that same moment, Siwon had to come in the picture. He asked me to come with him to the park. It was the day he confessed to me and asked me to date him. I told him I couldn't, because there was someone else in my heart, you. But he didn't mind and kissed me. He told me he would be better than that person and that he would make sure I would fall for him and forget that person for sure. Wasn't it tempting? Just when I wanted to try forget you again, but I didn't know how, Siwon came in the picture and told me I would forget you? So I said yes and decided to date him.
You! Why did you have to let this happen?! You made me do the thing that I hate the most. You made me break my own heart. You... You. You should have told me before. That day. Couldn't you do it sooner?! It would have saved a lot of broken hearts. You make me want to hit myself, kill myself. You said the words that I couldn't hate, if you said them sooner. Why did you wait so long?
"Sungmin, hyung... I... I love you." You told me the words I waited so long for. You confessed to me. I was so happr from the inside, but then I remembered reality. I gave my love up for you. The love that I worked on so long, all the ignoring, all the regretting, all the forgetting, all the pain, all the love, all the longing, all the hope, you finally returned the feeling. But too late. I'm with Siwon. I-I-... I'm lost. I love you, I love you so much. I want you. But...
"I-I'm sorry Kyu... I'm already dating Siwon..." You're my everything. But you're too late. I waited for you, I thought you didn't love me, so I dated Siwon. Wait... Are you? Are we? Is it too late? all the hard work. Was it for nothing? It wasn't... You love me? You love me! You love me back! It's a waste if you love me back right?
You loved me all this time, you love me! I... I can't end it like that. I don't want Siwon, I want you! I only want you. I should confess now. I don't care about anything else, I want you. Only you. You're my perfection, my everything.
"Ky-" I wanted to confess that moment. But you ruined. Tears formed in my eyes as you said those hurtful words.
"It's okay Min... I'm sorry. I hope he will make you happy... I guess it's over... " W-what do you mean? Y-you're letting me go? How? How can you? It's not over, Kyu. He will never make me happy, especially now that I know you love me. I grabbed your arm that time, so that you would see me. I was speechless... I couldn't say anything. If only you would look into my eyes, you would see that the person I love is you. But you said those words and walked away. without a word. I couldn't do anything.
'Kyuhyun... Is it really over... Are we really done, without even trying? Will we never be together...'
-end-
sequel of: You are not mine. [kyuhyun-centric]
Pairing: Sungmin-centric, broken!KyuMin, SiMin.
Rating: PG
Genre: Angst.
Summary: How come you made me love you, you love me back and still tell me it's over?
a/n: i was gone again... I worte Eunhae part AND SMUT for LSTF chapter 20!! Look forward to it. I was thinking of a story yesterday, while i was in the car, listening to What if... I got an idea for a squel for 'you are not mine'. I read the drabble/oneshot again and realized i didn't show that sungmin was actually in love with kyu. I decided to write this instead!! have fun reading!!
a/n2: i have twitter by the way ^^ @kyumin_su
Cho Kyuhyun. Why did this happen? Why did it go like this? I had tried so hard to ignore this feelings and you just had to make it all a waste.
Ever since the manager came to us, telling us there would come a new member, I was so happy. The group would have another brother added. I was bouncy everyday, because I couldn't wait to see you, our newly added member. Everyone had to try calming me down everyday, before I would break anything. Leeteuk hyung had to stay by my side to make me fall asleep, because if he didn't I would stay too excited and wouldn't sleep the whole night, because I couldn't wait for you to come. I even dreamed about you coming in the room, I would hug you as soon as you would enter and make a warm welcome, so you wouldn't feel lonely for being added later than us in the group.
But that all changed the day you came the practice room in. The hyperactive, over-excited me from the whole morning, was left frozen when you came in. As soon as I looked you, I could feel my heart beat faster than ever, there was an weird feeling in my stomach and I suddenly had the urge to kiss you, instead of hug you. So I was left on my place, as all the other members greeted you excitedly. I saw you look at me for a moment, but I was too shocked by the new feeling, that I forgot to smile at you. You immediately looked away with a blush and greeted the other's shyly.
That all didn't change after a half year. I had known from the very first day that you came, that I was in love with you. Goddamn, it was more than love. I never believed in love at first sight, but it did exist. And I would have never thought that I would fall so deeply for a guy! That was the exact reason why I always avoided you. I'm a guy and I guess I'm gay, you're a guy and straight. It was a wrong love. A forbidden love. So I had to try hard and forget my feelings or at least, make sure they don't grow bigger. I would be really close with everyone, expect of you, I would never pay attention to you, well I did, but only secretly. I would always watch you in secret. To hide it my feelings. I totally forgot at first that it would only grow my feelings bigger. And before I knew it, I was addicted to you. I couldn't stop loving you. So I kept my distance from you. But you didn't really help me much idiot. Because you kept trying to get close to me, so I had no other choice to act cold toward you. No matter how much I hated it.
Then that day came. I was sitting on the cough and suddenly heard about an accident. I heard you were involved in it, but I tried not to look to worried. Until I saw it on the new, a few minutes later. My heart stopped, tears kept falling and i forgot to breath when I saw your condition while being carried in the ambulance. It broke my heart, I wanted to run out of the dorm and run to you, but it was too late. Heechul told me I muttered your name before I fainted, because of the loss of breath. When I woke up, I was sitting on a seat in front of the emergency room. I didn't know how I came there, but it seemed Siwon carried me to the hospital. Heechul wanted to make sure that I would be there if Kyuhyun came out of the room. He thought it was strange that I was so worried that I cried and fainted, because of you. He knew by then that I didn't dislike you at all.
Once you were charged to a normal room, I didn't want to come visit you. It would hurt me too much to see you like that. But I was getting more worried day by day. I remember crying everynight when you were unconscious. I cried alone in my room, so that no one else would know about it. However Leeteuk still heard me one night and came into my room. He stayed by mt side all the nights I cried. Two members knew now that I cared for you more than anyone. In the end, the members dragged me to the hospital to visit you. I can still remember the bright smile you had when I entered the room, but I was afraid to believe you were happy to see me. It would just give me more false hope. So I tried to hide my smile and happiness by acting as if I didn't care much. When you suddenly felt hurt and changed in mood, the members an me got really worried. Seeing you in pain like that, it was aweful. So I said you would be okay and no one needed to worry, just to calm down my own heart to not worry to much. But that night I cried once again in my bed, regretting not being nice to you and see you in so much pain.
After you were release I continued my act of hating you. Luckily I still had the tv time, were I could show my love for you more. Unfortunaly I had to act cold again once the show was over. It soon wasn't an act when I saw you getting closer with that girl. Was I too selfish? Hating the fact that you became so close with SNSD's maknae? Was it selfish to try keeping you away from her, even though I kept being mean toward you? Was it selfish... To never give the love letter from her to you and tell her that you're not interested just so that you would never date someone else, just because I can't have you? I'm sorry for that. I didn't have a choice. I just love you too much. I felt bad, but still happy. I managed to chase her away from you, but then again, what if you liked her back? It was selfish. But I don't regret a thing about it.
Before I knew it, I came to a point were I couldn't turn back again. I was too in love with you and my obsession for you was on it's climax. I wanted to stop being cold to you. It had to stop! I longed to much for you and couldn't bare the act. Luckily some members confronted me with the fact that I was acting weird and mean toward you. Once again, my stupid mouth decided to ignore them. But the members didn't give up. We moved to a new dorm and they placed us in one room together. It's funny that even until now we're the only members that never changed rooms. It's probably because I managed to let my feelings out [not showing that i love you more than a dongsaeng, but the feeling of wanting to be close with you] after I came back one day from late night scedules and found you crying on your bed. I was shocked that night and couldn't but lay next to you and embrace you. You stopped crying and embraced my back, falling fast a sleep, without saying anything. Do you know how much you made my heart beat that night? Do you know I was so happy that I couldn't sleep the whole night?
I would have never thought you would be so close with me. No matter what we did, where we were, you always wanted to be with me. If it was just playing a game, or eating out, we never separated. You don't know how happy, yet how painful that was for me. I always wished to be so close with you, just as close as EunHae were. But I knew it was just friendship. Well, I didn't knew better at that time! That's why it was so hurtful. Because you didn't feel the same way I did when I was with you.
As time passed by, I began to think that maybe, just maybe, you were in love with me too. At least, you should have grown some feelings toward me right? Or was it just my imagination? I tried to make you know how I felt about you. Like always hugging you when it was not just with others, but only the two of us. I always crept in you bed to sleep with you. I didn't try to hide my blushed and heart beat for you again. I gave you more attention than anyone. I told you you were special. But it seemed that you never cared much about it. I kept waiting for your confession, but I realized it was a waste to wait for something that would never happen. For God's sake, how many times do I have to tell myself you're straight?! You like girls, pretty girls. The ones you always hang out with! So I tried once again to forget my feelings.
And that same moment, Siwon had to come in the picture. He asked me to come with him to the park. It was the day he confessed to me and asked me to date him. I told him I couldn't, because there was someone else in my heart, you. But he didn't mind and kissed me. He told me he would be better than that person and that he would make sure I would fall for him and forget that person for sure. Wasn't it tempting? Just when I wanted to try forget you again, but I didn't know how, Siwon came in the picture and told me I would forget you? So I said yes and decided to date him.
You! Why did you have to let this happen?! You made me do the thing that I hate the most. You made me break my own heart. You... You. You should have told me before. That day. Couldn't you do it sooner?! It would have saved a lot of broken hearts. You make me want to hit myself, kill myself. You said the words that I couldn't hate, if you said them sooner. Why did you wait so long?
"Sungmin, hyung... I... I love you." You told me the words I waited so long for. You confessed to me. I was so happr from the inside, but then I remembered reality. I gave my love up for you. The love that I worked on so long, all the ignoring, all the regretting, all the forgetting, all the pain, all the love, all the longing, all the hope, you finally returned the feeling. But too late. I'm with Siwon. I-I-... I'm lost. I love you, I love you so much. I want you. But...
"I-I'm sorry Kyu... I'm already dating Siwon..." You're my everything. But you're too late. I waited for you, I thought you didn't love me, so I dated Siwon. Wait... Are you? Are we? Is it too late? all the hard work. Was it for nothing? It wasn't... You love me? You love me! You love me back! It's a waste if you love me back right?
You loved me all this time, you love me! I... I can't end it like that. I don't want Siwon, I want you! I only want you. I should confess now. I don't care about anything else, I want you. Only you. You're my perfection, my everything.
"Ky-" I wanted to confess that moment. But you ruined. Tears formed in my eyes as you said those hurtful words.
"It's okay Min... I'm sorry. I hope he will make you happy... I guess it's over... " W-what do you mean? Y-you're letting me go? How? How can you? It's not over, Kyu. He will never make me happy, especially now that I know you love me. I grabbed your arm that time, so that you would see me. I was speechless... I couldn't say anything. If only you would look into my eyes, you would see that the person I love is you. But you said those words and walked away. without a word. I couldn't do anything.
'Kyuhyun... Is it really over... Are we really done, without even trying? Will we never be together...'
-end-